← B. Alan Wallace

Four Immeasurables Retreat with B. Alan Wallace - Sydney 2014 (part 7)

B. Alan Wallace · 2014 · 2 h 46 min · Vajrayana Institute via Internet Archive

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  • 4:37

    And we can move on and we can, as Buddha Gosa suggests, then gradually move out these concentric rings of the field of love and kindness. And hopefully when we come to its culmination, we have not excluded anyone. All the barriers are broken down, you know, from the dearest friend, from our very selves to the dearest friend. To the person that we find the most difficult to feel any kind of warmth towards and embrace that person as well. But all of this is taking place in the context of dualistic grasp, and so it can be very helpful.

  • 7:14

    But what would that entail? And that would entail being wide awake, luminous, bright, clear, discerning, intelligent, and still, doing anything that entails dualistic grasping, which is kind of like every activity that we engage in at any time. So how would you do that? Well, here's the symbol. I mean, it's a little symbol. I mean, it's a symbol because it actually looks a little bit like a candle flame. It tapers off to the tip, but an unflickering one.

  • 19:49

    order to bring about a dynamic equilibrium of the body, speech and mind, we settle each one in its own natural state, the body imbued with relaxation, stillness and vigilance, all the muscles soft, the eyes, the muscles of the face soft and relaxed, with this utter surrender of control and even preference. As we allow the respiration to settle in its own natural rhythm, which may vary from one breath to the next, as the body is balancing itself out by way of respiration,

  • 1:05:39

    So shamatha, and that means going all the way, fully achieving shamatha. So now your mind is serviceable, it's relaxed, it's stable, it's clear, it's luminous, it's blissful, it's still. It really works. It's supple. It's discerning. And you can sustain that quality of awareness effortlessly for hours on end and pretty much whenever you like. That's nice. That's useful. But the next great challenge then is to gain some clear insight, experiential insight, into the non-inherent nature, the empty nature of the mind itself, of your own mind.

  • 1:07:05

    All appearances have to be empty. All experiences have to be empty, including the experience of bliss. You haven't realized rikpa yet. You've not realized yet. You're an eight-minded clear light. But now you're really right next door. And if you've gone that far, the mind is beautifully tuned with your practice of shamatha. And you've broken up, crumbled all the reification of subject-object, subject-object dichotomy, even of awareness itself.

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0:37 I've mentioned, not very elaborately, but fairly briefly, a distinction between a developmental approach to each of the four measurables in contrast to a more of a discovery approach. There's a lot more to be said. I'll just say a little bit more about that. And that is, with a developmental approach, one, again, is practicing from the perspective of being a sentient being, which is pretty easy to do, since that's... Report an error

1:04 It certainly appears to be how we exist, sentient beings with mental afflictions, and caught up in something that figures very prominently in Buddhist philosophy when addressing the issue of view, how we view reality. It's called dualistic grasping. Dualistic grasping, where we grasp onto an object, it could be a person, a thing, really anything, even an idea, grasping onto it and then reifying it, grasping onto it as if it exists in and of itself by its own nature, independent. Report an error

1:32 autonomous, bearing its own intrinsic characteristics. And in so doing, but first of all, there's also this latching onto ourselves, a sense of I really am over here. There really is a person, an identity, a self over here. And from this vantage point, this kind of bedrock over here of a reified self, then we attend to an object, again, person, inanimate object, what have you, grasp onto that, reify that, and now we have an absolute duality. Report an error

1:59 That is a reified duality. I'm over here, the object's over there. And this is kind of the mudrā of it. It's kind of like really quite solid. Solids here, the kind of basis of Newtonian mechanics, things bumping into each other. And so that's one way to practice Dharma. And that is, as we attend to, as we did in the last practice, we may attend to ourselves and even objectify ourselves. Report an error

2:23 This happens a lot, actually. It happens a lot. Objectifying ourselves. Whenever a person feels low self-esteem. Who is it that's feeling low self-esteem towards whom? And I think we'll find there's something of a duality in there. I find myself to be such a disappointment. Report an error

2:42 I really don't, the kind of phrases that come out, I really don't like myself, I don't really feel I have much worth. I feel I'm quite a disappointment to myself. I'm really quite disgusted by myself. And so forth. There's many ways of phrasing it, right? Self-contempt, self-loathing, low self-esteem. But it seems like there's two people in there. Because one's looking down on the other one from a slightly elevated position. Report an error

3:03 Isn't it true? And so there's a reification. It's really like there's two in there. The one is kind of disappointed and the other one. And then we turn that outwards to somebody else and say, oh, but you also disappoint me. I find you're really not quite up to snuff either. And so then we do the same thing over there. So this reification, this dualistic grasping can occur everywhere. Report an error

3:24 But then we see how detrimental that is. I've met many people who suffer, and I mean literally very much suffer from low self-esteem. Really crippling. These four measurables can be like nectar for that. It can be really, really good. And starting with loving kindness. But the point there is that in the midst of our being, sentient beings and having mental afflictions and sometimes acting out of them, we recognize the painfulness of that and we begin to recognize the sources of our suffering, dissatisfaction and so on. Report an error

3:54 And then we can bring in the troops. Then we bring in the Dharma. Call in the gathering. And so then we bring in this wider way of practice as the four immeasurables and this practice and that practice. And so we get some real backup here, and we try to then counteract, apply remedies to the problems. And how are we applying the remedies? By way of dualistic grasping. Report an error

4:18 And that is, we bring to mind, for example, a loved one. It's a lovely practice. It's an authentic practice, good practice, of bringing to mind, as we did in the last session, A person who is very, very dear to us, we reflect upon, we attend to that person, reflecting upon the lovable qualities and then arouse that which is very easy to arouse, a sense of affection, of warmth and kindness. Report an error

4:37 And we can move on and we can, as Buddha Gosa suggests, then gradually move out these concentric rings of the field of love and kindness. And hopefully when we come to its culmination, we have not excluded anyone. All the barriers are broken down, you know, from the dearest friend, from our very selves to the dearest friend. Report an error

4:58 To the person that we find the most difficult to feel any kind of warmth towards and embrace that person as well. But all of this is taking place in the context of dualistic grasp, and so it can be very helpful. Report an error

5:12 And that's how you go about doing things, to overcome tendencies Report an error

5:21 that are diametrically opposed to the four measures, and also to overcome the false facsimiles. So there's a whole modality there, very strong, very well developed, of many things to be done. Report an error

5:33 But it's not the only way. Report an error

5:37 And the other way is just to release all grasping as much as you possibly can. In other words, it's the answer to the other question. What can I stop doing that I'm already doing, have been doing, what can I stop doing that I've already been doing, that has been impeding, inhibiting, blocking the natural flowering of my own Buddha nature, that is a pristine, luminous, pure nature of my own awareness, which in the Dzogchen view is really non-duals, none other than Buddha mind. Report an error

6:10 So, what can I stop doing? Well, if you know that what you're doing, that if you're doing things that are blocking that, impeding that, veiling that, obscuring it, stifling that, as we're locking into and reifying our own identity as a sentry being, if you have a clear sense, I'm doing a bunch of stuff, I'm doing a lot of things that are blocking, veiling and so forth, this deeper nature that is waiting to be discovered, then there is a solution, you know. Report an error

6:38 It's kind of an obvious solution. If you know that it's doing things that is blocking that, the solution is don't do anything at all. Stop doing anything, and at least then you won't be doing anything that's blocking that which you're inhibiting. It's kind of like a duh moment. Report an error

7:00 So how would you do that? Well, how you might do that is just not do anything at all, but do it consciously, or not do it consciously. The words get a bit slippery here. Report an error

7:14 But what would that entail? And that would entail being wide awake, luminous, bright, clear, discerning, intelligent, and still, Report an error

7:28 doing anything that entails dualistic grasping, which is kind of like every activity that we engage in at any time. So how would you do that? Well, here's the symbol. I mean, it's a little symbol. I mean, it's a symbol because it actually looks a little bit like a candle flame. It tapers off to the tip, but an unflickering one. Report an error

7:46 So it's not moving about because of... Agitation, distractions, grasping and so forth. But in that total release, that utter, really one can say existential letting go. Letting go even of the sense, I am a sentient being. Report an error

8:02 Because if we go to Madhyamaka, the middle way of you, the teachings of Nakajuna, if we ask, if I can speak with some authority, some confidence about this person here. And so if you ask me, am I a sentient being? The answer is, yeah, I am. You probably didn't doubt that, but I'm letting you know. Because I could be a Buddha. Report an error

8:20 But I know what's going on here. So I'm a sentient being. Yes. So no qualms there. But now Nagarjuna. Okay, fair. I got that right. I have mental addiction. I have all the earmarks of being a sentient being. So no question about that. Now the question is, is there an inherently existent sentient being here? Report an error

8:38 One that's really here. Absolutely. Intrinsically. Objectively. Absolutely. By my own inherent nature. Am I intrinsically, truly existent as a sentient being? What would you say, Mark? Because if you look for that sentient being, and I have done this actually. You say, okay, I know what essential being is. You know what they are. Mental affliction, suffering, craving, aggression, karma, karma, karma, neuroses, habitual propensities, body, five skandhas. Report an error

9:09 That kind of pretty well does it, doesn't it? I'm one of those. But then you say, okay, but now who's essential being? Stand up and show yourself. I see all these other things that are not you. Your mental affliction's here, skandha's there, and so forth. But now stand up and show yourself. Mr. Senshi being here, show up. Let's see you. Where are you? You who have this samsaric mind, samsaric body. You have mental education. You have karma. Report an error

9:33 Who's the agent here? Who's in charge? Who's this senshi being who's really here? Who's really here? Absolutely. Before any designation, any labeling, any conceptualization, this kind of rock of Gibraltar, senshi being, great big chunky senshi being. Where are you? Come out and show yourself. Interesting. Report an error

9:51 Where are you? Where are you? Report an error

9:58 You can't find it. But then if you look more deeply, you find not only you can't find it, like you can't find your keys, they must be somewhere, right? If you've lost your key to somebody, they must be somewhere. These keys don't just vanish, right? So there's a big difference between not finding your keys and then finding that they're not to be found. Report an error

10:20 That's a big difference. And so if you exist, if I exist, any of exist, as an inherent existent, truly existent sent your being, then I can say in my case, it's got to be over here. I'm not going to be over there. That's looking in the wrong place for sure. I'm not going to find it in you and your shoulder blade or your abdomen or your mind. I don't need to look there. If there's a sentient being, a really inherently sentient being who happens to be called Alan Wallace right now, he's going to be over here. Report an error

10:48 So he's going to be someplace in the body perhaps. Is there some kind of a CEO, some kind of an ego entity inside the brain that says, I've got you. You poke it. I found it. Neuroscientists don't give us much hope there. Okay, well, there are cells. Why would I think a cell or ganglia of neurons as me? That's kind of silly. They're chemicals. I have brain. I have neurons. I have all of those. Report an error

11:11 But I'm the haver. I'm the one that has a brain. I could have brain damage. I could lose parts of my brain. But I'm the one who has a head. I have a brain. I have a body. And I also have thoughts and images, emotions and desires. I have consciousness. And so then one looks and then one sees, one may find that, well, I've recognized now there's just no one there to be found, because I've looked in every nook and cranny, in a whole array, all of the whole dimension of my mind and of my body, and I've not found any haver, not found any separate agent who's, how do you say, somehow holding, controlling. Report an error

11:53 And so if there's no such being, then we shouldn't take it all that seriously. If it's really a construct, if it's something that exists only in dependence upon conceptual designation. Report an error

