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Key passages
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- 2:10
the subject is selflessness and self-esteem. Because the Buddha approaches the self a very direct way. when we use the English word self, of course, this up kinds of ideas or reactions in our mind.
- 13:43
In the Theravāda school they emphasized this anattā or no self. Non-self. And of course people, this is probably one of the, this is one of the three characteristics of all phenomena.
- 19:22
On being able to share or give selflessly and not just hoarding up, not just keeping and thinking of yourself alone, but at least encouragement. It's not a command, not an imperative, but an encouragement to be generous. So in countries like Thailand, Sri Lanka, it's very obvious the kind of effect it has on the culture.
- 23:04
So in the Buddhist term of sīla, as we translate that into the English word morality, sīla, they're not commandments but precepts. They're guidelines. And, of course, sīla is something you have to ask for.
- 44:50
And that's the pattern of conditioned phenomena. When we contemplate our own breath, breathing, isn't it? When we start meditation practice, we usually encourage people to just contemplate the natural breathing that's going on in their own bodies. Because that That is the pattern of conditioned phenomena, inhalation, exhalation, arising and ceasing.
Transcript
0:01 I wish to welcome everyone this afternoon. And Report an error in the passage at 0:01
0:13 these afternoon talks on Sunday are for reflection. And again, I reiterate, it's to see how what you hear affects you. With Buddhism, it's not a dogmatic approach. The Buddhist emphasis was on mindfulness. Report an error in the passage at 0:13
0:41 This is the essence of all Buddhist teaching, is awakened awareness. And this emphasis, of course, is quite, even though it's quite, you know, it's something that we have to admit is right, it's not necessarily the way we approach religion generally in the Western world. Report an error in the passage at 0:41
1:15 And most of us were brought up to either believe or disbelieve in what the priest says or the scriptures say. We're forced into taking sides. But with the Buddhist teaching, it's for reflection, contemplation, to begin to tune into yourself and recognize the natural state of awareness. Report an error in the passage at 1:15
1:45 That even though it's natural and necessary, it's never been something that has been emphasized or really given of great importance in Western philosophy or religion. So Report an error in the passage at 1:45
2:10 the subject is selflessness and self-esteem. Because the Buddha approaches the self a very direct way. when we use the English word self, of course, this up kinds of ideas or reactions in our mind. Selflessness is generally an ideal we have of not being selfish. Being selfish always implies something rather negative. Report an error in the passage at 2:10
2:47 You can intimidate somebody. somebody and and criticize them by saying they're selfish then somebody says you're selfish well how do you feel you never feel that's a compliment Report an error in the passage at 2:47
3:01 inspired by that, you feel attacked maybe or put down. Selflessness then is an ideal in Western terms, being selfless, where you aren't putting your own interests in the center of everything, where you can give Your attention or consideration put somebody else in front of you or above you or even if it's against your own selfish interests or desires. Report an error in the passage at 3:01
3:34 So selflessness is usually a quality of a saint in the Western way we use that word. And self-esteem now is a modern term for having a good sense of yourself. Report an error in the passage at 3:34
3:53 We oftentimes, you know, you're developing self-esteem or we use the word ego, having a good ego. Many of us in the West have, you know, we have this sense of the ego of being a person, a personality, a unique personality even. But to say somebody who's egotistical, that's usually a criticism. ego. Report an error in the passage at 3:53
4:24 Where they're self-centered and self-important. Report an error in the passage at 4:24
4:29 And the word self-esteem is quite a good one because in our lives, in order to be happy and live in the society, even in a worldly way, if we lack a sense of self-esteem, then even under the best conditions, we create endless suffering. Report an error in the passage at 4:29
4:54 Very easy to be self-critical in societies like this one because there are so many ideals about how you should be, what a good person should be, what a man should be, a woman should be, a husband, a wife, a leader, and all and all like this. The roles that we have in the society, we have Report an error in the passage at 4:54
5:24 We give them these ideals, which are always based on very good qualities, like being selfless. As a mother, isn't it? A mother should be selfless. A good mother is selfless. And a good leader, or a king even. A proper king, according to the Asian standards of kingship, is a selfless being. Report an error in the passage at 5:24
5:55 In the Pāli canon, if you come across the ten raja-dhammas, the dhammas necessary for a good leader or a king, they're all very inspired, a sense of selflessness. The king has to put the country, the whole nation, ahead of himself. And yet in the West, we oftentimes think of a king as being someone who's got all the advantages and says, the whole thing is mine. Report an error in the passage at 5:55
6:23 I get first choice in the best of everything. Report an error in the passage at 6:23
6:30 Well, in Buddhist terms, in the sense of a raja or a king, this would be a very bad king. Report an error in the passage at 6:30
6:46 So the existential reality that we all face is that each one of us happens to be the center of experience. I've oftentimes reflected on this. that recognize that the reality of this moment is that even if I were sitting in the group, and I wasn't sitting on a high seat talking into a microphone, I'd still, this is the center that I experience from, from this point. Report an error in the passage at 6:46
