Right Intention

0:00 This is what should be done by one who is skilled in goodness and who knows the path of peace. Let them be able and upright, straightforward and gentle in speech, humble and not conceited, contented and easily satisfied, not burdened with duties and frugal in their ways. Peaceful and calm and wise and skillful, not proud or demanding in nature. Let them not do the slightest thing that the wise would later reprove. Report an error in the passage at 0:00 Highlight the passage at 0:00

0:38 Wishing in gladness and in safety, may all beings be happy. Whatever living beings there may be, whether they are weak or strong, omitting none. The great and mighty, the medium, short or small, the seen and the unseen, those living near and far away, those born and to be born, may all beings be happy. Report an error in the passage at 0:38 Highlight the passage at 0:38

1:08 Let none deceive another or despise any being in any state. Let none through anger or ill will wish harm upon another. Report an error in the passage at 1:08 Highlight the passage at 1:08

1:55 this recollection this should this is said to be the sublime abiding By not holding to fixed views, a pure-hearted one, having clarity of vision, being free from all sense desires, is not born again into this world. Report an error in the passage at 1:55 Highlight the passage at 1:55

2:19 So Report an error in the passage at 2:19 Highlight the passage at 2:19

2:24 hopefully I was pretty close to the mark or from memory. So we live in interesting times as always. And one of the interesting things about the world today In Buddhism generally, is that interestingly, we've never had it easier to practice. We've never had better access to texts, to teachings. The internet is full of fantastic talks and guided meditations and all kinds of resources available to help us practice. Report an error in the passage at 2:24 Highlight the passage at 2:24

2:56 But there's still things that we don't really touch on that often that don't really kind of make it that useful to us. It's still quite abstract and distant and... At times just, shall we say, optimistic that might not seem practical in today's world. But ironically, the more challenging things are, the easier it is to practice. Report an error in the passage at 2:56 Highlight the passage at 2:56

3:20 And it's always been that way. And a lot of the things that are so important is understanding right intention. And right intention comes in three distinct forms. The first one is nekama. which is the renunciation the letting go living more simply both simply in how we live in the world but also simply how we interact with the world to not have to complicate it with our agendas and vested interests and all these expectations and hopes and fears and dreams and all the things that make life just so complicated and then we have a wayapada which means the the compassion the kindness that comes in Which is really, really important. And of course, ahimsaka, meaning not causing any harm. And connected with those. Report an error in the passage at 3:20 Highlight the passage at 3:20

4:17 When you take them one by one, they're really, really beautiful ideas. But when it comes to putting them in place, it's sometimes really, really difficult. We live in a chaotic world. We live in a world where there's so many pressures. Cost of living crisis hasn't gone away. In many cases it's gone worse for many parts of the world and so on and so many conflicts and people in positions of power saying one thing and promising other things and chaos and chaos and chaos. Report an error in the passage at 4:17 Highlight the passage at 4:17

4:48 In many ways it's always been that way but perhaps now more than ever because of the internet and constant news feeds we can't escape it. It's in our face all the time. So how do we cope in that particular situation? Report an error in the passage at 4:48 Highlight the passage at 4:48

5:03 And a lot of it is looking at, well, there's the old saying that in war, the first casualty is truth. It's an old saying. But in the same way, when there's greed in the world, the first casualty is nekama, the renunciation. When there's ill will in the world, the first casualty of that is ahimsaka, not causing any harm. And when delusion is in the world, the first casualty... Report an error in the passage at 5:03 Highlight the passage at 5:03

5:35 is compassion. Because the ego cannot ever actually know compassion. It's a boundless state which means straight away it can't be self and other. It's a state where the self is basically dissolved for that moment and there's just the compassion spreading boundlessly. The loving kindness spreading boundlessly. Report an error in the passage at 5:35 Highlight the passage at 5:35

5:56 The joy spreading boundlessly. And the upeka, the contentment or the acceptance. We don't really have a great word for it in English, but, you know, that peaceful state, boundless, without condition. And this is kind of the difficulty, but also the benefit, because when we look at it the other way, when you start practicing right intention, greed, hatred and delusion dissipate. Report an error in the passage at 5:56 Highlight the passage at 5:56

6:28 They disappear. And it's often a point of relevance and a point of priority. Which is a better way to live? And a big part of that is implication. And we don't really talk so much about implication in Buddhism, but it's a major, major part of the practice itself. Report an error in the passage at 6:28 Highlight the passage at 6:28

6:50 If everything is impermanent, what is the implication for living a good life? When everything is, you know, slipping through our fingers and we work really hard on the rat race just to get these tokenistic pleasures, which advertisers promise so much and yet... Deliver so little. Is it worth chasing these things? Are they really going to make a difference in our lives, in our family, in our community, in our society and so on? Report an error in the passage at 6:50 Highlight the passage at 6:50

7:20 Is it going to make a difference? When there is dukkha, what is the implication of that for living a good life? Surely it is logical and compassionate to choose what is not suffering. Report an error in the passage at 7:20 Highlight the passage at 7:20

7:35 And yet we seldom do. More often than not, we rush into suffering Because we feel it gives us security. It's a really odd one to reflect on. We choose security when really what it causes is just more suffering. And then we try to get security from suffering, which means we chase more suffering. Report an error in the passage at 7:35 Highlight the passage at 7:35

8:03 Once we start investigating that one, the logic of it doesn't really stack up. But the implication has to come in sort of saying, when this doesn't work, the solution becomes obvious. We can't continue doing this. Report an error in the passage at 8:03 Highlight the passage at 8:03