12:04 Then it has its validity, it has its reality to it, but it's not immutable, it's not absolutely there. And if it is constructed, if it arises independent upon conceptual designation, I am a century being, I am a century being, like that. Well, just why don't you pull that back, you know, reel that back, reel back the conceptual designation, release it, and in the absence of conceptual designation, and in the absence of all grasping, just see what's left when you release it. Report an error

12:36 At least as much grasping as you possibly can. And you're just resting in stillness in your own awareness. Report an error

12:46 Then you may discover dimensions of your own existence that were previously veiled because you were so locked into this mindset of being a sentient being, a man, a woman, an Australian, an American and so forth. Locked into, reified, as if that totally defines you. It doesn't. I would say that with company. Report an error

13:08 Whatever you think of yourself doesn't totally define you. There's more to you than that. And there's less of you than that can Report an error

13:18 be discovered with that, with his stillness. So he said in Dzogchen, on one classic Dzogchen decks that I've translated, called the Vajra Essence, Report an error

13:30 he said if you come to rest in your awareness, and in your awareness you release all grasping, and you cut through your ordinary conditioned awareness, and you cut through, you break through to pristine awareness, which is called rikma, primordial consciousness. Or in the global tradition often called the innate mind of clear light. Often called Buddha nature, sometimes called Dharmakaya. Sugatagabha, Tathagagabha, because by many names. Report an error

13:57 If you cut through to that, if you descend, if you break through to that dimension, Report an error

14:09 then it's that you have discovered non-dually your own ultimate Buddha nature is your own pristine awareness, innate mind of clear light. And it's said in this text, and the speaker is said to be Padmasama, that if you realize your own ultimate Buddha nature, Realize the identity of your own mind, your own awareness. With Buddha nature, with Dharmakaya, if you realize ultimate bodhicitta, then relative bodhicitta flows out spontaneously. Report an error

14:40 Because relative bodhicitta is an effulgence, an expression, a display, an emergence from ultimate bodhicitta. So Padmasambhava says in this context, it's right there in that book, Still in the Mind, that I translated and gave commentary. It's right there in the beginning of the text. He said, if you've realized that, Then there's no need to look outside of that to cultivate bodhicitta in some other way. For example, viewing all sentient beings as being your mother, which is a classic Mahāyāna method to develop a sense of kinship, a sense of affinity, warmth, closeness. Report an error

15:16 That's back to dualistic grasping. That's back into something very mundane, which is kind of saturated by delusion. Because dualistic grasping is... Not in accordance with reality. So why don't you just stay here and let the authentic bodhicitta rise out spontaneously without getting ensnared along the way into holistic grasping. Report an error

15:33 So if you tap in here, you get both. The relative emerging from the ultimate. So that's quite deep actually. So what I'd like to do for the next session is return to mindfulness breathing. But take a little bit different spin to it. Different method. The methods we've explored thus far, classic. This full body awareness, we're attending to the whole field, that comes from the Saṅgha. 5th century, 4th century, great Mahāyāna, pundit, scholar, contemplative. Report an error

16:05 He taught that. I've tried that in his text. It's quite clear. Full body awareness. This attending to the rise and fall of the abdomen, called Burmese technique. Don't know how old it is, but it's quite good. Good for stabilizing the attention. It grounds the attention. That's very good. Coming up here to the apoges of the nostrils, classic Theravāda. Classic Theravāda. Report an error

16:23 At least 1,500 years. Practicing. Very, very useful. Especially as the sensations of the breath get subtler and subtler, then the refinement of the vividness of attention goes very sharp, very fine. Report an error

16:38 But if we go right back to the Buddha's own teachings in the Pāli Canon, nowhere does he say attend to the whole body. Report an error

16:48 Nor does he say attend to the rise and fall of the abdomen. Nor does he say, no reference anywhere in the Pāli Canon, to attend to the tip of your nose or apertures of the nostrils. It doesn't come up at all. So all of those are interpretations. The interpretations, and very good interpretations. To say something as interpretation doesn't mean it's a misinterpretation. It's just like playing a piece of music. Report an error

17:07 And this is, well, this is my interpretation of this particular concerto by Beethoven. It's my interpretation of it. This musician over here has a different interpretation. That doesn't mean it's bad to interpret. I mean, that's what happens when you read music. You play it in a certain way. But if we go right back to the Buddha's own teachings in the Pāli Canon, he leaves it quite open. Report an error

17:26 He doesn't say attend here or there. He simply... Comments suggest in a very concise, extremely concise way, when the breath, in breath is long, when notes it is long. When the breath is short, when notes it is short. When the out breath is short, when notes it is short. Attending to the whole body, now that can be interpreted in different ways. Attending may be the whole body, but it's also interpreted as the whole body of the breath, the whole course of inhalation, exhalation. Report an error

17:56 Attending to the whole body. I breathe in. Attending to the whole body, I breathe out. And then finally, calming the system of the body, I breathe in. Calming the system of the body, I breathe out. And that's his complete instruction. That's what he gave. That's all the instruction he gave to achieve Shantide. It's pretty concise. So I love going back to the Pāli Canon. Report an error

18:19 It's kind of like a foundation for the whole of Buddha Dharma. And so what I'd like to do in this session we're about to begin is to do a minimalist interpretation. of the Buddhist teachings on mindfulness of breathing. And rather than talk about it, let's just go in and see what it's like in experiencing. Report an error

18:39 In Report an error

· · ·

19:49 order to bring about a dynamic equilibrium of the body, speech and mind, we settle each one in its own natural state, the body imbued with relaxation, stillness and vigilance, all the muscles soft, the eyes, the muscles of the face soft and relaxed, Report an error

20:21 with this utter surrender of control and even preference. As we allow the respiration to settle in its own natural rhythm, which may vary from one breath to the next, as the body is balancing itself out by way of respiration, Report an error

21:03 subtly settle your mind in its natural state. It's quite deep, the ability to release all your hopes and fears, even your hopes about your Dharma practice, hopes that your practice will turn out one way and not another. Report an error

21:19 Release it all. Release all grasping, all Report an error

21:27 goals. Now Report an error

21:39 see what Report an error

21:51 it's Report an error

22:13 like through Report an error

22:17 this deep, one could even say existential sense of release, of relaxation, of letting go, Report an error

22:28 not directing your attention to anything, Report an error

22:33 but also not spacing out or becoming drowsy. simply let your awareness come to rest in stillness. Report an error

· · ·

22:40 Simply let your awareness come to rest in its own place without going out, without going in, without attending to anything, without focusing on any object. Report an error

22:51 Just let your awareness rest right where it is, not slipping off to the past which is already gone or the future that is yet to come, hovering in the present moment. Report an error

· · ·

24:06 And you simply rest there with nothing to do, simply being aware and sustaining that flow of mindful presence. Again, the attention not darting off to one object after another, to the visual, the auditory, the tactile. Your awareness staying home when appearances arise, but you don't go out attending to them. Report an error

24:32 They don't capture your attention. You simply let your awareness rest in stillness without being distracted or carried away and without grasping onto anything. Report an error

· · ·

25:24 And as you're resting there, wide awake, clear. But not deliberately focusing your attention on any object, any appearance, even any mental appearance, like a thought or mental image. Just being present. Report an error

25:43 Something that you already knew may become more evident. And Report an error

25:54 that is your sheer, unmediated experience of being aware. It's called the awareness of awareness. The awareness of being aware. Rest there. Sustaining the flow of cognizance. Which is in no need of any conceptualization, any labels or words. You already know it before you think about it. Report an error

26:23 You already know that you're aware or that awareness is occurring. Report an error

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27:34 Deliberately or effortfully directing your attention anywhere. Once again be explicitly aware of something you are already aware of. Report an error

27:49 And that is this somatic field, the field of tactile sensations. Report an error

27:58 And you're already aware that this somatic field, this space, Report an error

28:06 It has fluctuations that occur within it, the best term I can find, fluctuations of the field. And these correspond to the in and out breath. Report an error

28:22 You don't need to look here or there. These somatic impressions, these somatic sensations of the fluctuations of the in and out breath, they rise up to meet you. So simply let your awareness illuminate these fluctuations and note quietly, non-discursively, without any commentary, when the in-breath is long, note that it is long. Report an error

28:53 The out-breath is long, note that it is long. And if over the course of the session the in-breath becomes short, note that. Out-breath is short, note that too. But you don't need to think about it. You already know it before you think about it. So to the best of your ability, sustain a non-conceptual, non-discursive, non-verbal flow of knowing. Report an error

29:23 But what you know above all is the sheer unmediated experience of being aware. This is primary. Report an error

29:37 Roundabout in the field. It's illuminated by this awareness. Take note, peripherally, of those fluctuations associated with the in and out breath, and note what they are long or short. Let's continue practicing now in silence. Report an error

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45:03 Buddhism has said that all mental afflictions, every single one, it's said to be 84,000 varieties in the biggest classification, that all mental afflictions are carried as a rat can carry fleas that carry bubonic plague, that they're carried or they're hosted by conceptual mind. Report an error

45:24 Conceptualization. Whether it's craving, hostility, delusion, whatever it may be, the conceptual mind is always the carrier. It's not to say the conceptual mind is bad, because it's, for example, through the conceptual mind we cultivate loving kindness, as we did in the preceding session. So conceptual mind is not bad, so it can convey, it can be the host for very wholesome, very virtuous, benevolent states of mind. But it's also the host for every single possible mental affliction. Report an error

45:52 And so insofar as one can simply duck under the radar, slip down into a mode that is non-conceptual, that may simply lead to a very deep state of samādhi and a withdrawal from the phenomenal world. Report an error

46:09 It may do that, as you were suggesting yesterday. That's one type of very deep retreat. Just go very deep into the mind, into a non-conceptual space and then hang out. It may lead to that, which is, as an end in itself, it's a dead end. But in the Dzogchen... Approach this school called the Great Perfection. As the Son and his Dalai Lama comments, actually it's a non-conceptual route. But it's not just going into a quiet space. Report an error

46:34 When you go into a very serene space, and maybe some of you had some taste of that in that session, there does tend to be some subtle grasping that comes on. That is, the grasping, I like this, I want to keep this quiet, I like the stillness, the clarity, maybe even some sense of joy, some enjoyment at least. Report an error

46:55 It's coming up, and then, oh, this is what I wanted. This is what I wanted. I like this. I don't want to come out. That's grasping, too. So if one can release even that grasping, then it's very subtle. You release that, then you may continue to go into freefall from the surface level, where most of us live most of the time, totally enmeshed like a fly on a spider web, enmeshed in our ordinary concepts of who we are, who our personal history is. Report an error

47:21 I mean, really. The analogy with a non-lucid dream is extremely close. In a non-lucid dream, for which your lifespan may be five minutes, you have no idea that you're going to be so short-lived. And when you're in that non-lucid dream, your whole identity is caught up within the persona within the dream. That's it. And you think everything around you is real, and you think this is who you really are, and then within that matrix, that matrix of this non-lucid dream, then of course you're not just sitting there like a stump. Report an error

47:50 You're also hoping this will happen, fearing this will happen, striving for this, going here, going there, and moving about, trying to find happiness, avoiding danger and suffering and so forth. And all locked into this notion, this is who I really am. And then, five minutes later, you either wake up or you slip right back into dreamless sleep. Report an error

48:11 So the analogy is very strong in the Buddha and all of the whole spectrum of the teachings of Buddha from the Pāli Canon, the Mahāyāna, the Vajrayana, right on through Dzogchen. The notion or the theme that waking reality is dream-like crops up everywhere. In every single stratum of the Buddhist teachings, dream-like, dream-like. Report an error

48:30 There's a nice story that synopsizes it really, really well. I tell it many times. It was a fellow, I think he was probably a wandering ascetic, his name was in Sanskrit Drona or in Pāli Dona. And he saw the Buddhist footprints. And for those of you who study Buddhism, you know there are 32 major, 80 minor marks. And one of them is... Report an error