7:16 And so, for each one of us, we are the center of the universe, not as a kind of megalomaniac ideal, but as a reality, because that's the way it is. So just contemplate that yourselves in terms of experience for your whole life, from the time you were born as a newborn infant to the present moment, the experiences come to you in whatever pleasant, painful, undesirable conditions. Report an error in the passage at 7:16
7:51 And so that we have, you know, this sense of selfishness or... Report an error in the passage at 7:51
8:12 terms of ideals, then we see ourselves as members of a community, of a family, society, and then we have ideals of sharing the wealth and everybody's equal and the common values of democracy or socialism, communism, all based on... Everybody should have equal rights and we shouldn't discriminate and have preferences even in regards to class or position in the society that in the long run this sense of equality, egalitarian idealism is very much the modern way we think and we judge, we make judgments. Report an error in the passage at 8:12
9:02 About our experience within our social group and the society that we're living in. In the Western world, where, say, myself being brought up in the United States is a very egalitarian society as an ideal, not necessarily in practice, in the reality of it, but in the idealism of Americans is that everyone is equal. Report an error in the passage at 9:02
9:34 Or should be. And so when we put ourselves in a society where everyone is equal, that is a beautiful ideal. And I like that ideal myself. I don't have any fault with that. But then in terms of the reality of this moment, what's equality? Report an error in the passage at 9:34
9:56 How many of you could sit up on this little podium with me? Equally. -Aid. You know, in terms of who goes to the door first, or who's first in line, and so forth, these are matters of agreement, of etiquette and convention that we have in terms of, we still have to deal with hierarchical structures. Report an error in the passage at 9:56
10:27 Instead of fighting over who's first in line, we agree that the senior monk or whatever goes first. And that's not a statement about... Who goes first is somehow better than who goes last. It's just a social agreement and a form of etiquette that makes living together more smooth, more possible, less confused. Report an error in the passage at 10:27
10:54 In monastic life, you have the Buddha established the dhamma and the vinaya. The dhamma, of course, is the truth of the way it is. Report an error in the passage at 10:54
11:07 And that's where we're all equal. We all have this equal... Ability to see things, to awaken, to know things as they are. And then in terms of the Vinaya or the discipline, these are the social agreements of Saṅgha on how we're going to relate to each other as a community or as a Saṅgha, so that our flow of life is agreed on in terms of its practicalities, not in terms of saying who the best one goes first. Report an error in the passage at 11:07
11:40 Because then there would be an endless conflict in this community. Report an error in the passage at 11:40
11:48 Sometimes in the Western mind we think that it is that, that we're making a statement about who's the best, when in reality that's not it at all. In terms of monastic etiquette, you know, if the senior monk is a coarse character, full of doubts and And not very admirable as an individual. The very fact that he's senior means that he's the one that we would pay respect to as a community, in a group. Report an error in the passage at 11:48
12:25 Because then we're avoiding the conflict that would arise. We would pay respect to the monk or the nun who is enlightened and who is the most advanced. And then problems would arise from that. Because then also the sense of our self-views would take preference. I've heard people say, I'm not going to bow to that monk because he's not worthy. Report an error in the passage at 12:25
12:52 And I've even felt that myself in Thailand. One time I lived with a monk I was quite critical of. I could hear myself say, I don't think I'll bow to him because I don't think he's worthy. And then I started listening. Listening to myself. Report an error in the passage at 12:52
13:13 You know, who do I think I am that my bows are so good that I can only bow to the best? That sounds like a real conceit. Report an error in the passage at 13:13
13:28 A Report an error in the passage at 13:28
13:33 few years ago, I think about 10, 15 years ago, in Britain there used to be a lot of controversy around the teaching of anattā. In the Theravāda school they emphasized this anattā or no self. Non-self. And of course people, this is probably one of the, this is one of the three characteristics of all phenomena. Report an error in the passage at 13:33
13:59 I mean, in the Dhamma teachings of the Buddha and the scriptures, anattā is given as a characteristic common to all phenomena, including this phenomena, this thing here as well as all the rest. Report an error in the passage at 13:59
14:18 So anattā then It's very hard to understand sometimes from a Western way of thinking because in our own cultural setting, we're brought up to think of the reality of self. I was brought up in a tradition where the sense of self was even carried on after death. You had a soul. So I used to ask, well, what is a soul? Report an error in the passage at 14:18
14:45 What is it that will be when I die, when my body dies? My soul will, if I've been good, will go to heaven. And I said, well, what will that be like? What will a soul be like? Well, you'll be yourself. Report an error in the passage at 14:45
15:01 So I guess I would still have my personality maybe. Anyway, I couldn't quite get the point because this sense of I would keep my unique sense of me as a separate self through eternity. And this, of course, In the concept of anattā in Buddhism is the great challenge to contemplate anattā or non-self. Report an error in the passage at 15:01
15:33 And so the controversy was around, especially in the world of psychotherapy and psychology, was the belief that you had to have a self in order to let it go. And you had to have a good ego, in other words. In order to be able to let go of it. Otherwise, if you were just fighting against the sense of self, you would somehow, that would not be a very psychologically healthy way of living. Report an error in the passage at 15:33