8:17 And of course, anattā as well, when things are non-self, what is the implication in that for living a good life? When all these things that we believe are ours and must be defended at all costs, when they aren't really that ours at all. We're just using them for the time being. We're just here and this is the stuff we have. But eventually it returns back to wherever they came from. Report an error in the passage at 8:17 Highlight the passage at 8:17

8:44 Solids, liquids, gases, energy and all that. So what is the implication in that for living a good life? And these things start to become more interesting because these are things that you don't have to be a monastic to do. These are kind of mechanisms that everybody can use for choosing what is more beneficial, more wholesome choices. Because choices are everywhere. Report an error in the passage at 8:44 Highlight the passage at 8:44

9:08 We have lots of them. And when we have too many of them, our mind becomes overburdened. We can't choose easily. We want more information or quite often we don't have time for more information or if we do get more information, it's even more confusing. So we're feeling more pressured, more claustrophobic in our lives. But these choices still have to be made. We still have to live our lives. Report an error in the passage at 9:08 Highlight the passage at 9:08

9:34 If you spend forever in bed just hiding under the blankets, well, life isn't really worth living. that is beautiful in this world, so much that really teaches us what does it mean to be human and what does it mean to live a good life? How can we live together? Report an error in the passage at 9:34 Highlight the passage at 9:34

9:55 because this is also the question when we look at the implication of the Buddha's teachings the Four Noble Truths and so on dependent origination all these things the implication of them is really quite direct Report an error in the passage at 9:55 Highlight the passage at 9:55

10:09 there's just no point doing what doesn't work there's no point in Chasing after things that are only going to make us miserable, that are only going to harm us more. When we want to be happy, when we want to be healthy and living a good life and we'd be hard-pressed to find someone who isn't looking for those things, then what is the way forward? Report an error in the passage at 10:09 Highlight the passage at 10:09

10:34 Should we continue chasing after our habitual ways of doing things? But why do we want these habitual ways of doing things? Why are we attracted to them? Because we believe they give us security. They're familiar. And times they have given us comfort. And we've made an association that because it gave us comfort then, it will always give us comfort. But things are inconsistent. Report an error in the passage at 10:34 Highlight the passage at 10:34

10:59 Things are impermanent. They're not always going to give us the same happiness. We can become acclimatized or adapted to them. And then we need more of what it is. Report an error in the passage at 10:59 Highlight the passage at 10:59

11:12 There's times that just watching a comedy or a nice show or a movie on the TV was good enough. Then all of a sudden it isn't good enough. We need a better sound system. Then we need a bigger screen. Then we need a better home cinema. And then even that's not good enough. And it builds up and builds up and builds up. And the more that we experience things, the less that they mean anything to us. Report an error in the passage at 11:12 Highlight the passage at 11:12

11:35 We've got it so good in some ways, it's meaningless. And yet we're still looking for happiness. And how are we going to find happiness in these things which are meaningless to us? And this is the thing. We often have to change our mindset. We have to look a little deeper into things. We have to consider the implication that when we're constantly looking for security in things that will never give us security, is this a logical thing to do? Report an error in the passage at 11:35 Highlight the passage at 11:35

12:06 Is this a compassionate thing to do? When the things we're chasing after can cause so much harm both to ourselves and to other people, is it worth holding on to? Is it worth killing over? It really isn't. And this is the thing with Anitta as well. We're trying to navigate the world and the ego does a really good job at that. This I, me, mine, you, us, ours, all these pronouns that we use, all these little ways that we label things and are able to navigate the world. Report an error in the passage at 12:06 Highlight the passage at 12:06

12:41 That works great. But is it something that's solid and real and that needs to be defended at all costs? Report an error in the passage at 12:41 Highlight the passage at 12:41

12:53 Maybe it isn't. Maybe it's just a process of the mind, just an idea. Have we created all this chaos in the world over just an idea? Report an error in the passage at 12:53 Highlight the passage at 12:53

13:06 Perhaps we have. So looking at the implication of these things with right intention actually shows us the way forward really is not that complicated. Report an error in the passage at 13:06 Highlight the passage at 13:06

13:19 The world isn't going to give us anything more than what we already have. It's not going to make us any more human. And at the same time, all the terrible stuff that we go through, all the difficult situations, the challenges, the losses, the betrayals, all the propaganda and the lies and the greed and the spin and so on and so on, are not going to make us any less human than we are. Report an error in the passage at 13:19 Highlight the passage at 13:19

13:46 They can't take those things away from us because there's no difference there. And that's a very comforting thing to understand. Report an error in the passage at 13:46 Highlight the passage at 13:46

13:56 You're never going to be more human than you already are. You've already got all the abilities that you need to be happy. You've already got all the abilities to develop the mind, to live a beautiful life, to live a good life, to enjoy things even when they're so crazy, even when technology breaks down and doesn't work, when societies break down and don't work, when families break down and don't work, and marriages break down and don't work. Report an error in the passage at 13:56 Highlight the passage at 13:56

14:31 You know. There's no guarantees, but it's what we do with them that counts. Really, what intention are we bringing to the party? What are we bringing to the moment? Report an error in the passage at 14:31 Highlight the passage at 14:31

14:47 If we're always bringing something beautiful into the moment, that makes a difference. It makes life meaningful. The challenge is though, mostly in the West, we've been brought up to be very suspicious of this. Report an error in the passage at 14:47 Highlight the passage at 14:47