48:51 Dharma chakra is a footprint, I mean, in the soul of his feet, a Dharma chakra. And so when he walks, he's leaving a very distinctive footprint. So this Drona saw his footprints. I mean, it's rather a large foot, and then also had his footprints. Well, this is really remarkable. Who left that? So he tracked him, like a tracker, like a hunter. Report an error

49:12 He tracked him, he tracked him, and then he saw him. And what he saw apparently really dazzled him. The Buddha was kind of manifesting his magnificence, and he was really startled. As he's gazing at the Buddha, he calls out to him and says, are you a god? Nowadays, if you ask somebody that, it's a really crazy question, but not in India, not 2,500 years ago. Report an error

49:36 Very common belief that Vishnu, Shiva, Sarasvati, these gods, just like in the Greek tradition, that they're gods, but they sometimes manifest as human beings. Very, very common belief. So he wasn't being crazy when he said, are you a god? Have you two suddenly manifested this? But are you a god? The Buddha said, no. Report an error

49:55 Well, are you an elemental spirit? Like in classical India, they've got all kinds of non-physical, non-human, non-animal beings. Are you an elemental spirit? The Buddha said, no. Are you a celestial being, like an angel or something like that, some ethereal being manifesting in that way? Report an error

50:18 Pretty human, I mean, got a head, arms and so forth. So finally he asked, the obvious one, he said, well, are you human? And that's the interesting question, an interesting answer, because the Buddha said no. Report an error

50:35 His dad was a human, his mom was a human, his wife was a human and his baby was human. That kind of brackets him. And he said no. He still said no. Report an error

50:46 And then Drona said, who are you? And he said, I'm awake. Report an error

50:55 And that's the meaning of Buddha, awake, somebody who's awake. Report an error

51:01 So how did that practice go? Bewilderment, clarity, confusion, wandering mind. Were you able to do it? Or was it so elusive you just couldn't get, couldn't settle into it? Anybody? Report an error

51:22 Yes, please. Report an error

51:29 Yeah. Report an error

51:45 I just missed that. And what about the breath? Yes. Yes. okay with your attention this kind break then we have to keep that civilization and the forces set her in the periphery. then you start to the energy. Report an error

52:11 like, very meditational, I feel like, uh... Oscar Wilde arrived in the US? Report an error

52:22 I don't know the story. Report an error

52:33 That sounds like Oscar Wilde. Oscar Wilde arrived in the U.S.? When pastor said to me, do you have anything to declare? He said, I need my sheep, Report an error

52:36 it's a real seduction because what happens when I get rid of the attention, then I can have rid of the attention at Report an error

52:53 of powerfulness which kind of like the whole thing becomes so Yeah. Yeah. especially creativity because like you know a way of life you know you can answer these questions for a long time suddenly a ship of brilliance comes out it's not not it's not yeah right I've never tried cocaine, but I think I know what you refer to. Report an error

53:23 You know, so when you say that we start to manifest like that, it is, you know, I'm suspecting it's always not a good start call. I know that it's probably really easy, but it feels good. Report an error

53:45 very painful space outside of the meditation, soaked off identifying with Report an error

54:08 There's an old story that just comes to mind, springs to mind, from the Kadampa tradition. Whenever you think, don't think about new Kadampa tradition, that's another deal. The Kadampa tradition, the authentic one, the old one. Report an error

54:21 Whenever you think about that, you should really think something really good, because they were really, really good. They were beloved by all schools of Tibetan Buddhism, just because they were so clear, so grounded, so pure. And so the stories coming out of the Kadampa tradition are kind of all good and simple and right to the point. Report an error

54:36 And there's a story that comes from the Kadampa tradition. I think three men. It's a parallel. I'm not sure it's historically correct. I don't care. But one received a gift. Report an error

54:50 The gift was writing. It was naturally gifted. And he went into meditation and then all kinds of creative writing comes out. He became a great writer. Report an error

55:03 Another one, I don't remember the exact details, but the gist of the story I do remember. The second one went into meditation. He also had a great gift, maybe as a Tibetan medical doctor. He just had this flair, this natural genius, natural gift for just really understanding the herbs and the herbal compounds, diagrams. Report an error

55:23 He just slipped right in and became a very great doctor. And the third one, he went in meditation. And he didn't have any gifts at all. He became a Buddha. Report an error

55:45 I know very well what you're talking about. Years ago, when I was, I'm not going to go on along, but this is a short story. When I was at Stanford. I got through about four years of it, and I just couldn't take it anymore. It wasn't that it was bad, but I couldn't take it anymore. All the academia, the intellectualism, I just was like, I'm going out of here. Report an error

56:07 And I spoke with my very good dissertation advisor, and I said, you know, I don't think I can take this anymore. And he said, Alan, you finish all your coursework, just take your comprehensive exams, and then your ABD, your all-but-dissertation. Then all you have to do is write a dissertation, and then you finish. Report an error

56:24 But if you leave now before taking a comprehensive exam, then you're kind of AWOL. Finish the comprehensive exam, then you can take off for a while. And you've got a long leash. Take off as long as you like, then come back, and if you want to, then finish up your dissertation. I said, OK. So I did. Finished my comms, passed them. Then I just streaked off to the mountains. High desert, eastern California. Report an error

56:45 Six months, real deep solitude. I hardly saw anybody, right through the winter. And all I wanted to do was meditate. Boy, did I not want to do anything academic. But I did a lot of research for my dissertation. And you know what happens. Up there, really pristine, high desert, crystal clear, nobody there. Report an error

57:06 Once every two weeks, somebody would drop off food for me. He wouldn't even see me. He'd head down the mountain. And I'd be going to meditation. And it was kind of like just a geyser of creative ideas and insights and just plaguing me like rats. Report an error

57:23 So I just had to deal with it. But I had decided, yeah, I think I'd like to finish, not just, you know, cut it off. I'd like, yeah, I think it's worthwhile to do. It's meaningful. Finish the PhD and then I can reassess altogether. So when I was just being plagued, I mean, it was a high, but it's also not what I wanted. I wanted quiet. I didn't want to have a whole bunch of creative ideas coming up and connections and sparks flying in all directions. Report an error

57:50 And so what I did in that phase then is I'd be sitting quietly. During my practice, it wasn't this one that was closely related. When I just get assaulted by all these creative ideas, I'd have a piece of paper and I'd just write down the minimal amount of notes that I could so that I'd remember them later. Report an error

58:10 And again, I'm out of my system, almost like flushing them out of my system so they'd be on paper, then I wouldn't have to think about them or remember them. Flush them out. Because they wouldn't come homogenously, they'd come in gushes, gushes like that. And so when they gushed and I got them out, so now I don't have to, I know when I read those notes I'll know what it's about, but after my session, then I can go in and then I can keep on going. Report an error

58:31 And that turned out to be a good solution. Because I had decided prior to that that I'm not going to completely terminate halfway through my doctoral studies. And I'm glad I finished, I didn't think it was worthwhile. But it's quite a relief actually when it doesn't happen. And so there's the call, there's the call. Report an error

58:51 And that is creativity coming up. Novel ideas, fresh ideas, brilliant ideas, at least from one's own perspective. And sometimes other people agree. There's a basic decision to be made, and that is, for my aspirations now, is this worth breaking the session and writing stuff? Or for my aspirations now, am I willing to release this gift altogether? And just let it float right on by. And if I never remember it, that's the breaks. Report an error

59:23 And that's a core decision. And then that's your decision. Nobody's going to make it for you. That's your decision. But sooner or later, in such practice, the priority may shift. The priority is maybe, maybe, whatever's coming up is not as important as this. Report an error

59:49 And then you exercise on a very subtle level, non-grasping. Non-grasping, latching on to, identifying, holding on to, and wanting to write down and promulgate. Report an error

1:00:00 Non-grasping to any of the creative ideas, but more subtly than that. Non-grasping to the bliss. Non-grasping to the wonderful serenity of the silence of the mind. And also, you didn't mention it, but actually you did in a way. Clarity. This term clarity, luminosity, which is one of the salient features of consciousness itself. Report an error

1:00:22 Luminous and cognizant. Those are the two qualities I mentioned before. Well, the luminosity manifests in different ways, and one of them is creativity. What did you say? My sheer brilliance. Well, that's the luminosity of consciousness manifesting as literature, essays, whatever it may be, but that's an expression and a fortune of the luminosity of awareness, the brilliance of awareness. Report an error

1:00:44 But also, it's a derivative, it's a formulation, a formulation. Because it's in words, it's in images, it's in music, whatever it may be. A mathematical formula could be all kinds of things. Einstein said this in terms of all this burst of creativity. The creativity came out first as sheer imagery, and then he had to find the words for it later. Report an error

1:01:05 The conceptualization came later, and the burst of creativity came out first, especially in his miraculous year, 1905. But that's how he described it. He should know. He was watching the whole process take place. But if one really wants to descend all the way to the depths. In the Dzogchen path, if you'd like to really come to its culmination, to come to the ground, this ground awareness, this pristine awareness, then you don't follow any of the sirens that appear along the way. Report an error

1:01:35 As seductive, as enchanting as they may be, there's something you value more highly. And it was that the release of all grasping, even the grasping to the luminosity, the bliss and the serenity, the stillness of awareness. Even releasing that, that's when you go into free flow and you go all the way down to the ground. Report an error

1:02:12 Say again? Report an error

1:02:16 I still miss that. I think the microphone about six inches away is probably better. Go ahead. Yeah? That you may have asked for some comments we've got. Report an error

1:02:25 can be a hard task when the bliss is orgasmic, really, really strong, and it's something that is-like. So, you know, it's not like you just have a little, it's really strong, and it's persistent. You know, like for example, you go to the inside, You've you go got to to the inside, you go to the inside. Report an error

1:02:50 do it, John. I miss what you just said, but I think you have the gist anyway. I don't know, I don't recall having said at any point, oh by the way, this is easy. Report an error

1:03:05 So, it's quite hard, it's true. But then if it were easy, then we'd already have achieved enlightenment. So here's the challenge. There's no question it's hard. But then most meaningful things often wind up being difficult or challenging anyway. Report an error

1:03:23 There's a phrase, detong, detong, that comes up a lot in especially Vajrayana. And detong is bliss emptiness, bliss hyphen emptiness. That the bliss is also not inherently existent. The bliss itself is empty. And if you can ascertain the emptiness of the bliss, Then there's much less to latch onto, to grasp onto. And so that is again that freefall of just experiencing bliss itself arising and being empty in its nature. Report an error

1:03:52 As the creative thoughts and visions and appearances arising and seeing them as empty of nature, empty of nature. This is why in the classic sequence of Dzogchen, absolutely classic, there are these three phases when you go right to the core of core practices. The first of these is shamatha. You've got to get the mind to be serviceable. Report an error

1:04:14 If you bring your ordinary mind with all of its garbage, all of its junk, all of its flip-flopping between attention, hyperactivity and deficit, it's hopeless. Whatever comes up, it won't have any staying power. It'll just be stormed by all the dust of the mind, the obscurations of the mind. So we really have to get our act together sooner or later if one is really intent on a path and not simply practicing Dharma. Report an error

1:04:41 A path means something where you're evolving, transforming in an irreversible fashion. That's a path. Until then, we're practicing this, practicing that, and that's cool. But then there's a path. That's actually where you're just practicing. You're actually moving someplace. You're going from here to there, and there is awakening, and it's irreversible. So that's kind of a big deal. That's why I'm still teaching, actually, because I have hundreds of hours of podcasts out there and 40 books, so I think that's enough in terms of just sheer divulgence of information. Report an error

