Buddhism from A-Z, 2nd Semester - Bodhicitta: Developing the Big Heart (16 March 2010)

0:01 Thank you. Report an error in the passage at 0:01 Highlight the passage at 0:01

0:18 Yeah, that could be made there with a little shuffle thing is. That's what I was saying. I think it's a funny way to access it. Yeah. No, it's just a button. Report an error in the passage at 0:18 Highlight the passage at 0:18

0:47 could be, because you have the 3G. Yeah, okay. Report an error in the passage at 0:47 Highlight the passage at 0:47

0:55 have that. Report an error in the passage at 0:55 Highlight the passage at 0:55

· · · silence, 1 minute

1:31 Thank you. Report an error in the passage at 1:31 Highlight the passage at 1:31

1:43 you're not on anything Report an error in the passage at 1:43 Highlight the passage at 1:43

1:56 A few Report an error in the passage at 1:56 Highlight the passage at 1:56

· · · silence, 1 minute

2:52 extra copies. Report an error in the passage at 2:52 Highlight the passage at 2:52

2:58 Joe, I haven't heard anything. Hopefully that's a good thing. Yeah, I just emailed him today to find him because I haven't heard from Report an error in the passage at 2:58 Highlight the passage at 2:58

3:12 him. Yeah, so he's on the East Coast, and so his mother had open heart surgery this past week. Yeah, it's easier to visualize when you have an idea of where it is. But yeah, Report an error in the passage at 3:12 Highlight the passage at 3:12

3:29 I'll let you know if I hear something. Report an error in the passage at 3:29 Highlight the passage at 3:29

3:36 So we have some technical difficulties today, but I actually have a handout today, so we'll have something to look at. So let's start with a couple of minutes of silence and a little bit of meditation. Report an error in the passage at 3:36 Highlight the passage at 3:36

4:02 Meditate on the breath and try Report an error in the passage at 4:02 Highlight the passage at 4:02

4:08 not to follow the busy mind, the monkey mind. Try Report an error in the passage at 4:08 Highlight the passage at 4:08

4:19 to stay attentive. Report an error in the passage at 4:19 Highlight the passage at 4:19

· · · silence, 1 minute

5:24 of all sentient beings around us. Report an error in the passage at 5:24 Highlight the passage at 5:24

5:39 they've all been our mothers. Report an error in the passage at 5:39 Highlight the passage at 5:39

5:43 our best friend or our father's. the person who's been kindest to us. Report an error in the passage at 5:43 Highlight the passage at 5:43

· · · silence, 1 minute

6:25 of each person we've encountered today. Report an error in the passage at 6:25 Highlight the passage at 6:25

6:30 And all Report an error in the passage at 6:30 Highlight the passage at 6:30

· · · silence, 1 minute

7:56 these Report an error in the passage at 7:56 Highlight the passage at 7:56

· · · silence, 1 minute

9:23 beings are stuck in saṃsāra Report an error in the passage at 9:23 Highlight the passage at 9:23

9:46 control over the future. Report an error in the passage at 9:46 Highlight the passage at 9:46

9:52 I'm carried by the winds of karma. I Report an error in the passage at 9:52 Highlight the passage at 9:52

· · · silence, 1 minute

10:33 think I have to save all these beings, these kind sentient beings from saṃsāra, prison. To Report an error in the passage at 10:33 Highlight the passage at 10:33

10:58 do that, I need to attain enlightenment to remove my mental afflictions. I Report an error in the passage at 10:58 Highlight the passage at 10:58

11:09 can best help others. Report an error in the passage at 11:09 Highlight the passage at 11:09

· · · silence, 1 minute

11:57 Okay, we'll start with the praise to Manjushri on page 84. Report an error in the passage at 11:57 Highlight the passage at 11:57

12:21 Obey sense to my guru and protector Manjushri. Who holds to his heart a scriptural text symbolic of his seeing all things as they are. Whose understanding shines forth as the sun unclouded by defilements or traces of ignorance. Who teaches in sixty ways with a patient love of a father for his only son. All creatures caught in the prison of saṃsāra, confused in the darkness of their ignorance, overwhelmed by their suffering. Report an error in the passage at 12:21 Highlight the passage at 12:21