15:06 Because it sounds all happy, happy, joy, joy, or, you know, just spin and make everything all nicey, nicey, nicey. And to be sure, and of course, if you, having lived at Bodhinyana for so long, you know, I've seen this myself many times, people who create this artificial happiness, constantly making everything lovely and inspiring and fun, and it's a very artificial world. Report an error in the passage at 15:06 Highlight the passage at 15:06

15:30 And it's a very brittle world when the real life conditions come in. Report an error in the passage at 15:30 Highlight the passage at 15:30

16:07 just by put making hap..happiness Putting a good light on things. Is that artificial? It can be. But it doesn't have to be. And that's the difference. In recognizing things as they are and bringing in right intention and understanding the implication of the Buddha's teachings, all of a sudden we're from a position where it's logical and it's rational and it's compassionate and it's helpful for us to understand the world as it is. Report an error in the passage at 16:07 Highlight the passage at 16:07

16:41 And of course, this is a challenge. Sometimes it's a scary, horrible picture. How do we implicate? How do we integrate with that? Sometimes there's just so much stuff. All we want to do is hide under the blankets and pretend it doesn't exist. And there's times, ironically, we actually need to do that. Report an error in the passage at 16:41 Highlight the passage at 16:41

17:00 If we can't bear, if we can't manage all this information, there's times that we have to switch off, that we have to go into our rooms or go on a retreat. Go walking in the bush or go on holiday somewhere else where you can disconnect from all this stuff going on to reconnect to ourselves, to the present moment, to life as a whole. Report an error in the passage at 17:00 Highlight the passage at 17:00

17:28 So that's perfectly fine. It's the subtlety between creating an artificial solution, manufacturing an artificial world in which is a happy, happy dream. Report an error in the passage at 17:28 Highlight the passage at 17:28

17:43 But it breaks. The real world comes in. And what do we do? And at the same time, we know the opposite is true. Many of us have been there, where we've become cynical and embittered and angry and hostile to everything. And we build up the idea that we know everything that's going on. And well, it just basically makes us fair game and prey to the algorithms, really. Report an error in the passage at 17:43 Highlight the passage at 17:43

18:15 into, into the trap of information and misinformation. There's no solution there. So a lot of it is really coming back to the present moment, being mindful. And that often means delighting in being mindful, just that simplicity, reflecting that if we weren't mindful, if we weren't reconnecting with ourselves, reconnecting with each other. Report an error in the passage at 18:15 Highlight the passage at 18:15

18:42 Taking a moment to breathe, taking a moment to look at the sky and, you know, flowers if they're around. If you're in a city and you're in a concrete jungle, well, find something else to look at that can help you reconnect with the present moment. Report an error in the passage at 18:42 Highlight the passage at 18:42

18:57 And how does that make us feel better, feel more centered? Because really this whole insecurity problem is just the fact that we can't reconcile all stuff that's going on. We can't reconcile the fact that everything is impermanent. And changing and inconsistent. We can't reconcile the fact that there is dukkha in the world, the first noble truth. We can't reconcile the fact that it's all anattā. Report an error in the passage at 18:57 Highlight the passage at 18:57

19:27 And that's where they come together. If we can't reconcile these, if we can't consider the implications and we can't integrate them, Buddhism doesn't help us at all. Report an error in the passage at 19:27 Highlight the passage at 19:27

19:42 And it's always been like that. The Buddha was really clear it's always been like that. The Buddha points the way. You yourself have to do the work that he describes. The teaching like a medicine and it's no good just reading the prescription. You have to take the medicine. You have to take the healing practices that the doctor prescribes. Report an error in the passage at 19:42 Highlight the passage at 19:42

20:04 And a lot of it is very comforting. A lot of it is very, it helps us navigate things which are really, really challenging. That when we see the world crumbling around us and getting more chaotic and everything else and the people around us, none of us are getting any younger. Report an error in the passage at 20:04 Highlight the passage at 20:04

20:24 So we can just enjoy it more because we know that it's fragile. This is Ajahn Chah's old story where he held up the glass and sort of said, this glass looks like in good condition, but there's a crack already in it. And the fact that there's a crack in it means that it is precious because now we can use it and value it knowing that it is inevitable that it will break. Report an error in the passage at 20:24 Highlight the passage at 20:24

20:51 It is already broken. And that is not a disaster. That's not a problem. In fact, it quite honestly makes it more comforting. It changes our priorities now because the implication of this is that we make the best with what we have. The days and nights are relentlessly passing. How well am I spending my time? There's a classic saying often that monastics are required to reflect on. Report an error in the passage at 20:51 Highlight the passage at 20:51

21:26 But it's in there. And again, it's a good one. None of us are getting any younger. What is the best way that we can spend our time? What is the best way that we can live a good life? Report an error in the passage at 21:26 Highlight the passage at 21:26

21:40 And a lot of the time we can't choose our relationships. We can't choose our jobs. We can't choose the social situation we're in or the conflicts and the goods and the bads and all the rest of it. We can't choose these things. We can't control them. And quite a lot of the time we can't control... But the fact is that our perception of the world is a conditioned phenomena. Report an error in the passage at 21:40 Highlight the passage at 21:40

22:28 We've been believing certain things, seeing the way at the world in certain ways for so long. We're habitually programmed to do so. So we, seeing the implication of that, seeing it is possible to change our mind, change how we see the world, but we're so stuck in these habit patterns. Report an error in the passage at 22:28 Highlight the passage at 22:28