16:05 Which is true. I'm not against that view. And it's well worthy of consideration. Report an error in the passage at 16:05
16:17 Then sometimes Buddhists can grasp the idea of non-self almost as a dogma. And by grasping the very concept of anattā, it becomes a kind of dogmatic position one takes in an absolute way. There is no self, and that's it. And any sign of self you've got to get rid of. You've got to destroy selfishness in all its forms, eradicate it, extirpate it. Report an error in the passage at 16:17
16:46 And then, you know, let's take in the concept of anattā. Not reflecting on non-self or using the concept of anattā, but grasping an idea of it and the logic that comes from that grasping. So this is not what the Buddha was encouraging. It's not a dogmatic view that there is no self. So in terms of reflection, we explore the experience of self rather than just... Report an error in the passage at 16:46
17:22 Judging ourselves or criticizing ourselves for feeling selfish. It's very important to look at selfishness, to know it. When the impulses of selfish feeling arise, if we're coming from the idea we shouldn't be selfish, then we endlessly feel guilty or disparage ourselves for having selfish impulses. Selfish emotions. So because of the attachment to the idea of being selfless, then when we recognize selfishness in ourselves, we tend to make a judgment about we shouldn't be selfish. Report an error in the passage at 17:22
18:10 And then we disparage ourselves. Report an error in the passage at 18:10
18:15 So in Buddhism, it's constructed in a way that, say, the basic foundation for a happy life. As a human being. And this doesn't necessarily mean being Buddhist or being religious in any way. Maybe someone's not at all interested in spiritual development or nibbāna or anything like that. Maybe they just want a happy life on earth. Report an error in the passage at 18:15
18:47 And of course in Buddhism they give advice for this kind of life. And the basis for happiness in the world is based on generosity and sīla, morality. So in Pāli scriptures, you have these three stages, dana, sīla, pavana. Dana is the Pāli word for generosity. And this is the kind of foundation of Buddhism. It's based on this. Report an error in the passage at 18:47
19:22 On being able to share or give selflessly and not just hoarding up, not just keeping and thinking of yourself alone, but at least encouragement. It's not a command, not an imperative, but an encouragement to be generous. So in countries like Thailand, Sri Lanka, it's very obvious the kind of effect it has on the culture. Report an error in the passage at 19:22
19:53 Because in Buddhist countries, people are generally very, very generous. And in a way that is quite surprising, I think, to most of us. We aren't expecting such a high level of generosity or so kind of immediate and spontaneous as at least I've experienced in Asia. Report an error in the passage at 19:53
20:17 Because this is the kind of basis of the culture. And so the ideal for all Buddhists is to, at least, it doesn't make kind of, you have to be generous every moment of your life, but where you do have moments of wanting to help somebody else or give or share, give something of yours, you know, not just get rid of what you've already become bored with, but being able to share even what you want. Report an error in the passage at 20:17
20:52 Sometimes it's very moving. When people come here, you know, Asian Buddhists come here with a baby, a child, and we go on the alms round, and the child has some sweets, and the mother is saying, now put it in the alms bowl. And the child, of course, wants the sweets. And it's torn between doing what mother says and keeping it for himself. Report an error in the passage at 20:52
21:23 And sometimes children will just let it go into the arms bowl, and I find that quite moving as an experience for myself, because I know what it's like to, especially when you're a child, you know, something like that, you don't have the worldly wisdom to understand all the details of it, and the immediacy of one's desires is very urgent to keep it. Report an error in the passage at 21:23
21:51 I want to keep it for myself. And yet, that gentle movement, a training in giving something you really want for yourself to somebody else, think is a very good, beautiful way to get that message across. Report an error in the passage at 21:51
22:11 it's forced or you're kind of brutalizing the child into doing it, then you've missed the point. So, then... Sīla or morality. Morality is also seen in a very different way in the Buddhist world because in the West morality is a kind of imperative from above and immorality should be punished and morality rewarded. Report an error in the passage at 22:11
22:51 So there's this sense of reward and punishment and fear of being immoral, being punished, and feeling that morality, you deserve some kind of reward for it. So in the Buddhist term of sīla, as we translate that into the English word morality, sīla, they're not commandments but precepts. They're guidelines. And, of course, sīla is something you have to ask for. Report an error in the passage at 22:51
23:22 It's forbidden in monastic rule for me to force you to take the sīla. In fact, every Sunday the people come here before the meal and they request the five precepts. This is part of the tradition. But also it's quite beautiful in its own way because it is asking for this rather than me. Imposing it upon you by saying you will be punished if you don't take the five precepts. I can frighten you into doing it. Report an error in the passage at 23:22
24:05 But then that's not really good sīla, is it? If you're just keeping precepts because you're frightened. But if you recognize the value of these precepts because the five precepts are precepts that that out. Report an error in the passage at 24:05
24:22 How to live in a society where we create a sense of harmony and we're not threatening, we're not abusing, we're not taking advantage, exploiting ourself or anyone else. Report an error in the passage at 24:22
24:40 It's taking responsibility, being responsible for how we live, for what we do, what we say in the society that we are in. Report an error in the passage at 24:40