12:48 You, whose dragon thunder proclamation of the Dharma arouses us from the stupor of our delusions and frees us from the iron chains of our karma, whose powerful sword of wisdom hues down suffering wherever its sprouts appear, clearing away the darkness of all ignorance, whose princely body is adorned with 112 marks of a Buddha, who has completed the ten stages achieving the highest perfection of a bodhisattva, who has been pure from the beginning. Report an error in the passage at 12:48 Highlight the passage at 12:48

13:16 O Manjushri, all loving one, with the brilliance of your wisdom, illuminate the darkness in closing my mind. Enlighten my intelligence and wisdom so that I may gain insight into Buddha's words and the texts that explain them. Report an error in the passage at 13:16 Highlight the passage at 13:16

13:40 And Report an error in the passage at 13:40 Highlight the passage at 13:40

13:46 then Report an error in the passage at 13:46 Highlight the passage at 13:46

13:56 refuge in bodhicitta. omarapatsanadi omarapatsanadi Report an error in the passage at 13:56 Highlight the passage at 13:56

13:59 On page 88 at the bottom, Report an error in the passage at 13:59 Highlight the passage at 13:59

14:10 I go for refuge until I'm enlightened to the Buddha, the Dharma and the Supreme Assembly. By the merits I create through listening to the Dharma, may I become a Buddha in order to benefit all sentient beings. I go for refuge until I'm enlightened to the Buddha, the Dharma and the Supreme Assembly. By the merits I create through listening to the Dharma, may I become a Buddha in order to benefit all sentient beings. Report an error in the passage at 14:10 Highlight the passage at 14:10

14:36 I go for refuge until I'm enlightened to the Buddha, the Dharma and the Supreme Assembly. By the merits I create through listening to the Dharma, may I become a Buddha in order to benefit all sentient beings. Report an error in the passage at 14:36 Highlight the passage at 14:36

14:58 It was nice to see most of you actually at Guy Newland's teachings this past weekend. It was intense, but it was wonderful. I think most of you would agree that it was wonderful. It was, yeah. Report an error in the passage at 14:58 Highlight the passage at 14:58

15:16 I think it's very, very rare to get those kind of teachings in English on that level, that quality. So we're really fortunate. We have some good karma. And that also gives you a flavor of what we're going to be covering later on when we get to the special insight section, probably later on this year. Report an error in the passage at 15:16 Highlight the passage at 15:16

15:40 Not the simple, basic presentation on emptiness. We get into some meaty stuff because Tsongkhapa was dispelling the misconceptions of the people in Tibet in his day. So he was clarifying all of the difficult points about emptiness. So that's why the teaching this weekend was intense. It wasn't just a basic presentation. It was messing with our minds. Report an error in the passage at 15:40 Highlight the passage at 15:40

16:18 Okay, so since I'm not able to get the projector to work at the moment, pass out this, because today we're going to cover the precepts of aspirational bodhicitta. It's Report an error in the passage at 16:18 Highlight the passage at 16:18

16:53 turning on, but it's not, the projector and the computer aren't talking to each other. It's not displaying what's on the computer. And there's something wrong with the... Report an error in the passage at 16:53 Highlight the passage at 16:53

17:09 Connector cord, whatever you call that. So we may not have to get a new cord because there's like one or two teeth missing on it and that might be the problem. But Report an error in the passage at 17:09 Highlight the passage at 17:09

17:25 we'll try a little bit later to get it to work again. So we've gone through the various methods for developing bodhicitta, the sevenfold cause and effect, the exchanging self with others, equalizing exchanging self and others, and then the combined method. With the 11 steps. And then last time we talked about the ritual. The ritual for developing aspirational bodhicitta. Report an error in the passage at 17:25 Highlight the passage at 17:25

17:55 Because there are two types of bodhicitta. Wait, before we get there, what's bodhicitta? Report an error in the passage at 17:55 Highlight the passage at 17:55

18:06 Yeah, the wish to achieve enlightenment for the sake of all beings. And then the two types of bodhicitta are aspirational and engaging bodhicitta. So what's the difference between those two? And let's use the microphone. Report an error in the passage at 18:06 Highlight the passage at 18:06