22:47 It means that we are prepared to give ourselves time and space. We're prepared to take things a little more slowly in a way. It's okay to make mistakes. It's okay if we fall into these old depressing patterns. It's okay if we get frustrated at these things that we know better because it's what we've been doing for so long. Report an error in the passage at 22:47 Highlight the passage at 22:47

23:08 But it is still possible to change. And it is still possible to grow from these challenging situations. And certainly challenging situations are everywhere. Report an error in the passage at 23:08 Highlight the passage at 23:08

23:21 The thing is that, you know, as Ajahn Brahm used to say, the, you know, If you step in a dog poo, you scrape it off on your tree, it's good fertilizer. A lot of the time, if we have a truckload of dung dumped on the tree, well, you're going to kill the tree. You're going to give it nitrogen burn. And so a little bit, you have to be the good gardener, so to speak, to know what the plant needs. Report an error in the passage at 23:21 Highlight the passage at 23:21

23:50 And by developing your practice, you can become the good gardener of your life, to know there's times you need a break, to know there's times to lift the mind up. To calm it down, there's times you need to break, there's times you need to be a bit more engaged perhaps, to be more interested in new things that will help you grow. Report an error in the passage at 23:50 Highlight the passage at 23:50

24:11 And a lot of the times what's really fascinating is these things unfold quite naturally. It's not some grand cosmic plan or anything like that. It's all that if you put the causes into place, the conditions unfold on their own. And so if you're inclined towards learning new things, You're more open to new things that are going to come anyway. And you can see things in a more beneficial way. And that's always something which is, I think it's always told to us, but we interpret it as something that we do. Report an error in the passage at 24:11 Highlight the passage at 24:11

24:49 So we try these things. We try them as a way of, perhaps as a life hack for a better word. And we try them and they don't really work and then we give up on them. When realistically, they're more a result of understanding. And that's how the Eightfold Path is actually set up. Report an error in the passage at 24:49 Highlight the passage at 24:49

25:12 At the beginning, some traditions call it mundane and super mundane. They have different words for it. But at the beginning, the right view we have is going to be intellectual. It's just going to be stuff we've read and going, oh yeah, this makes sense. It's not real experience yet. But you've read the text. Report an error in the passage at 25:12 Highlight the passage at 25:12

25:31 You can recite. The Four Noble Truths or certain teachings of the Buddha and things like that, and you can remember them. And that's helpful. Report an error in the passage at 25:31 Highlight the passage at 25:31

25:41 And the more we do that, the more and more we can see that when we connect our understanding, our intellectual education, to the things that are happening around us, as well as the things that are happening inside us, then all of a sudden we can see more clearly the implication of right view. is tied to right intention. Because when we see with right view, there is impermanence, there is dukkha, suffering, unpleasantness, dissatisfaction, all those words. Report an error in the passage at 25:41 Highlight the passage at 25:41

26:17 There is anattā. What is the implication of living a good life? And straight away, right intention comes in because these are the only things that make sense. These are the only things that work. You can try it all. And from right intention, right speech falls into place. Report an error in the passage at 26:17 Highlight the passage at 26:17

26:38 Right action falls into place. There's just no benefit in chasing after these things that just don't work, that have just failed to help us. And then we have all the rest of the path, right effort, right livelihood, right mindfulness and so on. The rest of these things, they just come together all from right view. Report an error in the passage at 26:38 Highlight the passage at 26:38

27:01 So in this sense, seeing the implication of the Buddha's teachings, asking these questions. Really does help our practice in a way that we just don't pick up on, say, just reading a book or even going to a weekend retreat or anything like that. We just get taught the basics. And a lot of the time, that's all we can really talk about. It's difficult to have a deep and meaningful conversation in such a limited time. Report an error in the passage at 27:01 Highlight the passage at 27:01

27:34 We need to know that person for a long time before we can approach these conversations. It's the same for all of us. And so, in this sense, what is the implication of the world around us? What is the implication of what's going on in our homes, in our heart and our head and everything else inside us? Report an error in the passage at 27:34 Highlight the passage at 27:34

27:57 What is the implication of how to live a good life? And so, been going on for nearly half an hour. Shall we jump into a meditation? Report an error in the passage at 27:57 Highlight the passage at 27:57

28:15 I guess that means yes. Okay, everybody, please stand up. Give yourself a bit of a shake. Adjust your clothes, adjust your chair or adjust your cushion and do all the things you need to do. Report an error in the passage at 28:15 Highlight the passage at 28:15

28:46 And when you're ready, please close your eyes. And Report an error in the passage at 28:46 Highlight the passage at 28:46

29:07 let's focus on our meditation for right intention. So let's start with the compassion, the settling down, relaxing. Report an error in the passage at 29:07 Highlight the passage at 29:07

29:27 Let's bring in a little bit of naekama, putting aside all that stuff, all the stuff that made us busy today, all the troubles, all the worries. Report an error in the passage at 29:27 Highlight the passage at 29:27

29:40 Let's just put those aside for the moment. And Report an error in the passage at 29:40 Highlight the passage at 29:40

30:09 as we relax, think about ahimsaka, not causing any harm. How do we meditate not causing any harm? By Report an error in the passage at 30:09 Highlight the passage at 30:09

30:27 relaxing. By making ourselves comfortable. By getting all this stuff sorted at the beginning. Report an error in the passage at 30:27 Highlight the passage at 30:27