1:05:09 I think I've spewed out enough, maybe. But I'm still teaching, because I think this is important, to find the path. The classic sequence, we're going to have to stop, we can't just have a dual conversation here. But the classic sequence, as we're saying, because this is relevant to everybody here, sooner or later, one way or another, either here or there, shamatha really needs to be accomplished if one is really serious about bringing about irreversible and meaningful transformation and liberation. Report an error

1:05:39 So shamatha, and that means going all the way, fully achieving shamatha. So now your mind is serviceable, it's relaxed, it's stable, it's clear, it's luminous, it's blissful, it's still. It really works. It's supple. It's discerning. And you can sustain that quality of awareness effortlessly for hours on end and pretty much whenever you like. Report an error

1:05:58 That's nice. That's useful. But the next great challenge then is to gain some clear insight, experiential insight, into the non-inherent nature, the empty nature of the mind itself, of your own mind. Realizing it too does not exist by its own nature, it's not inherently existent. But then probing right into your awareness itself and seeing it too is not inherently existent. Even awareness is not inherently existent. Report an error

1:06:25 And knowing that, not just thinking it or believing it, but actually ascertaining the emptiness of your own awareness, that it is empty and luminous. Luminous and empty. Luminous and empty. Report an error

1:06:42 And if the awareness itself is empty, then it follows both logically but also experientially. If you have some real insight here, if you have an awareness that your awareness itself is empty of inherent nature, does not exist by its own intrinsic qualities, then it's kind of obvious that all objects of awareness also have to be empty. Report an error

1:07:05 All appearances have to be empty. All experiences have to be empty, including the experience of bliss. You haven't realized rikpa yet. You've not realized yet. You're an eight-minded clear light. But now you're really right next door. And if you've gone that far, the mind is beautifully tuned with your practice of shamatha. And you've broken up, crumbled all the reification of subject-object, subject-object dichotomy, even of awareness itself. Report an error

1:07:35 You've crumbled that. You may not have fully realized it yet, but it's gotten, really, you've shattered it. Like, you've shattered it. Then from that perspective, if you can just release, Report an error

1:07:53 Then there may be nothing to snag you, to hold you up in the conventional mind, but you may really be able to go to freefall. And then you simply come to rest in an open expanse where your awareness is non-dual from Dhamma to ultimate space, absolute space of phenomena, which is emptiness, which is Nirvāṇa. Report an error

1:08:18 So that's the strategy. Shamata, Vipassanā, and then you cut through. If one skips any of those, you may get glimmerings, you may get spikes, you may get some insights into the later, but you won't be able to see them. So this happens when people receive pointing out instructions from a really qualified Lama. Report an error

1:08:37 Many people have very meaningful experiences, really, I mean, like the most meaningful. But if they don't have that foundation in Shama de Vipassanā, then it turns into a memory, a really valuable memory, but a memory which is then locked into a conceptual grid, which is then not the thing. Report an error

1:09:00 To help us... Practice and achieve shamatha and vipassanā. The four measurables is a really good idea. And so I discussed earlier the distinction between the I-it, the I-you, the I-thou relationship. It's from this 20th century existentialist philosopher, Martin Buba. It's so consonant with Buddhism that I've invited him to the party. Report an error

1:09:26 And just a quote here. It's simple. It's very much to the point. From the Dhammapada, animosity is never quelled with animosity. Animosity is quelled only with... Absence of animosity. This is an ancient truth. Well, this is in the context of loving kindness. And when you read it, it's kind of like, that's obvious. Report an error

1:09:46 And yet, we forget it so often. In marital disputes, community disputes, international disputes. It's just amazing how mesmerized we are, we humans beings, by thinking that animosity will actually provide the solution. When there's conflict, border conflicts, Palestine, Israel, Syria, ISIS, Iraq, etc., etc., Taliban, etc., etc. Report an error

1:10:19 It's all over. That's just one area of the world. But it's so amazing that still, after all these hundreds of years, thousands of years of civilization, we still haven't figured that one out globally. Report an error

1:10:31 It's so obvious, but we forget. So in terms of stages of meditation moving right along, this is now classic. This is from the Theravāda tradition. Report an error

1:10:45 Buddhagosa, His Path of Purification, called Visuddhi Magga in Pāli. And as I mentioned before, we've delved into this in one session. So I'll talk about it a little bit, we'll take a break and come back and practice again. But it begins by really reflecting upon, understanding deeply, having a good conceptual understanding of that which is utterly toxic, antithetical to the experience, the cultivation and realization of loving kindness. Report an error

1:11:19 And that's hatred. Hatred, or again, hatred can be simply an emotion. It is regarded as emotion. And once again, this whole tree is not really so much about emotions. It's more about intentions and aspirations. And so while hatred, anger, is an emotion, by the way, the word emotion doesn't even exist in Sanskrit or Pāli or Tibetan. Report an error

1:11:38 So that's how little emphasis there was on it. We didn't even have a word for it. But then in English, in ordinary English, we don't have a word for mental affliction either, do we? That's a made-up term. But look at modern psychology, where's the word for mental affliction? Psychosis, neurosis? Report an error

1:11:56 And so emotion doesn't really figure very prominently. There just wasn't any particular need for that category. Whereas in the West we have that because Aristotle. It's reason and emotion. It goes back to him, maybe before too, but reason and emotion. Big gender bias there. The men are the rational ones, right? The women are the emotional ones. Report an error

1:12:14 That's why the women are not quite up to stuff. Because the highest faculty of man is reason. Women are, you know. They're trying. But that's where it came from, this whole notion. But, you know, I think that a lot of modern psychologists have recognized by now that emotions are often really fused with reason. Report an error

1:12:36 And our reason, our intelligence, is often infused with emotion. So to somehow put them in different boxes and then let alone give them a gender to it is kind of like not one of the brightest ideas we've ever had. But in any case, it's not a dichotomy that crops up in Buddhism actually at all, reason versus emotion. Mental affliction versus wholesome states of mind, that yes, but the wholesome states of mind are not all reason, and the mental afflictions are not all emotions by any means. Report an error

1:13:01 Delusion is not an emotion. That's why, just by the way, as a translator, sometimes I think translators just act like lemmings. Very, very often, including by very good translators, this word klesha, klesha, mental affliction, many people are translating this now. You're kind of caught on like a virus. Afflictive emotions. Ever seen that one? Afflictive emotions. It's completely wrong as a definition of klesha, and it's obviously wrong. Report an error

1:13:30 And yet, even really good, I'm just saying this not to make just beef about something, but when you see afflictive emotions, you know, think twice. Because an emotion is emotion. Afflictive emotions are kleshas, but not all kleshas. In fact, most are not emotions. Delusion is not an emotion. Does anybody think delusion is an emotion? Not in the Western definition, not in English, not in French or any other European language. I don't think so. Delusion is not an emotion. Report an error

1:13:55 Nor is ignorance. That's not an emotion. And actually, for that matter, craving is not an emotion. It's cognitive, not affective. So two out of three of the poisons, delusion, craving and hostility, only one's an emotion. That's hostility, anger, hatred. Delusion is cognitive and craving is cognitive. Report an error

1:14:16 But they're not affective, therefore they're not emotions. So I really, I mean, I know it sounds nice, destructive emotions, afflictive emotions, but if you look into the broader band, just anybody can look, look at the primary mental affliction, look at the secondary mental affliction, you find most of them are not emotions. Report an error

1:14:30 So to take that term and define it, translate it as, it's really misleading. I mean, really, in a very practical way, very misleading, because then you think, well, I'm not experiencing any afflictive emotion, I must be okay. Report an error

1:14:42 And you're being incredibly pompous as you say that. Pomposity is not an emotion. It's a cognitive. It's a cognitive affliction. So translation is not trivial. That's why I raise it. But here we are. There's the meditation on hatred, which is an emotion. But then, again, this isn't really so much an emotion, this context. Report an error

1:15:07 It really should be ill will. So maybe I should change the notes there. Ill will. So it's enmity. It's called nut sen in Tibetan. Nut sen. Nut means to injure. And Sem is a mind, a mind to injure, a mind to injure, an injurious state of mind, a mind that is intent on injury. Sem is an intention. Report an error

1:15:27 Ill will is an intention. Enmity is an intention. It's not simply an aspiration, it's an intention. That's why it's included among the ten non-virtues, three non-virtues of the mind, right? Sem is an intention. You're planning, you're intending to do something that's injurious to somebody and not for their benefit, just because you don't like them. Some mental afflictions behind it, probably hatred. Report an error

1:15:47 And so to reflect upon this, to reflect upon the effects of ill will, both temporarily, that is in terms of just your social interrelationships, your body, your health and so forth, there are a lot of studies done with Islam. It's usually called anger or hatred. But ill will, again, is anger and hatred with traction. It's really got a grip. It's moving towards some destination. Report an error

1:16:13 It has an action plan. So it's hatred in action. For anger and action, ill will. But the effects, many, many studies have done of this. And just a summary, it's not good for you. Not good for your heart, not good for your immune system, not good for your health and vitality. It's really quite harmful. And that's just to yourself. That's before you manifest it in the world, and hardly anything needs to be said. So much unnecessary suffering in the world comes because of this mental factor of ill will arising. Report an error

1:16:46 And then not being released or impeded, but actually then manifesting the world through speech, through physical behavior. And then so much, so much harm. And then spiritually, then of course, terribly detrimental in terms of any kind of spiritual aspirations of maturation, of liberation, of awakening. Report an error

1:17:06 Ill-will hatred is, I mean, just sheer poison. So meditating on the effects of hatred and also its antidote, which is patience, forbearance, fortitude. So that kind of lays the groundwork, saying, okay, what's the lay of the land here as the aspiration is to cultivate loving kindness? And it's good to know, okay, what's your biggest obstacle here? Report an error

1:17:25 What is diametrically opposed to what you'd like to cultivate? And how do you protect yourself from that? Well, it's ill will, and then patience is there to keep that at bay so it doesn't dominate, storm the castle, so to speak, of your mind. Report an error

1:17:41 And so Buddhagosa, his phrases, they sometimes call them slogans, but I don't like that word too much. But the phrases that he uses, it comes in different guises and I think I've seen a variety of them, they all seem pretty good to me. If they're helpful, they're helpful, that's most important. But a direct translation is, starting with yourself, may I be free of animosity or ill will, that's the word, ill will, enmity, the wish to injure, or if we glossed it a bit directly to this, the ill will that you wish the other person not to find happiness or the causes of happiness. Report an error

1:18:16 May I be free of animosity. Free of affliction, and there you can put in physical, because that's very much included. Free of anxiety and everything else that afflicts the mind, so that's why I glossed it in the preceding, preceding meditation. And may I live happily, or may I be well and happy. So there are not a whole lot, but there are a number of people who are teaching mettā bhavana. I mean, there are probably a fair number, actually. Report an error

1:18:41 And they'll have their own ways of phrasing this to make it really very nice English or Spanish, French, whatever the language is. The gist of it is very important, and the phrasing, well, if one can find a more poetic way of saying it, that's good, no problem. There's no one right way. So there's the core sequence of aspirations, and it culminates really in may I live happily, may I be well and happy, and that's where it's manifestly loving kindness, because loving kindness has this positive valence to it. Report an error

1:19:10 It's not may I be free of, but rather may I realize, may I be well and happy. Report an error

1:19:21 And so in arousing that, we've done this a number of times so I can be quite brief now, one may arouse this aspiration for one's temporal happiness or hedonic well-being, which is important, and then bring wisdom to it and arouse a deeper aspiration, a wiser aspiration, developing your cognitive intelligence to aspire that you may realize genuine happiness and the causes of happiness. Report an error

1:19:44 And here's the direct quote I mentioned earlier, one who loves himself will not harm another. If you really know it's good for you. Then you'll not harm another one because you'll know that's detrimental to yourself. Report an error