18:30 Effie. Effie had her hand up behind you. So what was the aspirational first, right? So contrived bodhicitta where we do a meditation and we work ourselves up to it artificially. Okay. That's contrived versus uncontrived bodhicitta. Yes. So that's one division of bodhicitta. And then the other one is aspirational versus engaging bodhicitta. Report an error in the passage at 18:30 Highlight the passage at 18:30

19:01 Does anybody know the difference? Okay. This is good because this is pretty important. I would say aspiring would be the wish and then engaging is the commitment that you will. Will? Kind of. Almost. You were right with the first part. The aspiration is the wish. Engaging would be the action, right? Report an error in the passage at 19:01 Highlight the passage at 19:01

19:33 Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, it's like, okay, Chris, you try. So we're all getting part of it. Engaging is when you have the wish nonstop and you put it into action. You just you live it, you know. So what I thought it was was aspirational was kind of like you have to meditate on it to to think or to have the aspiration. Report an error in the passage at 19:33 Highlight the passage at 19:33

20:00 But then when you have engaging bodhicitta, it's just it's permanently there in your mind stream. You've got it and you can't let it go. Okay. That's actually getting back to contrived versus uncontrived. Yeah, uncontrived is when you have it without effort. Report an error in the passage at 20:00 Highlight the passage at 20:00

20:23 While I'm passing the mic, I'll ask a question. No, wait, wait, wait. Let's answer this one first. Okay. I don't think it'll mess anything up. Report an error in the passage at 20:23 Highlight the passage at 20:23

20:35 Well, let me get an answer to this first and then you can ask your question. Okay, Rose. Report an error in the passage at 20:35 Highlight the passage at 20:35

20:42 I was thinking the first one is the lay person who does the wish and then the other one is the person who really becomes a priest or monastic and does a request to really follow the precepts. Report an error in the passage at 20:42 Highlight the passage at 20:42

21:10 We're getting close, but it doesn't have anything to do with whether or not we're lay or monastic. And then Peter. Don't you have to be at a certain level on the bodhisattva grounds before you have uncontrived bodhicitta? Yeah, but we're not talking about uncontrived bodhicitta right now. Uncontrived bodhicitta brings us to the Mahayata path accumulation. Engaged bodhicitta is when you've taken the bodhisattva vows and you've made the commitment to do it. Report an error in the passage at 21:10 Highlight the passage at 21:10

21:40 No, she said monastic. That's different. No, no, you take the Vinaya vows to become a monastic. We can all take bodhisattva vows, lay people and monastics. There's three levels of vows, the individual liberation or the Pratimoksha vows, which are like the monastic vows or the five lay vows that we take, right? Report an error in the passage at 21:40 Highlight the passage at 21:40

22:02 And then there are bodhisattva vows and tantric vows. So bodhisattva vows can be taken by lay people or monastics. Report an error in the passage at 22:02 Highlight the passage at 22:02

22:11 Yes, so aspiring bodhicitta, as Jeannie was saying, is the wish to attain enlightenment. And then engaged bodhicitta is saying, okay, not only do I have the wish, I'm going to practice the six perfections, I'm taking the bodhisattva vows, and you take the bodhisattva vows basically until you become enlightened. Report an error in the passage at 22:11 Highlight the passage at 22:11

22:32 So it's like the difference between... Wishing to go to Tibet and buying the ticket and actually getting on the plane and going there. Like we have, right, if you want to go to Tibet. So aspiring bodhicitta is wishing, but you can have the wish without doing anything about it, right? So that's aspiring bodhicitta. Report an error in the passage at 22:32 Highlight the passage at 22:32

22:56 Engaged bodhicitta is, okay, I have the wish, I'm going to take the bodhisattva vows, and I'm going to practice the six perfections. Generosity. Ethics, patience, joyous effort, concentration and wisdom. So last time we were talking about aspiring bodhicitta, like you have the wish to attain enlightenment for the welfare of all sentient beings. Report an error in the passage at 22:56 Highlight the passage at 22:56

23:24 We haven't taken the bodhisattva vows, we have the wish to attain enlightenment, which is what you develop when you go through the sevenfold cause and effect, etc. Okay? Report an error in the passage at 23:24 Highlight the passage at 23:24

23:37 So we have the wish and then with the wish we can either just keep it as a wish or if we feel committed then we can take the ritual for aspiring bodhicitta where you take the vow never to give up your aspiring bodhicitta. Not only do I have the wish to attain Buddhahood but I vow never to give up my bodhicitta. Report an error in the passage at 23:37 Highlight the passage at 23:37