30:39 Settling in. Report an error in the passage at 30:39 Highlight the passage at 30:39

· · · silence, 1 minute

31:18 It doesn't matter if you're focusing on your breathing. It doesn't matter if you're focusing on your body. On your sensations. Whatever works. Report an error in the passage at 31:18 Highlight the passage at 31:18

31:46 You can use all your favourite techniques or methods, the things that you enjoy, to make your meditation beautiful. When Report an error in the passage at 31:46 Highlight the passage at 31:46

· · · silence, 26 minutes

58:08 you're ready, you can open your eyes. And Report an error in the passage at 58:08 Highlight the passage at 58:08

58:19 if there are any questions, please dive in. Unfortunately, because I can't see you, if anybody has hands up, please just dive in. Because otherwise I won't know. I Report an error in the passage at 58:19 Highlight the passage at 58:19

58:38 have a question. Of course, go for it. Yes, so I was like... I was exploring about like my defense mechanism and like how to say my like my difficulties my genuine difficulty in putting putting it down when I interact with other people like regardless of whether they are very good friends because in the past I always have this this kind of thing it's like I would be with my friend and then after be with them for a very long time when I left I just felt very very tired and then I just don't know why because I was like they're my friend and I like them like genuinely but after like every interaction I would just feel really tired afterwards and then I recently started to realize it's probably because I just put I put up my defense like unconsciously and then I don't know it's just like I I probably was not like really really expressing myself but I think there was like but then when I tried to like understand about myself I felt like there's like I really hate myself for being vulnerable and like I don't like myself like being weak and I think there is like a big part of it but like Report an error in the passage at 58:38 Highlight the passage at 58:38

1:00:15 I think it's also like I was not as like how to say I was not as stable as what I put in front of other people because a lot of the time it's like I will have this kind of feeling I really I really want to cry or like I really can't do it but like I would try to like I would try to hide those things like unconsciously because I felt like other people would not receive it very well so I would just like oh I'm fine or stuff but like Report an error in the passage at 1:00:15 Highlight the passage at 1:00:15

1:00:54 yeah and I don't know I don't know how to I don't know how to accept my vulnerability so it's really hard for me in a sense Report an error in the passage at 1:00:54 Highlight the passage at 1:00:54

1:01:08 No, this is actually a very, very big one. It's actually something that affects most of us, especially since we More or less, the modern culture has been the fake it till you make it approach. So it's kind of put on a good face, put on the facade, make everything look happy, happy, happy. And as I said before, it's a very artificial and very brittle world, but it's exhausting. And the problem is that we can't show this side of ourselves to other people because we're afraid that they can't accept it or understand it. Report an error in the passage at 1:01:08 Highlight the passage at 1:01:08

1:01:46 Or they'll take advantage of it. And the fact that we're constantly putting on a face, it's exhausting. And the problem is we end up hating ourselves because we're living an artificial life. We're not really living up to our potential, to our own happiness, to our own intelligence and so on. And this is a very major thing in modern people. Report an error in the passage at 1:01:46 Highlight the passage at 1:01:46

1:02:14 I've lost count. How many people that they go on a retreat and eventually they come and they say, you know, sometimes they're very happy with the discovery, but sometimes they're horrified with the discovery, is that they hate themselves. Report an error in the passage at 1:02:14 Highlight the passage at 1:02:14

1:02:28 And that's not really sort of a disaster, actually. It's more of a realization that the entire world that we've been living, the habitual ways that we've been doing, the facades, the conventions, the good manners and all the rest of it, are artificial. Report an error in the passage at 1:02:28 Highlight the passage at 1:02:28

1:03:11 It's actually a very, very good line of investigation to have is that understanding that because there's that sense that, you know, being tired even with your good friends and having to basically perform and not show your vulnerabilities or other sides like that is actually a really good understanding because straight away we can see the implication of that. Report an error in the passage at 1:03:11 Highlight the passage at 1:03:11

1:03:36 As we were saying before, the compassion can come in. They're deciding, no, this isn't really going to work. And at the same time, we can be mindful that other people are doing exactly the same thing we are. We're all putting on a facade, a face, trying to make everything look like it's under control and, you know, the amount of stuff people put on social media, you know, to make it look like they're living a perfect life. Report an error in the passage at 1:03:36 Highlight the passage at 1:03:36

1:04:03 And it's all artificial. But people, yeah. Report an error in the passage at 1:04:03 Highlight the passage at 1:04:03

1:04:10 I just want to say and I always feel this and maybe because of like my background of like um I would I do not want to say that but I do feel like and my I do feel like I was required to be emotionally stable like when I function in the world which is actually very like for like very tiring for me. Because I have like a very big emotional reactions to things because of my nervous system build up from the thing that I have experienced before. Report an error in the passage at 1:04:10 Highlight the passage at 1:04:10

1:04:56 And then sometimes I will always feel this kind of like, like I will feel the thing trigger me and then I have no other choice but to hide it. And then I also felt like Report an error in the passage at 1:04:56 Highlight the passage at 1:04:56

1:05:13 I also felt like I like I have to yeah I just constantly feel this pressure like I have to be emotionally stable like I cannot I cannot scream at people like I need to be emotional composed and I need to be emotionally emotionally, not really available, but like emotionally composed and emotionally stable in general. Report an error in the passage at 1:05:13 Highlight the passage at 1:05:13