24:55 So in terms of worldly happiness and developing self-esteem, dhanasila to me are the kind of foundation. When you see yourself in terms of, when you love to be generous and you are responsible for your life, then you do develop a good sense of yourself as being somebody good or worthy, kind or generous. Report an error in the passage at 24:55
25:20 So this is like self-esteem. Having a good sense of yourself and your position in your family and in your society. Well, this is a very good thing, self-esteem. To see yourself as in a good way, in a positive way, not in a boasting way or an exaggerated way, which would be called egotistical. Self-esteem is more cool than that. It isn't inflated. Report an error in the passage at 25:20
25:52 But it is a genuine sense of self-worth within your family, within your society. Report an error in the passage at 25:52
26:01 I found in my own experience of life, coming from a background where it was a moral-based family, very good family, generous, and yet the ideals of my generation were Very much to live life for yourself. And my generation, we were very much concerned with experience. Remember in university, this was the word. You should go out and experience. And everything, even, you know, no matter what that might involve, experience was something you should be doing. Report an error in the passage at 26:01
26:49 And it usually meant experience things you shouldn't be doing, actually. Report an error in the passage at 26:49
26:55 But this was the idea of my generation, of the 50s in the United States. The idea of this kind of freedom, this hedonistic attitude of go out and just live and do what you want, no boundaries. A sense of rights, proclaiming, you know, demanding your rights and putting your rights above everything else. Report an error in the passage at 26:55
27:20 So from this experience, I found Living in this way, I didn't develop self-esteem. You know, I did, it had its, you know, I had some good times, admittedly, but in terms of self-esteem, I didn't develop because I found myself one day, you know, contemplating suicide or thinking that life is, you know, I just... Report an error in the passage at 27:20
27:55 I couldn't stand myself anymore because my life had become so self-centered, so obsessed with my own self-importance and my own views and concern about myself over everyone else. There was nobody more important. The obsessions around me were so all-pervading, relentless. Report an error in the passage at 27:55
28:24 And this was a kind of living hell, you know, where you just created, just wanted to stop living. You know, it was just too unpleasant, too unbearable. Report an error in the passage at 28:24
28:38 So then the opportunity to take on the robe and so forth came before I committed suicide. Report an error in the passage at 28:38
28:52 And because this was, this of course had to, this becoming a Buddhist monk, of course, Suicide. Report an error in the passage at 28:52
29:00 It meant that I had to live in a different way, that I wasn't, you know, directing and control of. I had to conform, I had to help, I had to be part of a community. I just, I couldn't think of just me, myself, my interests, my views and opinions anymore. I had to take into account the monks, the other monks, the lay people, and so the monastic community, Buddhist community that I was living with. Report an error in the passage at 29:00
29:31 And of course the concepts of Dhanasila were very much, you know, part of the training. So I really began to investigate generosity, even though I've never been, you know, just a really stingy person. I never really contemplated or really understood dhana or generosity. Report an error in the passage at 29:31
29:58 You know, the ideal, my idea was to be generous. But it was never really considered, never contemplated, never really noticed the results of generosity. It was more of an ideal I had. That's how you should be. You should be generous. And it's wicked to be stingy. Report an error in the passage at 29:58
30:22 So in monastic life, generosity, because it's such a foundation, such a basis for living the monastic life, being a Buddhist monk, you immediately... Report an error in the passage at 30:22
31:01 It seems, you know, to proclaim your independence. I don't need anybody. I can take care of myself completely. I'm an independent person that doesn't need anybody. I don't depend on anyone for anything, was an ideal. And then becoming a Buddhist monk, of course, the reverse. Suddenly I am dependent on the very basic needs of food and shelter. Report an error in the passage at 31:01
31:31 Robes, medicine, very basic things, you know, because you give up your rights over money and property and you can't go shopping and buying what you like and you have to depend on just what is offered. Report an error in the passage at 31:31
31:51 So this, of course, I found when I contemplated the generosity extended to me by others. Just by reflecting on that every day, because every meal, like this morning when the food was offered here and we had our meal, this was all generous offerings. Report an error in the passage at 31:51
32:12 This food was prepared, brought here, and then given to us. And we reflect on that in terms of we aren't taking it for granted. We aren't just doing this procedure without reflecting on it. So over the years, of course, this reflection on I am now dependent on the goodness of others develops a true appreciation of generosity, that my life as a Buddhist monk, the support that I get for my spiritual practice, the basic needs in order to survive just as a human. Report an error in the passage at 32:12
32:59 Being on the planet, these basic needs are provided generously by others. And this, of course, makes it possible for me to devote my life to spiritual practice. Report an error in the passage at 32:59
33:15 Because if I had to go out and try to get a meal every day, the times wouldn't have all the such wonderful opportunities for meditation. Report an error in the passage at 33:15
33:29 So reflecting in this way, it creates this sense of gratitude. Report an error in the passage at 33:29
33:41 Then generosity, when you feel, when you become the object of generosity and support from others and you reflect on it, then it brings out generosity in yourself. Report an error in the passage at 33:41