24:02 I may or may not be ready to take the bodhisattva vows yet. I may or may not be able to practice the six perfections yet. But I vow to never give up my bodhicitta. Report an error in the passage at 24:02 Highlight the passage at 24:02

24:14 That's what we were covering last time. Whether we knew it or not, that's what we were covering. Does that make sense? I mean, it's a little bit complicated because there are different levels, right? You have the aspiring bodhicitta without any vows. Then you have the aspiring bodhicitta with the vow never to give up your bodhicitta. And then you have engaging bodhicitta where you take the bodhisattva vows which are associated with the six perfections. Report an error in the passage at 24:14 Highlight the passage at 24:14

24:44 Okay, do I need to say that again? Okay, so you have aspiring bodhicitta without taking any vows. Report an error in the passage at 24:44 Highlight the passage at 24:44

24:56 And then we have aspiring bodhicitta with the vow never to give up my aspiring bodhicitta. Never give it up. Not only do I want to attain enlightenment for the welfare of all sentient beings, but I promise never to give up my bodhicitta. Report an error in the passage at 24:56 Highlight the passage at 24:56

25:17 I promise never to just settle for becoming an arhat and getting out of cyclic existence for just myself. I promise to always work for complete enlightenment because I want to help others. I don't want to just... Absorb in my own bliss. Report an error in the passage at 25:17 Highlight the passage at 25:17

25:39 So the ritual we went through last time was associated with that, that never giving up your bodhicitta. And then the third level is engaged bodhicitta, taking the bodhisattva vows, the 18 root vows and the 46 secondary vows, and practicing the six perfections. Report an error in the passage at 25:39 Highlight the passage at 25:39

26:08 Okay, is that clear? The numbers? Oh, the 18 root and the 46. Six secondary bodhisattva vows. That goes with engaged bodhicitta. So if we've ever taken a tantric initiation, we've taken bodhisattva vows. We've promised to engage in the six perfections. We have engaged bodhicitta. Report an error in the passage at 26:08 Highlight the passage at 26:08

26:40 Or if we've taken bodhisattva vows, we have engaged bodhicitta. Report an error in the passage at 26:40 Highlight the passage at 26:40

26:48 I didn't forget. Report an error in the passage at 26:48 Highlight the passage at 26:48

26:54 was just, where? Report an error in the passage at 26:54 Highlight the passage at 26:54

26:58 Where does Tonglen practice fit on that spectrum? Tonglen practice is a method for attaining aspiring bodhicitta. The sevenfold cause and effect, the exchanging self and others, the 11th step, they're all methods for attaining the aspiring bodhicitta. Report an error in the passage at 26:58 Highlight the passage at 26:58

27:24 All that's clear? All right. Okay, so then once we've taken this vow, so the second level I've been talking about, you have aspirational bodhicitta and then you go through this ritual to take the vow, I'm never going to give up my bodhicitta. I'm never going to settle for just liberation for just myself, right? Okay, so once you've taken that vow, then there are precepts that we try to follow, right? Report an error in the passage at 27:24 Highlight the passage at 27:24

27:51 Because it's not so easy. To keep your bodhicitta, right? We have our good days and we have our not so good days, right? We have our good periods where other people are nice to us and so we have, you know, so we have kindness in our hearts and we really want to help others. And then there are periods when it seems like... Report an error in the passage at 27:51 Highlight the passage at 27:51

28:13 People are getting on our case a lot or people are asking for too much or we don't feel well, you know, we feel sick and people are just tugging on us all the time and we, you know, and we might get fed up just like all these sentient beings, you know. Report an error in the passage at 28:13 Highlight the passage at 28:13

28:32 They're kind of, you know, they're kind of uncooperative, right? They're, you know, they're really, they're really... It's endless, right? They're always asking for more kind of thing, right? So it's easy to give that up, right? It's one thing to be inspired for a certain period of time when we're doing a lot of practice. Report an error in the passage at 28:32 Highlight the passage at 28:32

28:50 It's another thing when life isn't going so well and it's just really hard to keep that enthusiasm for bodhicitta, which is why we need to train in the precepts for aspirational bodhicitta. Because it's actually so easy. to give up Bodhicitta, right? Report an error in the passage at 28:50 Highlight the passage at 28:50