1:05:49 And yeah, I don't know. I really don't know. But like, I just, I just, I just don't know how. I feel like, I feel like I have difficulty like living in a society sometimes. Yeah, because there's a price to be paid for it, isn't there? When we really consider it. The requirements to be emotionally composed and everything else. And monastics go through this a lot. As we know, when monastics are in public, they're always expected to have the facade and to have the robes perfectly straight and all the rest of it. Report an error in the passage at 1:05:49 Highlight the passage at 1:05:49

1:06:26 But to do that all the time is exhausting. To do that in society and in our families all the time is exhausting because we're living up to somebody else's measurement of who we should be. And traditionally... The kind of ways that people have gotten around that is through art, through expression, through poetry and writing and sculpture and painting and so on and so on are fantastic for that because you can express in ways which, you know, that we can't often do in public. Report an error in the passage at 1:06:26 Highlight the passage at 1:06:26

1:07:01 And that's the limitations of our societies. That's the limitations of our culture is, you know, but it's a big wake up to see. how many other people are doing exactly the same thing how many other people are hiding the chaos the you know the fact that they just want to go and scream at somebody or go into a corner and scream generally Report an error in the passage at 1:07:01 Highlight the passage at 1:07:01

1:07:25 It's a lot more common than we'd like to experience. At the same time, we can see this is why there's so many mental health problems in the world because, well, at least mental health is in stress and things like that because we have all these pressures and pent-up stuff while having to fit into work life, family life, this image that's often sold to us through advertising and magazines and media and it's all artificial. Report an error in the passage at 1:07:25 Highlight the passage at 1:07:25

1:07:56 Yeah, I think I sometimes, because in Hong Kong it's like... there's so many people and then sometimes i will like they're they're men or women they will like get triggered over a very small thing and suddenly they will like explode and then they will like screaming at each other and stuff and then i felt like and then the i would feel like like people really really really are under lots of pressure in general i think we can i don't know we have we can have more of like that kind of room that people can just go in and scream at the wall Well, it certainly would be a good thing in many ways. But again, it's fascinating to see the implication of what happens in a society when everybody has to, the moment they leave their apartments and are out in public, they have to be perfectly dressed and perfect facade and, you know, elegant and whatever's and socially fashionable and so on. Report an error in the passage at 1:07:56 Highlight the passage at 1:07:56

1:08:56 And at the same time, they just... You can see how it builds up and you can say, yep, that makes sense. Report an error in the passage at 1:08:56 Highlight the passage at 1:08:56

1:09:10 I need to be more socially derailed. Thank you for your advice. No problem. Hope it helps. Report an error in the passage at 1:09:10 Highlight the passage at 1:09:10

1:09:25 I'm always wondering if I'm faking it, you know, the whole ill will thing. When you think about it, everyone around me is angry and deluded too, so maybe it's not just me. It's a big one. In fact, the moment you start sort of pulling that little thread, the more and more you see, which is a wonderful thing about Buddhism. As I was having this conversation with the monk who was looking after the text earlier, the wonderful thing about this causality of Buddhism is that it all makes sense. Report an error in the passage at 1:09:25 Highlight the passage at 1:09:25

1:09:57 It isn't necessarily a pretty picture, but you look and going, Ah, this all makes sense now. You know, you can kind of see that everybody is suffering from the same stuff and some of them are dealing with it in wholesome ways, some of them are not dealing with it at all, but they're required to be socially with that facade and it's just a price is being paid for it and we don't even know it's happening. Report an error in the passage at 1:09:57 Highlight the passage at 1:09:57

1:10:24 So being mindful in that one is a real... Not only very comforting, but very liberating and very empowering because all of a sudden we can see, okay, the pressure is building up in here and in here. We can find a wholesome outlet for that, whether it's going for a walk in a park or art or dance or whatever it is that, or yeah, going off into a padded room and screaming for a bit, if it helps. Report an error in the passage at 1:10:24 Highlight the passage at 1:10:24

1:10:52 Thank Report an error in the passage at 1:10:52 Highlight the passage at 1:10:52

1:10:58 you, Vantay. This was really helpful. I don't think I've ever heard anybody just talk about this like this in all the classes that I've attended. It's amazing. While Gloria was speaking, I had flashbacks to my childhood. I was considered extremely rebellious and energetic as a child and they put me in every activity to occupy my mind and I therefore I fell into the fine arts through college and was trained in theater, art and ballet and modern dance and all that. Report an error in the passage at 1:10:58 Highlight the passage at 1:10:58

1:11:40 So I always had an outlet, but I was always just, I was fine with people one-on-one, but the minute there were two, I felt, oh good, I have an audience. You know, it wasn't, oh, I'm going to communicate. It was, oh, I have to entertain all these people. And I still feel that pressure immensely today at 73 and I'm exhausted. You know, I can't keep entertaining everybody. Report an error in the passage at 1:11:40 Highlight the passage at 1:11:40

1:12:11 Luckily, I quit drinking. So there's a lot less shenanigans in my life and I'm so grateful for that. You know, I did some damage, but hey, the damage is done and the memories are there. Most of them are good. Report an error in the passage at 1:12:11 Highlight the passage at 1:12:11

1:12:29 But I remember as a child being so angry at all the adults because I said to myself, why are they all lying? You know, they were all lying to each other because I was so observant. I was so bright and I just couldn't believe them, you know? Report an error in the passage at 1:12:29 Highlight the passage at 1:12:29