1:19:56 And then one starts to expand. So you start in the center and you remain there as long as you need to. I have met people who have experienced really chronic low self-esteem. Report an error

1:20:09 I met somebody just recently. I think she's getting over it well now. I think she's really emerging from that cocoon. But she would say such disparaging things about herself. Like, I'm really stupid. I'm really slow. And I've had conversations with this person. I see no evidence of that at all. Why are you saying that? Well, I've been told that so many times. And if the people around you, especially those you respect, if they keep on telling you, you're really stupid, you're slow, you're stupid, you're slow, and you keep on hearing like a mantra, unless you have a lot of self-knowledge, you probably believe them. Report an error

1:20:48 And so that takes a lot of detox, like a rehabilitation, to get over that and to develop a friendly relationship to oneself without being narcissistic or self-congratulatory. So as long as that takes, and in any help, maybe there are cases where it would be very good to venture into this practice, and if you have a very wise and compassionate therapist, maybe that person can speed things on a little bit. Report an error

1:21:15 There's a lot of wisdom there, and I think a lot of therapists have had a lot of experience dealing with people with low self-esteem. It's so common. So they must have learned a lot of things, have a lot of insights. So they may be able to be helpful too. Nobody has a monopoly here. So I'm seeing this as an area which has already begun, but I think it's a good growth industry of therapists, whether psychiatrists, psychotherapists, who have some good understanding of meditation, some authentic form or forms of meditation. Report an error

1:21:44 They're not bewildered and not oblivious when it comes to that. But their professional training is years of training and experience as a therapist, on the one hand. And then meditation teachers have a lot of experience in meditation and know something about therapy, even if not trained in it. And then teaming up, teaming up, the therapist and the meditation teacher. And you want on both sides, they should be experienced, wise and compassionate. Report an error

1:22:10 Experience wise and compassionate, as much as possible. Because if they're not, keep on looking. And so that's really, I think, very fruitful. It's begun already, but there's a lot of room for growth there. So one who loves himself or not. Report an error

1:22:28 And so when one has things sorted out, you really do have a benevolent, loving, caring attitude. But which is not to be mistaken with something I see a lot in New Age Buddhism. Report an error

1:22:40 I've seen this a lot, actually, especially when people put this spin on mindfulness as being non-judgmental. I've seen this, and sometimes it's hysterical. It's so completely absurd. I'm wondering, what were you thinking? Actually, the standard test that I read and I've cited... There's one whole section of the test to see how well you're doing in mindfulness, whether you're practicing mindfulness well, you're really getting hang of it. It's hysterical. Report an error

1:23:04 It's so crazy. What? And that is whatever comes up. The ideal here is never evaluate whether your perceptions are valid or invalid. Never evaluate whether emotions, desires and thoughts are wholesome or unwholesome. Just whatever comes up. And pardon me if I'm getting a little bit sarcastic. Whatever comes up, just be, embrace everything. It's all part of yourself. Accept everything. So you're mean-spirited and aggressive and manipulative and real soul sex addict. Report an error

1:23:35 But that's who I am. So you're a greedy bastard who's aptly steal other people blind. But that's who I am. I have to accept as I am. Because I have to accept all of me. It's really idiotic. And it does happen. I'm not exaggerating. I read that and I said, you've got to be kidding. This will make people moral imbeciles and intellectually... Report an error

1:23:57 Demented. And you think that's a good thing. So be careful when people say non-judgmental. There are very intelligent ways of interpreting that. And I've heard from John Kabat-Zinn's lips. He's a smart guy and he's a good guy. I've known him for more than 20 years. His spin on it is intelligent. But throw it out there in the public and oh man, ridiculous stuff coming out. Report an error

1:24:17 So that's not Buddhism. To think that's the essence of Buddhism is completely crazy. It would be like going to a cafeteria and having food you're allergic to and food that's rotten and that little pile of dog feces, you know, just in case you like. And then just think, but I'll accept everything. The food I'm allergic to and, oh, some of that dog feces is absolutely bad. I don't want to be partial. Report an error

1:24:41 And just then chowing down and making yourself sick to death. Neither one is any more sensible than the other. So one wants to, I think, be very careful there. There's a lot of rubbish out there. That's one of the problems in terms of Buddhist meditation teachers, to be a therapist. If I, for example, if I just went down to Sydney and opened up a little office and said, Alan Wallace, therapist, come, I'll give you some therapy, how long would it take me before they shut me down and probably fine me? Report an error

1:25:07 Because I have no credentials at all as a therapist. I'm not a therapist. So it's illegal, isn't it? Yeah, I thought so. Good. Or let alone if I said, Dr. Alan Wallace, M.D. With no training at all. Report an error

1:25:23 A medical kind of guy. Then it's probably a prison term. I mean, man, they'd hammer you for that. But if you just, anybody, Joe Doe, set up your little office in Sydney and say, meditation, Buddhist meditation teacher, ready to teach. You can teach any bullshit you like. And there's no law against it at all. And if you have a lot of followers, then you become popular. Then you become an authority. Just by the sheer fact that you're popular. Report an error

1:25:49 I say that, it is a problem. Because some of the most popular things coming out are total rubbish. But people like to hear them. A lot of people then agree. And then it gets published in the press. And then suddenly you have these authorities who don't know squat. They don't know what they're talking about. But they're very popular. So one has to be discerning here. Because the stakes are actually very high. And there are a lot of qualified teachers of all schools. Report an error

1:26:13 And a lot who are just as renowned who really shouldn't be teaching at all. So one starts with the self, develops a wholesome, a healthy, a discerning. In a very meaningfully critical stance of recognizing what is wholesome and not wholesome in one's behavior, one's mental state, recognizing what is to be embraced, cultivated, nurtured, and what is better to be released and not cultivated or acted upon. Report an error

1:26:38 So one goes there and then one recalls another's acts of kindness, of virtues that inspire affection and respect and wish may this good person be happy and free from suffering. So that's that second phase. Where you bring to somebody who really you deeply admire, he said, acts of kindness and virtues that inspire affection and respect. So such a person, I'm sure you can think five seconds, you'll come up with somebody. Report an error

1:27:01 And you feel this person, this relative love, this person really deserves to be happy. This person is so kind, so virtuous, such a good person. I really wish you well. And it comes quite spontaneously. Good, go for that, cultivate that. And then one moves on to a dearly loved, loved friend. Report an error

1:27:20 Doesn't need any commentary. And then to a more casually loved friend, if you really want to see the spectrum there, you start moving out, moving out. And then eventually you come to a neutral person. Report an error

1:27:31 And the best kind is a person you know quite well. There may be such people, maybe not. But a person you know quite well could be even a relative, like a cousin or something. Or it could be a business colleague. That happens a lot. Where you just meet this person a lot in the business. Oh yeah, hi Joe, good to see you again. Report an error

1:27:47 But the person doesn't arouse any animosity, any aversion. But seeing this person, it doesn't arouse any affection either. It's just, oh, yeah, Joe, you know, whatever. So kind of just neutral, kind of indifference. And you can tell because if Joe should suddenly get a promotion or something really good happened to Joe, win the lottery or whatever, you don't really care much one way or another. Report an error

1:28:10 So that's cool, but to Joe, I mean, it's not my business. And if Joe suddenly gets... Diagnosed with terminal cancer, say, oh, what a shame. I'm sorry. Sorry about that. But it doesn't really impact you at all. Nothing really happens. It happens. People get cancer. What can you do? So that's the joke, where there's no attachment, no aversion, but then kind of not caring one way or another. Just one more person. Report an error

1:28:32 And you may actually know the person well. So that's a good person to focus on. That we're seeing but not seeing. That would be a good case of an I-it relationship, wouldn't it? That we're just not connecting with that person as a sentient being, a subjective human being like ourselves. See it more just as an appearance or kind of like a moving doorstop, a utensil. Report an error

1:28:56 So consider a neutral person as a dearly loved person. So you see the sequence there. And that you start with yourself and then you wish, let's say this person you greatly respect and admire, wishing this person well, like yourself. And then you go to a dearly loved friend, like this very highly respected friend, and then you go to a neutral person and wish this person well as if he or she were a dearly loved friend. Report an error

1:29:20 And then finally you go into hostile territory. And this is people that you can, the enemies, the so-called enemy, you can define that in two ways. Somebody that you find, you regard as an enemy, or as a person who regards you as an enemy, a person who wishes you ill, that person can also be regarded as an enemy. Report an error

1:29:41 It depends on which way you want to spin it. But this category can be simply because of the person's appearance, attitudes, way of speaking, behavior in general, although no particular direct impact on yourself. You just find this is a very disagreeable person, very unlikable person, maybe hateful person. So that's a possibility. Report an error

1:30:04 Or sometimes we identify a person. That we have the hardest person to love because of how they treated us. So it's personal, it's up close and personal. And this person may be loved by many other people, many other people, but this is a very nice person. Except you know, yeah, nice publicly, but what you don't know is then what goes on behind closed doors. A good friend of mine, this one I'll keep anonymous, because it might possibly be an invasion of his privacy, but his father was a medical doctor, very intelligent. Report an error

1:30:38 And a man of the community. A medical doctor, staunch, upright citizen, admired, respected, well-liked, good, solid citizen. And at home, behind closed doors, really brutal, really brutal to his son, his wife, harsh, physically, verbally, brutal. Behind closed doors, though, outside, looking good, inside. Report an error

1:31:12 Closed doors, quite a different story. Report an error

1:31:18 The son just grew up hating him. And the mother just was getting crushed by the relationship. It's one of the saddest stories I've heard, so I'll finish it quickly. But I know this person very well. And at one point, the mother turned to her son, who was like a teenager, a young teenager, and said, I'm just desperate. Report an error

1:31:39 I'm really desperate. Can you help? Because I'm at the end of my rope. And he's a young kid, you know. He didn't know what to do. Report an error

1:31:50 He wanted to help. He loved his mother. He didn't know what to say. She killed herself. But outside he was a really good man. Report an error

1:32:03 So this person bore that hatred for a very long time. Actually motivated for him for the career he chose. He told me that in public. Report an error

1:32:13 So that one's at that level. That's tough. To actually wish that person well when you see how he damaged you as a youth growing up and damaged his wife to the point that she could not bear her life any longer. Then you know you're getting into deep waters here. If you can develop loving kindness for that person, then that's it. The barriers are down. All the barriers are down. Then you have immeasurable loving kindness. Report an error

1:32:42 When I was a monk in the monastery in Dharamsala, I just became ordained by, and His Holiness, I wanted to become ordained. His Holiness said, okay, this school, this would be a good place for you. It was the Institute of Buddhist Dialectics, or Senyadatta, Senyadatta, as they call it. And so I was in the first class. Report an error

1:33:02 And they had an absolutely marvelous teacher. He was truly exceptional. He was chosen because he was very, very good by the Dalai Lama. Just an absolutely superlative teacher and human being. And I remember asking him as a young monk, what's it mean? You know, we have it in our liturgies, our prayers. It comes up time and time and time again, especially Mahāyāna Buddhism, all sentient beings. Report an error

1:33:24 For the sake of all sentient beings, I shall teach enlightenment. May all sentient beings find happiness in the cause of that. All sentient beings, all sentient beings. Report an error

1:33:33 You know, that was 1973, but back then we also knew there are many galaxies throughout the universe. They're probably populated. On this planet alone, 7 billion, back then maybe more like 6 billion human beings, but that's not counting how many billion animals. And in the Buddhist worldview, then you have all these other realms of pretas and so forth and so on. And I just couldn't wrap my mind around it. It didn't mean anything. It's like an abstraction. Report an error