29:11 Anytime we're angry, it's degenerating our bodhicitta, right? Anytime, you know, anytime we, you know. When indifference and anger arise, it's going against the energy of bodhicitta. right so we need to we need to watch our minds we need to be careful right not to Report an error in the passage at 29:11 Highlight the passage at 29:11

29:37 know, not to fall into the angry mind and give it a lot of fuel, right? I mean, we'll get angry sometimes and annoyed at people, but we need to remember the downsides of anger so we don't justify it, right, and just keep feeding it, yeah? Otherwise, our bodhicitta is probably going to degenerate, yeah. Report an error in the passage at 29:37 Highlight the passage at 29:37

30:04 So the precepts for bodhicitta. Report an error in the passage at 30:04 Highlight the passage at 30:04

30:16 So this is divided into two main sections. So there are four causes that we train in to assure that our bodhicitta will not degenerate in this life. I don't know about assure, but to create the causes so that we don't lose our bodhicitta or it doesn't degenerate in this life. And then the other thing that's quite unique about bodhisattva vows and the vow of aspirational bodhicitta is we're taking that vow not just for the rest of this life. Report an error in the passage at 30:16 Highlight the passage at 30:16

30:50 We're taking that vow for all of our future lives until we attain enlightenment. So how can you do that? How can you make sure that you don't lose your bodhicitta in the future lives? Well, there's certain things that we can do to help. Report an error in the passage at 30:50 Highlight the passage at 30:50

31:08 Create conducive circumstances so that we don't lose our bodhicitta in future lives, right? Whereas all other vows that we take, we take just for this life, right? The lay vows, you know, no killing, no lying, no stealing, you know? We're promising to keep those for the rest of this life, right? But they don't apply to future lives. You know, monastic vows are like that tantric. I believe tantric vows are like that as well. But bodhicitta vows we're taking for basically forever. Report an error in the passage at 31:08 Highlight the passage at 31:08

31:37 So then that brings us to the second section where we train in causes to not be separated from bodhicitta in future lives as well. So the four causes to help our bodhicitta not degenerate in this life. The first one is training in remembering the advantages of bodhicitta. So that the strength of one's delight in bodhicitta increases. So with anything, if we think about the advantages again and again, we feel inspired to do it. Report an error in the passage at 31:37 Highlight the passage at 31:37

32:22 So what are the advantages of bodhicitta? So some of these advantages, you know, I look at and I think, you know, that doesn't inspire me at all, right? So what we do, so I'll give you the list, and then what we do is we contemplate the ones that are meaningful to us, right? Report an error in the passage at 32:22 Highlight the passage at 32:22

32:47 So first of all, Lama Tsongkhapa says, he quotes a sūtra saying, actually, Report an error in the passage at 32:47 Highlight the passage at 32:47

33:21 okay, this Gandavuha sūtra says, Bodhicitta is the seed of all Buddha's qualities and all the conduct and aspirational prayers of the Bodhisattva are summarized in it. So it is the seed of all Buddha's qualities. Bodhicitta is the seed of all Buddha's qualities. So it's the seed that gives rise to all the qualities of the Buddha. Report an error in the passage at 33:21 Highlight the passage at 33:21

33:49 Without bodhicitta we can never become a Buddha. It's the compassion and the love and the compassion of bodhicitta that gives rise to the Buddha later. So without bodhicitta, we'll never become a Buddha. Report an error in the passage at 33:49 Highlight the passage at 33:49

34:11 So Geshe Soppa says bodhicitta is like a seed that will grow into a huge tree whose every part is medicinal. So every part of a huge tree. The trunk, the branches, the leaves, the bark, everything is medicinal. And similarly with bodhicitta, every aspect of bodhicitta is medicinal. Every aspect of bodhicitta is helpful. And then secondly, bodhicitta is the condensation of all the Mahāyāna practices and prayers. Report an error in the passage at 34:11 Highlight the passage at 34:11

34:46 So as we've seen in this class, there's a lot of... There's a lot of Mahāyāna practices. There's a lot of things to meditate on. In the lamrim, you go through death and impermanence and precious human rebirth and suffering and the Four Noble Truths and all of that. All of that is included in the practice of developing bodhicitta. Because in order to develop bodhicitta, we need to have the love for others. Report an error in the passage at 34:46 Highlight the passage at 34:46