1:12:59 I didn't really know which direction to go to. But luckily, after all's said and done, I had a great curiosity being in the arts for religion and languages. So I'm not an expert in anything by any means. It's the proverbial jack of all trades, master of none, you know? Report an error in the passage at 1:12:59 Highlight the passage at 1:12:59

1:13:24 That's my biggest accomplishment right there. My husband just woke up. But yeah, it was quite a journey to learn the non-harmfulness and the correct speech and the Eightfold Path because I had a lot of damage done to my whole being in my behavior. So I had to learn how to uncondition myself and learn how to try to be really present. Report an error in the passage at 1:13:24 Highlight the passage at 1:13:24

1:13:57 And it's not my responsibility. to entertain anybody anymore or to behave in a certain way just to just find that stillness flowing like Ajahn Chah you know his main uh way Report an error in the passage at 1:13:57 Highlight the passage at 1:13:57

1:14:17 of uh uh putting forth the dharma you know um you still flow with the world and the life what you have to do but in a still Report an error in the passage at 1:14:17 Highlight the passage at 1:14:17

1:14:33 um way and without so much doubt yeah Report an error in the passage at 1:14:33 Highlight the passage at 1:14:33

1:14:43 Just be me. Report an error in the passage at 1:14:43 Highlight the passage at 1:14:43

1:14:48 I don't know. It's still a work in progress. So it's still a lot to do. But thank you. It was great talk and meditation. Thank you so much. Thank you. It's one of the big journeys as such is to discover. Just how much conditioning we've had. And in many ways it's conditioning that we've all kind of had because we've been pushed in social conventions and expectations of that time and of that place. Report an error in the passage at 1:14:48 Highlight the passage at 1:14:48

1:15:19 But the more and more we look at it, the more and more we find out it's a huge, great jigsaw and a montage of all these different little things that we've been, the person that we've been required to be was artificial. It was somebody else's idea. And yeah, we pay a huge price for it. And of course, even today, the young generation, the young kids are full of anger and full of frustration and disappointment. Report an error in the passage at 1:15:19 Highlight the passage at 1:15:19

1:15:46 And, you know, we're all lying to ourselves so much. It's incredible because we want it to be happy, happy. We want to believe what the advertisers are telling us when the advertisers themselves probably don't even buy the product that they're selling. It's all a story. The artificialness of it is really the great adventure, but also one of the joys of going on retreat. You know, you just go and sit and just be prepared to see what comes out of the woodwork. Report an error in the passage at 1:15:46 Highlight the passage at 1:15:46

1:16:18 And sometimes it might be a little memory of when you were five years old or what happened last week at the bus station or whatever that you didn't notice at all and didn't think anything of, but in here it's left a huge imprint. And it's still playing out this kind of the need to entertain or the need to be a good person and to always be composed or professional or an expert in something when realistically you can see how in that context the philosophy of fake it till you make it became popular but it's just made things worse. Report an error in the passage at 1:16:18 Highlight the passage at 1:16:18

1:16:57 So a lot of the journey And the adventure is discovering how conditioned we are. And it's fascinating. But it's very freeing. That's the beauty of it. I still use the term fake it till you make it because in a certain way, I still believe it. Yeah. How else are we going to get there? Where are you trying to get to? Yeah, well, it's the journey. Report an error in the passage at 1:16:57 Highlight the passage at 1:16:57

1:17:28 I mean, my journey is I want to go to the stream, you know. you just have to keep as if you fake it you keep it's like a practice because you're practicing you're faking but there's a there's so many levels of the faking going on but it's like in a play you know you don't know what you're doing and the opening night is coming and you you have to fake it right until you know or you don't make it or whatever but um You know, you have a job or you're a CEO and you're going in front of all these people and telling them what you believe and selling them products. Report an error in the passage at 1:17:28 Highlight the passage at 1:17:28

1:18:13 Right. Do you really believe? Right. Are you faking it too? I mean, is the whole world faking? We live in a fake world. That's why we go against everybody. We're against the flow. You know, go with the flow. We're trying to go against the flow, but still flow. At least we have you once in a while. You're delightful and so uplifting and you have a healing quality and a gentleness. Report an error in the passage at 1:18:13 Highlight the passage at 1:18:13

1:18:49 So we're here. We're grateful for this very moment. That's all I can say. Thank you for having me. Yes. And all these... Wonderful people in the meditation without boundaries. What is the new name, Gloria? Report an error in the passage at 1:18:49 Highlight the passage at 1:18:49

1:19:13 What? No. What is the new name of the group? The Boundless, the BSW, the BB, BB, G, yeah. The BSWA Boundless Meditation Group. Boundless Meditation Group, okay. I received a question from the chat as well. well so So I just want to ask from what I have been listening on today's session, how do we truly love ourselves? Report an error in the passage at 1:19:13 Highlight the passage at 1:19:13

1:19:48 What best can we do? Report an error in the passage at 1:19:48 Highlight the passage at 1:19:48

1:19:55 There's a lot of different ways of approaching this. One of the most effective ways, but often the most difficult way, unfortunately, is recognizing that the lack of love is... Report an error in the passage at 1:19:55 Highlight the passage at 1:19:55

1:20:10 Painful. And the lack of love has basically made such a huge challenge in our life that because we've never been open to it or that we've never experienced it in our own lives or in our families or anything like that, it's unfamiliar to us. It's a culture that we're just not comfortable with. There's all sorts of reasons that we're just not open to that peace, that happiness, that just enjoying being who we are. Report an error in the passage at 1:20:10 Highlight the passage at 1:20:10