33:55 And so the idea of just living my life, you feeding me and me meditating. Report an error in the passage at 33:55
34:07 That seems a bit narrow. It doesn't give me self-esteem. Your duty is to feed me so I can meditate and leave me alone because I'm busy and you might disrupt my samādhi. But the insight into wanting to offer back something in return, generosity in terms of sharing what I've learned, what I've developed while in this monastic. Report an error in the passage at 34:07
34:38 So then Amaravati, it's a result of that, the physical monastery, is the intention of establishing a place where people can come, where people can also practice meditation, where dhanasila are encouraged, and the Buddhist teaching can be made available to anyone who's interested. Report an error in the passage at 34:38
35:07 This monastery actually was built as a result of generosity, of dhanasila pavana. Just the property, the buildings on it, they're all from donations. Report an error in the passage at 35:07
35:24 It's all possible through donations. Report an error in the passage at 35:24
35:31 So then the self-esteem is this sense of myself as being worthy. worthy of, you know, that I'm not cheating, I'm not living this life in a deceitful way or just using it for my own ends, but contemplating, learning from it, using it in order to develop sati, mindfulness and wisdom. Report an error in the passage at 35:31
36:05 So then the sense of oneself is a positive in terms of my presence. My existence in this society, I see it in terms of, in a positive way, that my intention is to be that in the society which is unselfish, is here to support goodness and move towards harmony and peace, towards teaching the dharma. Report an error in the passage at 36:05
36:42 But then the pawana, or the Pāli word for developing awareness. Now pawana is really, like the word meditation in English covers so many different kind of mental exercises. It's a kind of generic term for anything you do with your mind. But pawana, in this case, when we use dhanasila pawana, it's Bhawan always refers to development or cultivation of awareness or seeing things as they are, seeing the dhamma. Report an error in the passage at 36:42
37:19 So in Buddhist terms, seeing or knowing, this sense of knowing is even a better word because the experience of consciousness in a form means that we're in a position of knowing this moment. Like myself sitting in this This is the reality of knowing. And not knowing about or having all kinds of views and opinions about this moment or how it should or shouldn't be. Report an error in the passage at 37:19
37:58 Or being caught up in the details of it. Sometimes people are very critical. They spend their time looking at, knowing the flaws, seeing what they don't like. Or whatever, but this knowing isn't using one's critical factors, but knowing this moment, being awake, aware, open to the reality of this moment is the existential reality of being, isn't it? Report an error in the passage at 37:58
38:28 Of the consciousness within this form from this point. So developing this knowing because the habit tendencies caused through ignorance of the Dhamma are usually, we don't know things as they are. We may know about all kinds of things. Because of the nature of our mind we have We have retentive memories. Education to us is acquiring knowledge about things. And so we go to school, to universities, to colleges and so forth to gather information about science, the arts, literature, religion, whatever. Report an error in the passage at 38:28
39:33 And so we learn a lot about history and geography, mathematics. Report an error in the passage at 39:33
39:42 But the real knowing is never, you know, in my experience of modern education, was never alluded to in any way. Report an error in the passage at 39:42
39:54 The word meditation, when I was in university, was, I don't think I ever heard it used. And I remember when I first came to live in England in 1977, even then, here in London, people would When he talked about meditation, they didn't quite know what that meant. Well, they thought it was something weird. You know, I guess it's because the way I, what I wear, you know, they think everything that I do must be weird or strange. Report an error in the passage at 39:54
40:26 And they say, what do you do? I practice meditation. What's that? You know, what do you do? Imagine, you know, anything could be possible if you don't know. are you doing? Report an error in the passage at 40:26
40:37 know. Report an error in the passage at 40:37
40:41 So pāwanā is really the break from this sequence of dhanasila, which gives you, which allows a foundation for pāwanā, but also, if that's all the further you go, it does create a sense of self-esteem and contributes to worldly success and worldly happiness. Report an error in the passage at 40:41
41:07 So Buddhism oftentimes is seen As a kind of anti-world, against pleasure, you know, just let me reach nibbāna so I can be extinguished forever kind of teaching. But actually in Pāli Buddhism and in all forms of Buddhism, there are very deliberate instructions on how to find happiness in the world. They don't guarantee happiness in the world is going to be lasting and truly satisfying, but it does happen. Report an error in the passage at 41:07
41:40 And it is possible. But worldly life, meaning the condition phenomena that we identify with, is in itself unsatisfactory. It changes. How much control do you have over your body, over the family, over the society or the world that you live in? And how much can you, even if you're extremely wealthy and powerful, you know, how... Report an error in the passage at 41:40
42:09 How much control can you generate to make your life fit into an ideal of perfection that lasts? And of course it's impossible. It's not possible because that's not the way it is. The conditioned realm is a changing one. And to not want it to change is a kind of futile desire, isn't it? If I want something changing to be permanent, then... Report an error in the passage at 42:09
42:40 I'm going to be disappointed my whole life. I just spend my life being disappointed because I'm asking for the impossible. So awakening and knowing things as they are means that when I open myself and reflect on the way it is, then I begin to notice that everything's changing. The nature of phenomena, of conditions, of bodies, of... Report an error in the passage at 42:40