35:17 We need to have the compassion that understands that Beings are stuck in cyclic existence, that beings are going to die, that beings are controlled by karma and mental afflictions. So all of the entire path is encompassed in bodhicitta. Report an error in the passage at 35:17 Highlight the passage at 35:17

35:39 So it's the heart of all the bodhisattva practices for the benefit of sentient beings. Report an error in the passage at 35:39 Highlight the passage at 35:39

35:53 Sorry, we don't have the slides. Does anybody have their text? If you have their text, I'll give you the page number we're on. So at least you can follow along. Report an error in the passage at 35:53 Highlight the passage at 35:53

36:14 Uh-huh. Well, yeah, if you want to look on the phone, yeah, great. Report an error in the passage at 36:14 Highlight the passage at 36:14

36:29 Okay, so we're on page 156 Report an error in the passage at 36:29 Highlight the passage at 36:29

36:38 in the text of people. Report an error in the passage at 36:38 Highlight the passage at 36:38

36:46 Toward the middle. Report an error in the passage at 36:46 Highlight the passage at 36:46

36:50 Actually, so toward the bottom, where it says the actual advantages is next. So there are two... Actual advantages of bodhicitta, you become a holy field and you thoroughly hold the merit of non-harm. You become a holy field and you thoroughly hold the merit of non-harm. The first one, you become a holy field. Report an error in the passage at 36:50 Highlight the passage at 36:50

37:19 That has, I believe, four points. First of all, becoming a field of merit. so right so So we've heard the teachings on karma, you know, where the karma that we create becomes more powerful if we do it with respect to a holy field, right, with a Buddha or a bodhisattva. Yeah, like if we make an offering to a Buddha or bodhisattva, the merit that we create is much, much greater than if I make an offering, right, to an ordinary being because of the power of the field. Report an error in the passage at 37:19 Highlight the passage at 37:19

37:58 Similarly, if you get angry at a Buddha or Bodhisattva, it's much worse than if you get angry at just an ordinary being. Because they're an object that's focused on benefiting others. So let's say you get angry at a Bodhisattva and you say something to discourage others. Report an error in the passage at 37:58 Highlight the passage at 37:58

38:26 To believe in the bodhisattva, you know that's so detrimental for others, right? If you're trying to create a negative impression of a bodhisattva to somebody, right? Whereas it's much worse, right, as a result than just saying something negative about a normal being, right? So the field or the objects of Buddhas and bodhisattvas, right, are, you know, much more powerful merit-wise as well as negative karma-wise. Report an error in the passage at 38:26 Highlight the passage at 38:26

38:56 So one of the benefits of generating bodhicitta is that you become a holy object. So the people that you touch, if they do nice things for you, they create a lot of merit. So when I first heard this one, I thought, okay, so you become a holy field. That sounds very egotistical. I want to become a bodhisattva because... Report an error in the passage at 38:56 Highlight the passage at 38:56

39:23 I become a holy field, right? But it's not about me, right? You're trying to benefit others, right? So then by coming into contact with others, then others can create more merit, right? So you can be more beneficial to others is what I understand to be the essence of that advantage. Report an error in the passage at 39:23 Highlight the passage at 39:23

39:47 Okay. Report an error in the passage at 39:47 Highlight the passage at 39:47

39:52 Is there any difference if you know that it is a bodhicitta? That's the scary part. Is there more merit if you don't know it's a bodhisattva and you make an offering for a homeless? No, I'm not sure. I haven't heard or read anything on that. If you know they're a bodhisattva or if you don't know they're a bodhisattva and you make those two different people, if they make the same offerings with the same kind of mind, I don't know. Report an error in the passage at 39:52 Highlight the passage at 39:52

40:32 I mean, I would, no, I don't want to speculate. Report an error in the passage at 40:32 Highlight the passage at 40:32

40:38 Yeah, I mean, that's the point, that our practice is, we don't know who are bodhisattvas, right? So we need to make, you know, we need to be kind to everybody and try not to get angry at anybody. Report an error in the passage at 40:38 Highlight the passage at 40:38