1:20:40 And it sort of takes a lot to recognize that the absence of that happiness causes so much pain. So we can approach it through a compassion path, which isn't sort of, you know, a pity path. It's more sort of a recognizing that this is where we are. So let's make the best of it in a way. Let's investigate it deeper and sort of going, well, how can we really be a good gardener? Report an error in the passage at 1:20:40 Highlight the passage at 1:20:40

1:21:10 you know to to use what we already have the problem with the sort of the self-hate which is so common and so deep is that it's a huge firewall and it forms a huge part of our defense mechanisms that self-hate is very important subconsciously to regulate how we act in the world to fit into the artificial narrative the expectations The fashions, the conventions and so on. And so the absence of any love or authenticity in that is of course going to leave us empty. Report an error in the passage at 1:21:10 Highlight the passage at 1:21:10

1:21:49 And we chase things thinking they're going to make us happy and yet they make us feel more hollow. How does that work out? That's always the question. It's that shift of recognizing the implication of the situation we're in is absent of happiness and love and healing. And well-being and all these wonderful things which have always been available to us. So it's a matter of connecting to them instead. Report an error in the passage at 1:21:49 Highlight the passage at 1:21:49

1:22:17 And that is a large part of the journey is discovering that they might be buried deep under the concrete, but the happiness and the joy, the love, the forgiveness, the gratitude, all these wonderful qualities are still there. Report an error in the passage at 1:22:17 Highlight the passage at 1:22:17

1:22:35 We've never lost them. And that's kind of thing is rediscovering how to love is really one of the biggest and probably the hardest challenges, but it's for that reason the best challenge. So it's generally with more specifics or from the question or anything they'd like to sort of add about their own story is certainly helpful, but as a generic kind of all-purpose answer, I suppose we could say, it's... Report an error in the passage at 1:22:35 Highlight the passage at 1:22:35

1:23:08 recognizing the absence of love is very exhausting. It's making things worse for us. So we look for a change in habit, a change of mindset. So I hope that helps. Report an error in the passage at 1:23:08 Highlight the passage at 1:23:08

1:23:29 Eddie Report an error in the passage at 1:23:29 Highlight the passage at 1:23:29

1:23:34 says thank you to the answer. Report an error in the passage at 1:23:34 Highlight the passage at 1:23:34

1:23:41 One more little comment. I hope it's not too late. So is it good to think inherently that We were all born pure. And, you know, I don't mean in a Catholic sense, in a Christian sense, in a pure sense, like when you see nature, you know, pure and innocent. Report an error in the passage at 1:23:41 Highlight the passage at 1:23:41

1:24:08 And that we can strive to remove the surface. Innocent. Report an error in the passage at 1:24:08 Highlight the passage at 1:24:08

1:24:15 surface crud that we've accumulated trying to fake it. Do we make it so that we can have a goal? And not to be young again. I don't mean in that sense. But to really develop. Is it possible to develop a pure mind? Report an error in the passage at 1:24:15 Highlight the passage at 1:24:15

1:24:37 Yes, yes it is. And quite honestly, the Mahāyāna have the idea of the Buddha nature. And that can be very, very helpful to use that one. It's really a reflection that it's literally all this crud that's been built up on top of things. But when you also look at it is that when you start peeling those things off, what a surprise. Report an error in the passage at 1:24:37 Highlight the passage at 1:24:37

1:25:09 That sort of that purity was always there. It's basically that we just wallpapered it over. We buried it over. We forgot about it. We lost it. And the thing is, it's very, very helpful to peel back all this stuff and to see what's underneath. And for sure, sometimes there's traumas underneath there. Sometimes there's all kinds of pains and everything else. And that's part of the journey as well. Report an error in the passage at 1:25:09 Highlight the passage at 1:25:09

1:25:37 We unpack all this stuff and we can be present to those disappointments, that heartache, the depression and all the rest, and heal that as well. Start to sort of say, okay, we're depressed because we had a hope, a dream, or we invested in this beautiful idea that was sold to us on the TV. And we can see how these things were all conditioned. And it's layer upon layer upon layer upon layer. But the more we peel away, amazingly, the freer, the happier, and indeed, the more sort of pure it is. Report an error in the passage at 1:25:37 Highlight the passage at 1:25:37

1:26:14 It is really remarkable. And it is sort of the main point that we measure the purity of water by the absence of pollution. We measure the purity of air by the absence of pollution. We measure the purity of a diamond by the absence of its flaws and cracks and things like that. And the purity of mind by the absence of all greed, hatred and delusion, by the absence of the five hindrances and so on. Report an error in the passage at 1:26:14 Highlight the passage at 1:26:14

1:26:42 It's quite remarkable, all this stuff that... We can just like go off and it's wonderful. So absolutely possible. Thank you. Report an error in the passage at 1:26:42 Highlight the passage at 1:26:42

1:26:58 Maybe we can end with a sharing of merit or blessing. Okay. Is that okay? Yep. Report an error in the passage at 1:26:58 Highlight the passage at 1:26:58

1:27:15 Copyright © 2020 Mooji Media Ltd. etena All Rights Reserved. satya vajena sotite hotu sābhādā So, thank you for having me and hope to see you next time. Thank you Ajahn. Thank you Ajahn. Report an error in the passage at 1:27:15 Highlight the passage at 1:27:15