1:33:56 All sent you being. What am I supposed to really be thinking? What should come to mind when I think all sent you being? Because obviously I can't imagine them. And so I'm imagining nothing. Instead of imagining something like, okay, 50 people, I think I got, this is 50 people, that I can imagine, but all sentient beings? Report an error

1:34:14 What's that, a whole bunch of rooms full of people? What should I think? What should come to mind when we are tending to all sentient beings? And his response was, every sentient being who comes to mind. Everyone you meet, everyone who comes to mind. That would be a good sampling if you just let your mind go open and see who comes to mind. Report an error

1:34:40 And maybe Hitler comes to mind, Dalai Lama comes to mind, next door neighbor, your dog, intestinal parasites, who knows? Report an error

1:34:50 Wide range, what I'm getting is a big spectrum, you know. But he said if you can simply attend to whoever comes to mind, and if you can maintain an evenness, a sense of loving kindness for whoever comes to mind, almost like as if you're taking a poll. You don't interview 100,000 people. You interview 2,000 people who are representative of maybe 6 million. Like when they did the polls just leading to the referendum in Scotland, whether they wanted to be independent. Report an error

1:35:20 I didn't see any poll that was 100,000 people. It's about a little bit less than 6 million people, 6 million Scots. But they would interview or poll 2,000, but very carefully. They say, well, look at 2,000. That's the population in Scotland. Of course it's not, but it was good enough, and the polls turned out to be accurate. And so it's kind of like that. Report an error

1:35:38 If you let your awareness simply open, and then as you're engaging, not only your imagination, but when you're going to work, you're out and about in the city and so forth. You're not going to meet every sense of being. Obviously, you're just in one city, not in every city. But if you can maintain that evenness, that unwavering openness of heart to every person you encounter throughout the course of the day, you've just done that for all sense of being. Report an error

1:36:01 Because you've got a sampling. Now, you may not meet any Gestapo that day, but you might think about Gestapo. We all know what Gestapo did. They may come to mind, that's enough, that's enough. Or the people are cutting off people's heads in Syria. You won't meet them, not in Sydney, not likely, but you hear about them, you read about them, so they come to mind. Report an error

1:36:21 If you can maintain that evenness, even for those who are so deluded, they think that's pleasing in the eyes of God, that we just cut off the head of an AIDS worker. That delusional. If you can feel loving kindness, compassion for a person who is that delusional, you've pretty well got all sentient beings nailed down. Report an error

1:36:40 You've taken care of it. You don't need to see all the rest. That's a good sampling. I found that very helpful. That's why I've mentioned that many, many times, because that was, oh, 41 years ago. Report an error

1:36:57 You finally attend to closely a person who, for one reason or another, you find, this is difficult. This is not easy. And the general shift here, and then we'll take a break, the general shift is to go from discursive to non-discursive meditation. And that is you start in this developmental approach. You're doing something. You're attending to. You're arousing an aspiration and so forth. It starts out discursive. Report an error

1:37:24 And so you keep the meditation going by attending to, bringing to mind the person, the qualities, and arousing, maybe reciting phrases like ones we have here. And then after some time, no telling how long it will take, you'll find something is occurring that's not simply conceptual. Report an error

1:37:43 Conceptual is just like reading a book. I mean, it's just a bunch of lines. It's discursive thoughts, right? But by way of the discursive thoughts, by way of the imagery, the images coming to mind, by way of attending to the person, by way of the images, then there may be a movement. And again, it's not simply an emotion, but it's certainly not unrelated to emotion. And it is an aspiration, a heartfelt aspiration. Report an error

1:38:07 There's a very nice word, caring, a sense of really caring about. With a positive valence. Caring about means, I really do wish you well. I really would love for you to be happy, to be well, flourishing, find the happiness you see. And finding that aspiration, that yearning really is there. That's loving kindness right there. And when you sense that coming up, then you can throttle back a bit on the discursive, keeping it running. Report an error

1:38:35 It's almost like turning a key in ignition. I still have a car that you do that. It's 12 years old. But you turn the key, we all know that, and then when it catches, you don't keep on turning the key, you let go of the key and then the engine's going. In a similar fashion, the discursive meditation where you're thinking this, visualizing that and so forth, that's turning the key in the ignition. Report an error

1:38:55 But when the sense of loving kindness, that aspiration actually is arising, then you can throttle back and release the key. And then you can simply slip into that stream of attending to, attending to in a particular way, and attending to in a way that is loving and kind. Report an error

1:39:14 So parents do this all the time. Good friends do this all the time. People who have a romantic relationship which is deeply, deeply saturated in a genuine sense of caring for each other and not simply sexual attraction. Report an error

1:39:27 But a parent, I mean a mother, holding her child in her arms and simply gazing at the child. No explanation needed, right? You don't need to keep on, may you be well and happy, may you be well and happy. You just don't need to do that. It's kind of like, why are you still talking? Just, you know, it's already happening. And that just is a flow. It's a flow of loving kindness. That's the paradigm right there, the mother for her child. Report an error

1:39:53 That's the paradigm for everybody else. Everybody else. That's a model within the world that we can all see. We all know it's true. That's it. And when that love is there, when it's flowing, the sense of caring, the tenderness, the affection, the warmth, the connectedness, then you just rest in that. And you let it, almost like water that's seeping deep, deep, deep into the soil. Report an error

1:40:14 You just let that benevolence, that kindness, sweetness, just sink deeper, deeper, deeper into your awareness. And that's meditation. The rest is preamble to that. Report an error

1:40:30 Let's take a break. Let's come back at four o 'clock. Report an error

· · ·

1:41:46 I'm very eager to stop talking, so we're going to have a silent session. I invite you to fly solo. Return to this meditative practice from Buddha Gosa. And just follow it as far as you like. You may want to linger for the whole session simply on directing loving kindness for yourself. That would be well spent. You may go out in these concentric circles, but you know it. Report an error

1:42:08 It's all there in the notes. So just play it by ear. And just a couple of themes to bear in mind. And that is, this kind of practice, unless you went to a very different school than I did, this never came up. And I went to church until I was 18, and that never came up there either. Of sitting quietly and engaging in discursive meditation. Report an error

1:42:28 Okay, that's what this is. That's not part of our education, at least not in America. Maybe it's different in Australia. Which means we are learning it rather late in life and it doesn't come so easily for a lot of people. I know a lot of people when they practice Samad, they say, okay, well I'm not great at it, but I know how to do it and it's kind of going okay. And then I try to do discursive meditation where I'm thinking about this directly and I just kind of unravel. Report an error

1:42:50 The mind just goes all over the place, you know, just kind of distraction, like what, what, what? And so it's developing a new skill. It's learning how to think coherently over a sustained period of time. I fancy that. Now Christians do this, and I say this with great respect. Christians will do this. They'll take a passage of scripture, passage of scripture, Old Testament, New Testament, what have you, and they'll be reflecting upon it, reading it slowly and reflecting and reflecting and reflecting as they read. Report an error

1:43:19 Buddhists do that also, of course, and also the Jews and many, many others. So that is a type of discursive meditation. And you have a prop. You have a text in front of you, and that provides you some coherence, a sequence, a kind of a logic to it, a story perhaps, maybe you're reflecting upon a parable, and so on. Report an error

1:43:36 So that we do have. That's part of our tradition. But then not so much part of secular education. I don't remember that ever coming up in secular education. And so, here we are. So what I would suggest, since you don't have a... I mean, you can always look at the notes, of course. They're kind of sketchy there, but that will give you some framework. But what I would suggest here is subtle body, speech, and mind. Report an error

1:43:56 and natural state, spend a few minutes mindfulness of breathing, and then you know where it goes. Self-directed to a loved one, out as far as you wish to go. But at any point in the meditation, if you find you're just kind of caught up in mind-wandering and to kind of let the whole structure is unraveled, then what I would suggest is, well, okay, that's okay. Report an error

1:44:16 That's bound Come back to mindfulness of breathing. Just get centered again. A few breaths. 5, 10, 15 breaths. Don't have to count them. Do if you like. You come back, kind of get your composure back, and then you venture in again. And then again as you're attending, final point, as you're attending to some individual, a loved one, a friend, what have you, and you really do feel that stirring of the heart, that aspiration coming up, that loving kindness, then you may simply attend very closely, you know, like the mother gazing at her child. Report an error

1:44:50 But here it's a little bit more challenging because you have to bear it in your mind's eye. But simply attend to this person. And insofar as the phrases are helpful, you may keep them going. But at some time, almost like if you're on a bike and you get to a point where you can just cruise, you don't need to pedal. When you don't need to pedal, then you just enjoy it. Report an error

1:45:07 Just cruise. What's it called? Coast. Coast. And so that's where you have this fusion of what starts out as discursive meditation and slipping into the more shamanist style. And that's where the deeper transformation takes place. So, that's enough. Let's have 24 minutes silent to find your own posture. Report an error

· · ·

2:11:48 Presented here in Buddhagosa is a classic Theravāda method, that is, it's an interpretation. This particular sequence, the phrases and so forth, I don't believe are found in the Pāli Canon and the actual words of the Buddha. But there is an approach that is directly taken from the Buddha's teachings and I'll just allude to it briefly here and then we'll have a bit of time for discussion. You'll see here on number five, on page five. Report an error

2:12:12 A different approach is in terms of spatial expansion. The practice starts with those in one's immediate environment, such as family, then extends to neighboring houses, street, town, country, and then just expanding in all directions. So it's kind of just creating an expanding field of benevolence. And so in this room, for example, we won't do it right now, but this is very easy to understand. Report an error

2:12:36 You can do it on your own. Whereas you start from yourself, just this well-wishing, just like in the Mettā Sutta, the Buddhist discourse on loving kindness. You start there and you start with this nucleus of your own presence in the world. And then you extend the people to the left and right, in front and back of you, and then extending out. Report an error

2:12:55 And just including an expanding field, like a bubble that expands, a field of awareness, a field of benevolence. And again, with each out-breath, if you'd like to set a rhythm to it, with every out-breath, simply sending these aspirations, these thoughts, benevolence, altruism, out in all directions. Report an error

2:13:16 And so the pervasion of the directions in this, one's thought of loving-kindness, one's aspirations of loving-kindness are directed first to the East. Actually, in front of you, in Buddhist visualizations, east is always in front of you, whatever direction you're facing, at least in Vajrayana. So east, so the west here goes west, and normally go clockwise. Report an error

2:13:39 So east, and then south, west, north. The intermediate directions, northeast and so forth, up and down. And so basically just creating a field. Report an error

2:13:56 And so in other words, a direct quote of the Buddha. Here amongst the disciples dwells, pervading one direction with his heart filled with loving kindness. Likewise, the second, so the east, west, however you want to break that up, each of the directions, the second, the third, the fourth direction, so above, below and around, he dwells pervading the entire world, everywhere and equally, with his heart filled with loving kindness, abundant, grown great, measureless, free from enmity and free from distress. Report an error

2:14:26 That really captures the essence of it. And you see, it's not necessarily tied to any particular worldview. You could do this practice as a very devout theist, monotheist, polytheist, agnostic. Report an error

2:14:38 So it's just there. So that's a practice. The concluding section we'll look at tomorrow morning. One story is kind of lingering in my mind. We'll just tell that story and then we'll open it up for discussion. It's a nice story. I suspect it's true. I believe it is true, actually. But it's of Milarepa, the great yogi, about a thousand years ago. Report an error

2:14:58 An extraordinary story. Many of you know it already, but there's one story you may or may not know. But Milarepa having gained very profound realization. And he lived just as a hermit up in caves. And he lived in caves all over the Himalayan region, the southern Himalayan region, just meditating up there. And a hunter was out hunting a deer. Report an error