43:10 of the material world, of the mental states, of emotion, of thought and memory, societies, monasteries, religions, everything is in this state of inexorable change, of beginning, ending, because change involves movement that begins and ends. Report an error in the passage at 43:10
43:36 And conditioned phenomena, of course, is about birth and death. It's about... Beginning and ending, starting and finishing. Report an error in the passage at 43:36
43:45 And so in Bhavan now, we begin to really notice this, you know, contemplate change, not criticizing or forming opinions about change, but informing ourselves through awakening to the conditions that we are experiencing in the present, such as the body, physical body, or the emotional. Emotional in the present, the mental states, pleasurable, the sense experiences through the eyes, ears, nose, tongue, through the body, This is the experience of continuous changingness, beginning and ending. Report an error in the passage at 43:45
44:34 It doesn't change, it just begins and keeps going. doesn't change. Report an error in the passage at 44:34
44:40 Birth always implies the beginning of something. It grow up, reach a peak, and then old age, sickness, death, and that's the end. And that's the pattern of conditioned phenomena. When we contemplate our own breath, breathing, isn't it? When we start meditation practice, we usually encourage people to just contemplate the natural breathing that's going on in their own bodies. Report an error in the passage at 44:40
45:08 Because that That is the pattern of conditioned phenomena, inhalation, exhalation, arising and ceasing. And by noticing this, by affirming this, through knowing this in a direct way, not just holding a view about arising, ceasing, but really being with the arising and the ceasing of any condition, we begin to awaken. Report an error in the passage at 45:08
45:39 And have the insight into all conditioned phenomena, whether it's subtle mental conditions or coarse material ones, they all have this work on the same pattern. The pattern is the same for everything. Report an error in the passage at 45:39
46:01 So Pāvanā begins when we practice or cultivate this awareness and this wisdom, then we also, the aim is to realize Report an error in the passage at 46:01
46:19 Realize deathlessness, or what we call the unconditioned, or nibbāna. Now this enigmatic word in Buddhism, nibbāna, is an exotic word for all of us. And of course it gets used for all kinds of things now. Rock groups and fashion Report an error in the passage at 46:19
46:48 boutiques and you name it. Report an error in the passage at 46:48
46:53 Because it is quite a beautiful word, isn't it? Even in English, nibbāna, it sounds like it's quite a beautiful sound. And of course, in terms of, it seems to be the ultimate goal or the highest attainment in the way that we think. Report an error in the passage at 46:53
47:11 But also, you know, it's not a high state. It's not something that you attain. It's the reality. It's when you... You see for yourself ultimate reality, where the delusions that bind you to the conditioned realm have fallen away. And it's the reality of non-attachment to the conditioned realm, to the body, to the memories, the emotions, the world that we perceive and experience through the senses. Report an error in the passage at 47:11
48:01 Now, of course, the realization of nibbāna, when we think about it, it sounds very difficult. Report an error in the passage at 48:01
48:12 And there's books and commentaries and all kinds of things that make it all sound very complicated. And if you read too much, you'll only feel despair. Report an error in the passage at 48:12
48:25 It's too difficult. Because thinking and reading tend to complicate. difficult. Report an error in the passage at 48:25
48:33 Everything. You know, we project onto life, we analyze, criticize, we get even to refine discriminations and interest in the minutiae of a condition. And it goes on and on endlessly. In terms of the conditioned realm, one thing goes on to the next. So the only way to let go of the conditioned realm realm through awareness of it. Report an error in the passage at 48:33
49:33 We use words like going inward, look inside, because the worldly life is usually of always paying attention outside, being fascinated by the objects that we see, hear, smell, taste, touch. The way we get fascinated with our own thoughts, with our memories, is always going out to something. Report an error in the passage at 49:33
50:00 And so the general... Advice in the beginning of developing pavana is looking inward. So we tend to not gaze around and look at everything, but kind of hold our gaze down or close our eyes and become more aware of what's happening inside with the feelings of the body, the subtle feelings of the posture that we're in, the breathing. Report an error in the passage at 50:00
50:31 Or the sensations or the mood or mental state that we might be, that we're experiencing in the present. So it's a way of withdrawing our attention, our interest from going out towards going inward. So power now in the initial phases of beginning is to not go out but to go in. Because that's, very few people have that sense of going inward. Report an error in the passage at 50:31
51:04 And the society we live in is one definitely promoting outwardness, being fascinated, being interested, always seeking some distraction or something to do. Report an error in the passage at 51:04
51:17 And as we begin to pay attention inwardly, then we begin to notice just how feelings, emotions, memories arise and cease within us. And I never noticed that. If you're always going outward and... Going from one thing to the next, you don't notice the way it is. You develop habits and addictions to distraction. But in going inward, then, the subtleties of, just you begin to notice how physical, just the sense of physical sensation is in a continuous state of change. Report an error in the passage at 51:17
52:02 Or you're aware of subtle physical sensations you never noticed before, because You didn't notice your body until it was extremely pleasant or extremely painful. Report an error in the passage at 52:02