40:54 But these questions about, you know, what creates more merit and what creates, you know, better karma, it's hard to say, you know, because it's like... For the bodhisattva vows, some of the vows, if you don't know, then you're not necessarily breaking it. But if you know and you still do it, in that sense, there's a difference of knowing and not knowing. So I'm wondering if that would follow on that case as well. Report an error in the passage at 40:54 Highlight the passage at 40:54

41:23 Yeah, so with the bodhisattva vows, right? Actually, ignorance is not an excuse. So even if you don't know the vow, you're breaking it if you break it. But I think I've heard it said that it's not as bad as if you know you're breaking the vow and you do it anyway. But still you're breaking the vow either way. So it might be similar, like you're saying, if you know they're a bodhisattva or if you don't. Report an error in the passage at 41:23 Highlight the passage at 41:23

41:53 But I haven't seen anything specific about that. And then Rose. Report an error in the passage at 41:53 Highlight the passage at 41:53

42:04 I've heard once that you can break the vows or you can stain the vows. Yeah. Yeah, and we'll talk about that later. Yeah, you can stain the vow or degenerate the vow or damage the vow, weaken the vow, or you can break it completely. There are two different levels. Yeah. Report an error in the passage at 42:04 Highlight the passage at 42:04

42:27 All right. So second point on you become a holy field is that you become an exalted being. So here they're just talking about how when you become a bodhisattva, you're... Report an error in the passage at 42:27 Highlight the passage at 42:27

42:48 You're worthy of more veneration or more respect than someone who's an arhat. Someone who's, even though they've abandoned their mental afflictions, they're still not working for the benefit of others. So I'm not sure how much that benefit will move you. Okay, the third point underneath becoming a holy field is you become a field of merit. Report an error in the passage at 42:48 Highlight the passage at 42:48

43:13 So even if you create like... Even the little things that you do, positive actions, like giving a dollar to a homeless person, creates a huge amount of merit, like once you have bodhicitta. If we ordinary beings give a dollar to a homeless person, it's meritorious. But if a bodhisattva does it, then the merit they create is immeasurably larger, because they're doing it for the benefit of all sentient beings. Report an error in the passage at 43:13 Highlight the passage at 43:13

43:48 it becomes right much So your progress on the path becomes much quicker, right? That's why you can become a Buddha because you create merit all the time, you know, huge amounts of merit. Report an error in the passage at 43:48 Highlight the passage at 43:48

44:05 And then fourth is under becoming a holy field is you become a support for the whole world. You're like the earth. Report an error in the passage at 44:05 Highlight the passage at 44:05

44:20 So Gishi Jampa Gyatso in relation to this says, It says, just as all vegetation grows from the earth, similarly, all the good qualities of the bodhisattvas and Buddhas grow from bodhicitta. So bodhicitta is like the earth. Plants grow from the earth. So all the good qualities of the path in Buddhahood grow from bodhicitta is the point there. Report an error in the passage at 44:20 Highlight the passage at 44:20

44:53 Then the second main benefit. A bodhicitta being talked about here is holding the merit of non-harm. The first one was becoming a holy field. The second one is holding the merit of non-harm. Report an error in the passage at 44:53 Highlight the passage at 44:53

45:09 So they say, Lama Tsongkhapa says that you're guarded by protectors, like these Dharma protectors around. So when we have a bodhicitta, others won't be able to harm you, like lions and wild elephants. Report an error in the passage at 45:09 Highlight the passage at 45:09

45:28 Spirits, if we believe in spirits, aren't able to harm you because we have all of this wonderful loving energy toward others. So there's this old story of Buddha Shaky Muni when he was, I think people were afraid of being attacked by a wild elephant, but through the force of his love and compassion and bodhicitta, the wild elephant didn't attack him, couldn't harm him. Report an error in the passage at 45:28 Highlight the passage at 45:28

46:01 So if we're afraid of being harmed, then bodhicitta is the best protection. Report an error in the passage at 46:01 Highlight the passage at 46:01

46:10 Are these benefits that happen once we become fully enlightened or are these things that are occurring on the way? These are benefits of developing bodhicitta. So having this aspirational bodhicitta, this sincere wish to achieve enlightenment for the welfare of all sentient beings. Then these benefits occur. So we contemplate these benefits, right? Because we don't want to degenerate our bodhicitta, right? Report an error in the passage at 46:10 Highlight the passage at 46:10