2:15:19 He had a hound, a hunting dog. And the hunting dog, his dog was doing what the dog was supposed to do, and that was chase the deer down until it just was exhausted. And the dog would chew it up or the hunter would come and finish it off with his bow and arrow. And so they're out there in the wild, it's an incredibly wild country to bed. Report an error

2:15:42 So the dog is yowling and baying and running the deer and the deer is just panting back on his last legs. And Milarepa sees this and he's just meditating, meditating, just a field of loving kindness to everyone there, the hunter, the dog, the deer, just generating this field of loving kindness. And somehow the deer picked this up. And the deer just ran over to Malarepa, sitting quietly in his cave. And the deer just ran and just collapsed at his feet. Report an error

2:16:13 Malarepa is just contained. Report an error

2:16:19 And then the dog is coming, yowling, yowling. A ferocious dog. They have very ferocious dogs in Tibet. And the dog comes running behind. But the closer he gets to Malarepa, then the gentle ape comes. And then by the time he gets there, the dog just lies down next to Malarepa. The hunt was finished. And then the hunter comes and he sees this. Report an error

2:16:44 Doggone yogis. He tamed his dog. He didn't want that. He didn't want a lap dog. And so the Tibetan hunters, they could be very tough people. They weren't all spiritual. So he takes out his arrow. He wants to skewer. He's really pissed. He's really pissed. He doesn't mind skewering a yogi. He takes out his bow and looses the arrow to skewer that doggone yogi that wrecked his hunt. Oddly enough, the arrow can hear just swerve. Report an error

2:17:17 He takes on the Nama and swerves him. So then he comes up to him. He's going to really accost this yogi that he screwed up his whole hunt. Report an error

2:17:26 But the closer he got, the mellower he got. And by the time he got to him, then he was mellowed. And he just asked him for teaching. Report an error

2:17:38 So, leave it literally, metaphorically. I actually think it's probably true. I think it is true. It creates a space. And love is a very powerful force of nature. Report an error

2:17:50 So we have about 20 minutes. Any questions or comments coming up, we'll start with... Okay, since I've already said yes, but after Himati, people have not had a hand up. One more day. Then tonight, any hands up, free for all. Go ahead, Himata. Report an error

2:18:25 It Report an error

2:18:31 is. It is for a while. But actually, it's not discursive as such. Simply directing your attention here and there as such is not discursive. Discursive means there really is some commentary going. And it's called jet gom in Tibetan, which means analytical. And so it's usually translated literally as analytical meditation. But that's not really quite accurate, even though it's literally accurate. Report an error

2:18:58 Because the meditation of bodhicitta, the meditative cultivation of bodhicitta, it's not really analysis. When you think of all sentient beings as a mother and reflecting upon their kindness, what are you analyzing? It's not a problem. You're reflecting upon, you're discursively engaging with, you're reflecting upon, you're bringing memory, imagination to bear. So even though it's technically correct, I think it's actually discursive meditation. Report an error

2:19:21 But discursive meditation as such does entail, by definition, a real kind of conceptual engagement with, a reflecting upon. Just like Christians, they will call it meditation. I'm meditating upon this passage of scripture. That's good. We call that discursive meditation. It's not so much to learn something new, because they probably, you know, Christians will read the same passage 20 times. It's not that you're trying new information here, but by seeping your mind in it, reflectively engaging with it, conceptually, cognitively engaging with it, then it goes in deeper, deeper, deeper, and then that starts to shift worldview, shifts the way you attend to other people, deepen your connection with the divine, and so on. Report an error

2:19:59 So it's like that. So in this practice we've not done, actually, we can. Maybe do it tomorrow morning. In fact, I think we will do it tomorrow. The spatial approach. The simple fact that you're directing your attention here, directing your attention there, simply the directing of attention is not by nature, it's not already discursive, because it doesn't necessarily have a commentary. Report an error

2:20:21 But when, again, taking this classical one, the mother attending closely, that is focusing her eyes, but also her heart, her mind, giving her full attention to her beloved child holding in her arms, she is directing your attention. But that doesn't have to be discursive. It's a directing of attention. There's her child sleeping slightly. Maybe the child's gazing back up. That's not discursive. Report an error

2:20:44 That's not discursive. When the commentary starts coming in, that would be called discursive. And so if one has aroused this heart of loving kindness, which can happen, you know, it can happen in romance also, but just in friendship. Just in friendship. Two friends, sometimes just in a silence, you know, just gazing and two friends just sitting across from the table. Report an error

2:21:06 And just feeling the warmth. I don't think I need more words. But it doesn't have a commentary by just gazing. We actually do it a lot. And so that's when it's non-discursive. And so if that heart, that fullness, that connectedness and so forth, that warmth, that caring, when that is there, then just with that heart, then you just kind of expand the field. Report an error

2:21:33 And insofar as the practice is working, then whoever comes into the field is now kind of embraced in that field. So we're not going to call that discursiveness. It can actually be a kind of a shamatha. That is, you're maintaining the stability, the continuity, the clarity, but without the commentary. Report an error

2:21:50 I'll linger just with one word here. It's a really good word, and I think it's very important at this point. It came up in one of the Mind on Life conferences, and I think it was the one, Destructive Emotions in the year 2000 with Paul Ekman. He's a very fine scientist. But I remember that this is so germane, very, very germane to all of these four measures, and I'll just mention it now. I don't want to forget it. Report an error

2:22:11 The question came up. For us human beings, what's our deepest impulse, kind of our root drive, fundamental drive? And so clearly there have been a lot of intelligent thought that's gone to that question. Dalai Lama was not the first one to raise it. So if we go to Freud, for example, I think we'll find the libido and death wish. Report an error

2:22:35 Very, very deep. Very, very deep. If we go to Darwin, survive, procreate. Pretty well wraps it up. Other people, Athiyas may say, well, maybe it's the search for God. That's our deepest drive, the search for God. Athiyas might very well say that, I think. The Dalai Lama is interesting. So he raised this question. I don't know, I can't remember. I was a co-translator for the conference, but I don't remember who raised the question. Report an error

2:23:00 Not terribly important. But the question came up, and his response was interesting. I'd never heard it before, although I'd been studying for quite a few years, 30 years by then. And his response was, well, I think our fundamental drive, and I think I was probably translating because I remember grappling with the word and thinking, okay, what's the best word? And he said our deepest impulse, from his perspective, is a very, very knowledgeable and experienced Buddhist, is, and he said the word Tsewa. Report an error

2:23:26 Tsewa. It's not loving kindness and it's not compassion. But Tsewa, and I was rolling that around, okay, I knew what it meant. How do we find the word? Okay, I got it. Caring. Caring. It's a simple term. But caring. He said, that's our deepest one. And that is when you touch a hot stove and your flesh is burning. Report an error

2:23:52 You don't have much choice in the matter. You care. You don't want it to burn anymore. And when something really pleasant comes up, whether it's bliss or this kind of sheer upsurge of blissful creativity coming up, you care. This person's mother who committed suicide, she was really desperate to be freed of the suffering she was experiencing. She cared. Report an error

2:24:16 And that was the only... There was no exit strategy she could imagine at that time. There was no help. And so she did that out of a sense of caring. And then the son, who felt, I think, a tremendous burden of guilt, he was probably wracking his brain, if I'd said this, if I'd only done this, if I could have said this, maybe I could have helped her. Report an error

2:24:36 Well, why? Because he cares. He cares. And then the most vile things that are done in human history. People always have a reason. Whatever they do, there's always a justification for it. They have a reason. And it's because they care. They want to reshape Europe. They want to purify the, oh, what do they say, whatever the delusional thing they say, the impure strains, the non-Oriens, or just whatever people do. Report an error

2:25:03 They want to convert everybody to their own belief system. Why? Because they care. And so the caring impulse, why people have children, why people commit suicide, why people strive for enlightenment, why they engage in genocide. It's always because we care about something and we can't help it. We can't help it. It's not voluntary. Even the person who commits suicide is doing something as a voluntary act because of caring. Report an error

2:25:28 I want to be free of something. So I think actually I find myself really resonating with that. This fundamental impulse of caring. If you're hungry, you can't not care about that. If you're really cold, you can't not care about that. And if someone you care about, if they, if someone else you care, and they're suffering. Report an error

2:25:49 And you care about them, then you care about their suffering. You want to free them. If they're looking for happiness, you care. And so it's really deeply ingrained. And of course, it's not unique to human beings at all. It's actually core, he was suggesting, to sentient beings. Sentient beings, the whole bandwidth. But now when that fundamental impulse of caring is there, and we see some possible good outcome, some happiness, some pleasure, something good, and we aspire for it. Report an error

2:26:16 That there's some happiness and I think I see the way to do it. I think I see the way to actualize it. And we call that loving kindness. That's a positive evidence. You could be happy. Maybe I could help you be happy in some way. And that's loving kindness. Whereas when we see there's suffering and it's someone we care about, then the natural information comes up, aspirational, but how can you be free? Report an error

2:26:37 And so that root of caring can spring out into loving kindness. It can spring out into the derivative of compassion. In terms of these noble virtues, but then also we just go right back to the root. If that impulse of caring comes out and we see something, I think that would make me happy, I need some, I think that thermos there, I think I would really like a thermos like that. Report an error

2:26:59 Then I'm caring, I want that, I want that. So caring can then manifest as craving and attachment. And of course caring can also then manifest afflictively as aversion, as hostility, as hatred, as malice, and all the stuff that flows from that. But that really, that resonates with me a lot. Report an error

2:27:20 For what it's worth, it's really fundamental to all four of the four emotions. Yes, please. Report an error

2:27:37 Susan? Easy, thank you. One Report an error

2:27:45 of the motivations about my practice, Report an error

2:27:53 I manage to have a very clear focus on my breath. And at the same time, it's like there's a slide that drops behind it. So whilst I'm maintaining focus, there is something else going on as well. I just missed that. A duality, yes, yes, yes. Right, right. Yep. Chloroform. Report an error

2:28:27 Chloroform. Yeah. Do you have chloroform? Report an error

2:28:44 Yeah. That I recognize. Report an error

2:28:58 Yep. Yep. I think we want to stop there because I'm trying to hold this on. That's one of the Americans. colourful Report an error

· · ·

2:28:50 sometimes I feel almost Report an error

2:29:06 You're describing what it's like to practice shamatha. Report an error

2:29:13 And so let's just parse that out a little bit. In the practice shamatha, whether it's mindfulness of breathing or we will explore other methods during these six days as well, there's something called coarse excitation. So some of this, precision of this actually can be very helpful. There's not precision for the sake of precision. So when coarse excitation sets in when you're doing the practice, this means a thought or some other stimulation. Report an error

2:29:36 It could be a sound, but mostly it's a thought, especially in a quiet environment. A thought comes up. Now, like with the chloroform, it catches you unaware, and as it carries you away, as if it threw you in the trunk and just drove off, you've completely forgotten. When coarse excitation has captured your attention, you've completely forgotten your meditative object. You're just not aware of the breathing at all, because the whole force of your awareness has been carried away. Report an error

2:30:02 So that's called coarse excitation. But then there's, as one goes deeper into the practice, relaxes more deeply, It gets more into a kind of quality of flow that you really feel you're on the breath. Let's say, for example, at the apertures of the nostrils. You may feel, no, I'm breathing in, I'm breathing out, I'm here. Report an error

2:30:20 But there's also, as you said, this veil, almost like a swarm of gnats, little bugs around your head. And they're there, so you have this ongoing commentary, chitchat, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, noise, conceptual noise going on. And in fact, the noise may be sometimes so loud, the attention is more focusing on the noise, but kind of holding a pinky on the meditative object. Almost like you're humoring the meditative object. Report an error

2:30:44 So you're going, blah, blah, blah, blah, yeah, I got you. Blah, blah, blah, blah, yeah, yeah, you're boring. Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. You know, that's called medium excitation. You're not, experientially, you don't have the sense of completely disengaging, totally forgetting the meditative object, but you're actually attending to more interesting things. Report an error