52:17 And in meditation you're noticing subtle sensations of just pressure or mood, of various moods of sadness or loneliness or despair or emotions oftentimes that we've... We've never allowed to consciously accept. Most of us experience quite strong emotional reactions sometimes in meditation because repressed anger or resentment start surfacing into consciousness because we're no longer resisting. Report an error in the passage at 52:17
52:59 But then as we see these in terms of dharma rather than interpreting in terms of some critical judgments we might form about Being angry or resentful, we begin to notice that it's changing us, that what arises ceases. And, of course, this is the patience, endurance of being able to stay with something even when it's boring or unwanted or painful. Report an error in the passage at 52:59
53:35 You begin to find a strength within this moment. That you may have never noticed before. Report an error in the passage at 53:35
53:46 And of course, this becomes stronger and stronger the more you trust in this centeredness of awareness, a stillness, or an unshakableness. When we're mindful, we're not just being caught in the movement and the power of the conditioned phenomena, we're actually resting in... Report an error in the passage at 53:46
54:12 the unconditioned reality or where all conditions arise and cease and so this is this you can't find you can't get behind that you can't objectify it you have just need to to recognize and that you recognize through awareness once Report an error in the passage at 54:12
54:35 you recognize that center then of course it you you know you you can forget it but Something has definitely changed, because after that point, it's like you've awakened, even though you may not have really noticed that you've awakened. Report an error in the passage at 54:35
55:00 Something has definitely become, or you've seen reality in a way that you've never noticed or observed it before. So it's easy to go back into the old patterns of of self-view and that, but generally after that moment of insight we find ourselves gravitating towards going on meditation retreats or becoming monks, nuns, things like that. Report an error in the passage at 55:00
55:29 This kind of inclination or moving towards solitude in some way, being a hermit or going off to India to an ashram or anything, you know, any kind of of kind of Report an error in the passage at 55:29
55:45 You know, you sense certain possibilities in various memories that you might have of how to develop. Report an error in the passage at 55:45
55:58 With me, it was moving into monastic life. When I sensed that, the opportunities seemed to open up through the Theravāda in Thailand. Report an error in the passage at 55:58
56:17 It seemed like once I decided to, everything began to open up for me. I met this very good teacher, Ajahn Chah, and soon after, and of course, then the conventional lifestyle that I chose was a supportive, was on the conventional level supportive. Its whole point is to support awareness. Report an error in the passage at 56:17
56:48 Not to attach to the convention itself, but to use the convention for awareness. Report an error in the passage at 56:48
57:01 Now in teaching, having lived in England now for so many years, and seeing the result and the amount of interest that people have in Buddhist meditation, in Buddhism, in Dhamma, and seeing the great need for it in this society. Because we find, you know, at this time, it's very confusing for us all on the conventional level. You know, life has never been more kind of easy, I think, for all of us. Report an error in the passage at 57:01
57:36 On the material plane, we have all kinds of incredible high-tech apparatus. Report an error in the passage at 57:36
57:48 Things are magical now. Somebody gave me one of these little computers for my birthday. You know, these kind of, they can do everything. And I can read the BBC News, New York Times, CNN. Report an error in the passage at 57:48
58:07 I can, I even have, somebody's even recorded a kind of dictionary into this computer. So I, you know, I'm just front. Probably the problem is learning how to use this thing. Probably next lecture I'll bring out my computer. I'll be thinking of a word and go like this. Report an error in the passage at 58:07
58:31 And it seems like, you know, every wish comes true. Everything you can imagine, you know, in your fantasy life is now possible to get almost instant result. Report an error in the passage at 58:31
58:44 So in terms of, you know, stable government, Democratic society, wealthy, a good economy, and all the rest. And yet, we find generally the society is confused. And that's everywhere. It's not just this one. Because we push the technical side of our intelligence. We've kind of made miracles out of manipulating the conditioned realm. Report an error in the passage at 58:44
59:22 To fit our desires. We've been incredibly clever in the past hundred years in developing modern science and technology to a high level. Report an error in the passage at 59:22
59:34 And so many of our, what were no problems, weren't problems for people a hundred years ago, now become great problems for us. People like road rage. And people, when their computers break down, go into rage. And things like that, people get depressed over the slightest thing now because, you know, one's attention has gone into high tech or into doing what you want. Report an error in the passage at 59:34
1:00:08 And when that's frustrated and you have to give up or wait or be patient, we've not developed these kind of qualities. Patient endurance is not a virtue that's been... inculcated into modern life. Report an error in the passage at 1:00:08
1:00:28 So then people come on meditation retreats and that's an interesting one because meditation retreats are really boring. You know, you go on for ten days. Report an error in the passage at 1:00:28
1:00:42 You're not supposed to talk. You take a vow of silence and you sit for hours with nothing to do but watch your breath. And you're not given a computer or anything to play with. You have to even give up, you know, listening to the radio or watching television. You know, you're not supposed to chit-chat or socialize. Report an error in the passage at 1:00:42