2:31:01 Or at least something that's not just in-breath, out-breath. And so that's called medium excitation. And then subtle excitation you can probably anticipate. You're really mostly on the object. You really feel, yeah, I am attending. But again, that kind of haze, that background noise of chit-chat, images flickering in and out. Report an error

2:31:21 Just kind of like I'm tuned to like a radio station. I'm on the radio station. We've all this. I'm in old radios, I remember. Remember old radios? That weren't digitally all fixed alone. You're on the station, but you hear the other station. And you're hearing your station loud and clear. You're definitely on that station, but you do have that static. Report an error

2:31:41 Maybe it's a voice commentary or something, or just sheer static. And that's called subtle excitation. So, gradients. And when you're really going very deeply into samādhi, then it's a clear signal. Just a clear signal. Crystal clear, and only one signal coming through. And that's what you're attending to in your meditative practice. Report an error

2:31:58 So that's the diagnosis of it. The terminology can be helpful. So you recognize it. You recognize there's nothing odd or anomalous about what you're experiencing. And then the solution, because that's what we need, not just to diagnose the problem. And overall, now there are many, many, many, many remedies, methods to apply to counteract coarse, medium and subtle excitation, not just one. But in the Dzogchen tradition that I've been kind of immersed in for the last 24 years, there is one response that is overwhelmingly encouraged. Report an error

2:32:27 And for a really good reason, it tends to work. If you get good at it, you have to learn how to use it, like any other tool. But if you do, it tends to work really well. Report an error

2:32:37 And that is when you're on the object, let's say you've got this medium excitation, because I sense that's what you're referring to, and it's there. The remedy for excitation is, Report an error

2:32:56 so your awareness is just so smooth, so loose, it becomes kind of like Teflon. So the thoughts come in and they like to pull at you. But this is my little gimmick. This is my tool. Show and tell. There used to be some Velcro right here, which then would close, right? Velcro follow. So this is shamatha pair. This is a shamatha eyeglass carrier. Because, you know, the distracting thought comes, and you really like to stick. Report an error

2:33:27 There's no Velcro. So the thoughts come, and they come, and they come, but you're so loose, so slick, so light. They come, and they can't pull you. There's nothing to... So there's Velcro here. So the Velcro, the thoughts are sticky, but your awareness isn't sticky. One side sticky is not enough. So that's it. And it's just doing that more and more deeply and more and more finely as you go from coarse, medium to subtle excitation. Bring greater finesse to it, greater subtlety to it. Report an error

2:34:00 Deeper, deeper, subtler, subtler sense of just ease, of looseness. And when you get good at it, I'll tell you what happens. They come. The thoughts, images, memories and so forth, they come. Even the emotions and desires, they come. And as soon as they come, they're orphaned. That is, they're not owned. Report an error

2:34:18 They're not possessed. You didn't identify with them. You don't even have a sense they're yours. They just happen in your space. They just come up. But because they're orphaned, because there's not even a trace of clinging, identification, grasping onto my thought, me, none of that. They just come and they come and they... Report an error

2:34:37 I'm very kindly put up at the NovoTel on Darling Harbor. In Sydney. And the night before I left, they had this big, big fireworks display. It went on and on and on. And we all know what it's like, the fireworks. So you see it goes, and it poof, like that. But then nobody needs to... Have you ever seen a fireworks display where they bring it... And then they spray it with a fire hose? Not necessary, right? Report an error

2:35:02 Like, it's fire! No, everybody knows. They did it over the bay, of course, so there was no problem. But they come up. It's just a nice image. And it's a very close image. And some of the fireworks are really big and some are swizzly and some go all over the place. But there's one thing they all have in common. They all release themselves. They don't stay. Report an error

2:35:23 None of the fireworks just kind of stay like painted on the sky. They come up and then without anybody doing anything to them, they come and then they're gone. Report an error

2:35:33 Just like that. It's very close. Space of the mind, thoughts, images, emotion, desires coming up and swizzling and bursting and doing all kinds of shenanigans. And then they just... Release themselves. And all the while, when you really kind of get adept at this, it's a skill to be cultivated, but all the while when you're doing that, your awareness remains like that. Report an error

2:35:55 Still. Very clear. Still, but unmoved. And how does that happen? Release of grasping. So that's how you can remedy that problem. And it keeps on going. You keep on doing the same thing on subtle and subtle levels. Now as for the other aspect, you've just identified attention hyperactivity and attention deficit. Report an error

2:36:14 Because the second one, where you're kind of meditating, Kind of not, there's a nice word called sleepitating. Report an error

2:36:27 Kind of dreamy. Not really pleasant, but kind of pleasant. Kind of cozy. That's called dullness. That's called dullness. It's a technical term. And for that, when that sets in, it's really not a good habit to make. It could not make that habitual. Because habits stick, whether they're good habits, bad habits. And if one makes a habit of kind of just going into a dreamy, nebulous, unfocused state, not helpful. Report an error

2:36:58 That's not a good habit to cultivate. Certainly not meditation, but kind of not anything else either. And so when you see that you're kind of losing the edge, that the clarity is starting to subside, getting a bit spacey, nebulous, dreamy, like that, then you've got, I would suggest two options. And one is, I think I'm just too sleepy to do this. Report an error

2:37:19 In this case, take a break, take a nap, go for a walk, have a cup of tea, whatever you like, but do something else, read something, but there's no reason to hang out there, it's not useful. So you say, okay, this is not working. Okay, that's fine, no problem. Then stop. But if you really like to meditate, and you're really not tired, but nevertheless slipping into this kind of dreamy, nebulous state, then you might recall the little three R's. Report an error

2:37:43 The three R's for excitation are relax, release, return. And the three R's for... In response to dullness and laxity are refresh. And that is, if you listen to the Dharma talks, read the notes and so forth in Sharmatta, it might come to you that this could be really important. This might be something really worth doing to develop attention skills to some depth. That could be really valuable. Not only for following a path to enlightenment, but just for everything. Report an error

2:38:16 In your interpersonal relationships, for work, for play, getting a good night's sleep. It's really valuable. But it's not going to happen if one takes a lackadaisical, complacent approach to it. One shouldn't expect anything from that. And so then one may refresh the interest. You may take out half a minute or so and say, what was the reason for doing this again? Is this just a way to kill time? Report an error

2:38:42 Oh, no, I remember. This actually could be very meaningful in so many different ways. Yeah, I think I'd really, okay, I'm going to restart. I'm going to reboot right now. I'm interested in this practice. I'd like to... Go along this path further. Explore it. This is a great adventure here. So refresh your interest. Why are you doing this? Have a clear idea. Why? Report an error

2:39:00 And why now? And then once you've refreshed your interest, some aspiration there, some confidence, I think I can do this. I think this might really turn out well. Then you return, refresh, restore. I said restore. Restore the flow of attention, which has kind of got dissipated. So regroup, restore it. Report an error

2:39:21 And then, once you're back on the target, they say, okay, now I'm here, but I don't want to just immediately space out again. I'm going to retain. So refresh, restore, and then retain. And that's how you can overcome the dullness. Report an error

2:39:59 I think I would really see what you said, that I'm probably... how long it would have taken to reach high levels. when I hear I'm talking about other comments, guess what I'm hoping is that even though I may not progress the steps of... Report an error

2:40:29 meaningfully engaged in and kindness on maybe not as deep a little as what some of you has come further up. I guess what I'm saying is I'm thinking about living here and I'm like, okay, I may not have your own and been there to practice this. This is a really good... Context for that question, because if this were kind of a really gung-ho shamatha retreat. Report an error

2:41:02 You know, just shamatha all the way through. That's all we're doing. And then if you're going back to a husband and children and fully engaged way of life and so forth and so on, and you say, all right, I'll be able to meditate for about an hour a day most days, but sometimes, you know, just obligations come in and I can't do it. Report an error

2:41:17 What are my chances of progressing along the path of shamatha, stages four, eight, nine, achieving shamatha, in this mode of life where I'm practicing formally about an hour? I'd have to say, well, not that great. Right? right? Report an error

2:41:32 Because to really progress along the path of shamatha requires at the very least a very contemplative way of life. Not necessarily meditating 8, 10, 12 hours a day, but a very contemplative way of life. Quite simple, very grounded, not a whole lot of activation of the conceptual mind and so forth. Then even if one's not meditating many hours a day, there's a real chance of progressing meaningfully. Report an error

2:41:54 But if you're just by the nature of living in modernity, there's email, there's so many demands on the time, and maybe children and spouse and relatives and work and vacations and so forth, then in terms of straight shamatha, you'll probably not progress all that far. Having said that, insofar as you do practice, that may really bring a great deal of much more sense of relaxation, of composure and clarity to everything you do. Report an error

2:42:18 In which case, don't worry about stages one, two, three, four. Consider about the other 16 hours that you're awake every day, if you sleep for seven hours, 16 hours of not meditating, but just see how that can be, the whole of those 16 hours can be seasoned by these qualities of awareness that you cultivate for the one hour. Report an error

2:42:36 Now that's a good investment. And don't worry about stages and levels and all that. But when it comes to these four, and that's one reason I really love teaching this in any context. These four, well in a way, you know, when we're out and about engaging with sentient beings, all sentient beings, every day all sentient beings, right? Every day I'm meeting all sentient beings, because that includes everyone I met, so I just met all sentient beings today. Report an error

2:42:59 It was tomorrow, it's going to be another set of all sentient beings, and the next day another set of all sentient beings. But we, at least by way of media and so forth, we get a pretty good bandwidth. That's the advantage of not living in medieval times in a village where you meet, you know, only people within a ten mile radius for your whole life. Report an error

2:43:14 Well, we have a much broader bandwidth here because of the media. And so we hear all kinds of things. I follow the news pretty carefully. And so I hear the most horrific things happening and also what the media can cover. And so in this regard, the sky's the limit. The sky's the limit. In terms of, well, okay, there you are, you're not spending many years, many, many hours each day, and you have other obligations. Report an error

2:43:41 But now tell me the activity. That you're engaging in, where you can say, well, in this practice, when I'm doing this, I simply can't practice any of the four. Can't do loving-kindness, compassion, empathy, or joy-equanimity. No, no, no, no way. I don't think there is such a thing. It can be practiced in any context. And so in this regard, there's no upper limit. It's helpful, though, not to set expectations and then find that you're not meeting them. Report an error

2:44:07 Best way to practice, final word, and we'll offer our evening break, is... Rather than setting, this is what really good meditators do. This is, you know, this is Milarepa, this is Gyanam Rimba, this is blah, blah, blah, you know. And I'm down here. I don't find that helpful. I like to cite great yogis of the past. It's inspiring. But not so I can feel inferior. That's not why I do it. Report an error

2:44:30 Am I on that level? No. But I don't walk around thinking, I'm not Milarepa, I'm not Milarepa. Why do that? It's like thinking, I'm not as compassionate as the Dalai Lama. Well, okay, get over it. You know? So? Not many people are, so why are you talking that way? Just from moment to moment, practice. And know that you're practicing well, know you're practicing correctly, take satisfaction in it, and know that's how you become. Report an error

2:44:55 That's how you proceed, by in the moment practicing as well as you can, taking delight in that, and then just doing it. And then see what unfolds all by itself. Report an error

2:45:07 Good. Enjoy your evening. I'll see you at 7 o 'clock. Report an error

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Talk by B. Alan Wallace. Original at Vajrayana Institute via Internet Archive: https://archive.org/details/BAWFourImmeasurables. Licensed CC BY-NC-ND 3.0. Transcript generated automatically and may contain errors; the audio is the authoritative version.

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