1:01:06 In fact, the whole point is that you have to be with yourself for ten days. And even though retreats have a lot of people on them, you know, the idea is not to use the time for socializing, but to go within. Report an error in the passage at 1:01:06
1:01:26 And these retreats are, you know, we have waiting lists of people wanting to go on a 10-day retreat, which is quite wonderful, isn't it? How people, you know, in their intuitive senses are recognizing the value of this. Learning to endure yourself is really good practice, and it helps to develop self-esteem, to know that you don't need all this distraction or all these things to... Report an error in the passage at 1:01:26
1:01:56 For your peace of mind or your happiness. Where if you don't challenge that, then we think, oh, if my computer breaks down or my car doesn't work and the central heating breaks down and my life is just ruined, you know. Everything's crashing around me and we can feel a whole sense of security. A sense of security is falling apart, and that's very frightening. And then people get very upset because now they're like, stability, say, in marriage relationships. Report an error in the passage at 1:01:56
1:02:36 And all these are, it's no longer, there's no social pressure anymore to stay married. You know, as soon as you get tired of each other, you can go off and find somebody else. Report an error in the passage at 1:02:36
1:02:51 It used to be more difficult to do that. The social pressure would be much stronger, but now there isn't. So you can. You don't have to develop a kind of endurance or patience in your life because the society we live in doesn't encourage that. In fact, it's more instant. Like this little computer, you don't even have to push a button. You just touch the screen like that. Report an error in the passage at 1:02:51
1:03:25 I remember the old typewriters, we had to press down the keys. Now that's too much. So it Report an error in the passage at 1:03:25
1:03:42 is amazing, and it's not that I'm criticizing it, because I'm quite impressed with technology. But also, we recognize that in any conditioned experience, it also has its dark side. It has its bright side and its dark side. Report an error in the passage at 1:03:42
1:04:13 change and unpredictability and insecurity. And that's where, if we seek that, seek security in the insecure, we're only going to be disappointed despairing. Report an error in the passage at 1:04:13
1:04:29 In the fact that this is becoming so apparent and evident to many of you, you know, your interest in, say, developing other qualities, like meditation retreats, definitely developing patient endurance. Report an error in the passage at 1:04:29
1:04:46 You know, the first time I ever went on a ten-day retreat, you know, thinking about it beforehand, like a ten-day retreat and ten days of sitting, you know. And then they'd allow you to walk, but then you had to walk very slowly for ten days. Just the thought of that, ten days of that, I decided I better not think about it because the kind of anxiety that arose was more than I could bear. Report an error in the passage at 1:04:46
1:05:20 But the actual reality of it was quite amazing, what happened to me during that time. You know, I couldn't have predicted it or... Oh, you know, it wasn't something that I was expecting at all. But the ten days went by very quickly. Where before, you know, before I started, ten days, ten day retreat sounded like eternity. Report an error in the passage at 1:05:20
1:05:51 You know, not talking for ten days and sitting and just looking at your breath for ten days. It sounded like I'd be so bored and I'd just be waiting. Sitting there, you know, because I'm proud. Also, I'm not going to give up. I'm not going to leave. I'm going to prove I can do it. And there's a certain amount of pride and willfulness. But after a while, that doesn't work very well either. That kind of falls apart. Report an error in the passage at 1:05:51
1:06:22 And then I found out the real insight came was when I stopped trying. After all the pride and effort and willfulness, I couldn't keep it going. Then suddenly something shifted and began to see things in a different way. Report an error in the passage at 1:06:22
1:06:48 So now it's time for tea and this selflessness, selfishness, self-esteem. These are words, English word self. It's quite a powerful word in its own right. And so this is how it affects you, you know, to... To yourself, myself, selfish, selfless, self-esteem. One of the complaints many people have now is a lack of self-esteem. Report an error in the passage at 1:06:48
1:07:24 They don't appreciate themselves or their own goodness or their own beauty. The tendency for so many of us is to dwell on our weaknesses or faults or what we think is wrong with us. That's the way the critical mind works. It tends to pick up on the flaw, the blemish, and say, that's me. I shouldn't have that. You get fixated on the blemish, then you forget the rest. So this is like a lack of self-esteem. Report an error in the passage at 1:07:24
1:08:04 It's just not taking into account the whole picture. Report an error in the passage at 1:08:04
1:08:15 much importance and attention to the blemish you recognize the goodness you know, the generosity the goodness of your life the beauty, the aspiration and all these other virtues that we all have but we sometimes don't Appreciate or recognize because of the tendency to be self-critical. So today's talk is an invitation, encouragement to begin to really be honest about yourself, not in terms of admitting all your faults because you're probably very good at that already, but beginning to look, notice, really and make more conscious, you know, the goodness, the beauty. Report an error in the passage at 1:08:15
1:09:36 The helpers from Rumpai are all there making tea that we can enjoy for the next half hour. And then after that, if you're interested, you can assemble and you can have a discussion on this subject. Report an error in the passage at 1:09:36
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Talk by Ajahn Sumedho. Original at Amaravati Buddhist Monastery via Internet Archive: https://archive.org/details/ajahn-sumedho-dhamma-talks. Licensed CC BY-NC-ND 4.0. Transcript generated automatically and may contain errors; the audio is the authoritative version.
Talks of Ajahn Sumedho, archived on Internet Archive. More from Amaravati