46:45 We don't want to lose our bodhicitta, so we remember again and again, oh yeah, all of the good things about bodhicitta, so I don't let it go, right? Oh yeah, I won't be harmed, I'll be able to benefit others more by being a holy field, etc. Report an error in the passage at 46:45 Highlight the passage at 46:45

47:03 The second point underneath... Thoroughly holding the merit of non-harm is that mantras and the like will succeed more easily. So there's these cities, these powers that bodhisattvas develop on the path in order to help others. Report an error in the passage at 47:03 Highlight the passage at 47:03

47:26 And once we have bodhicitta, it becomes much easier to develop these powers. So especially in tantra, they talk about these. Report an error in the passage at 47:26 Highlight the passage at 47:26

47:37 These four what they call common cities or common attainments, pacification, control, wrath and increase. Report an error in the passage at 47:37 Highlight the passage at 47:37

47:53 So pacification, so when we have the power of pacification, it said that we can pacify like illness, we can pacify harms of others, things like that. We can pacify epidemics. Contagious diseases. We can also attain the city of increase, like to extend our lifespan, to increase wealth. Not so much for me, but for the benefit of others, etc. So once we become bodhisattvas, these attainments. Report an error in the passage at 47:53 Highlight the passage at 47:53

48:45 come much more easily, okay? I'm sorry, what was the fourth one? You said pacification, wrath, increase and power. Report an error in the passage at 48:45 Highlight the passage at 48:45

49:04 So the next benefit is famines and the like will not occur. Lama Tsongkhapa says fear, famine and harm from non-human beings will not occur in those places in which they have not occurred. Report an error in the passage at 49:04 Highlight the passage at 49:04

49:19 So in places where bodhisattvas live? It's much less likely to have famine and war and these kinds of things. So if we think about where famines and wars and things occur, it's likely there aren't many bodhisattvas there, according to this teaching. Report an error in the passage at 49:19 Highlight the passage at 49:19

49:43 So that's kind of nice. Report an error in the passage at 49:43 Highlight the passage at 49:43

49:49 And then after you die, Report an error in the passage at 49:49 Highlight the passage at 49:49

49:57 after you die in our next life, we'll encounter little harm. So we'll probably have strong bodies, we won't have much illness, etc. So in this life, a lot of the lamrim is contemplating future lives, trying to create positive conditions in our future lives, making sure we don't encounter difficult, especially obstacles to practice in our future lives. Report an error in the passage at 49:57 Highlight the passage at 49:57

50:26 So if we develop bodhicitta, we're creating powerful conditions to have a really good life, the next life, and to be able to continue to practice. Report an error in the passage at 50:26 Highlight the passage at 50:26

50:40 The next one is, one is without anger and patient. So if we have bodhicitta, we have less anger. Lama Tsongkhapa says, due to being endowed with patience and a gentle disposition, you will bear harm that is done to you and will not return the harm and so forth. Report an error in the passage at 50:40 Highlight the passage at 50:40

51:02 So we'll be more gentle, patient people. Report an error in the passage at 51:02 Highlight the passage at 51:02

51:10 I want to go back actually to... Just talk a little bit about making sure that our next life has good conditions. I think that I'm becoming more and more aware of how important it is to have good conditions in order to practice. If we're in an environment where everybody around us is angry or has Report an error in the passage at 51:10 Highlight the passage at 51:10

51:44 wrong views, that really affects our minds. I mean, it's hard enough to develop bodhicitta, you know, when we have Sechenling and we have all these other Dharma practitioners around, when other people are, you know, helping us and, you know, nobody's being really, really horrible to us. But then imagine if we were in prison, you know, and people are trying to kill you all the time or rape you. How hard would it be to practice there, you know? Report an error in the passage at 51:44 Highlight the passage at 51:44

52:15 I like to think that I'd be able to practice in any environment, but I know that that's not true. We need conducive conditions in order to continue our progress on the path. Report an error in the passage at 52:15 Highlight the passage at 52:15

52:31 Or if in our next life we have horrible parents, it makes it really hard to find the Dharma. It makes it really hard to develop the trust in other sentient beings in order to continue our bodhicitta practice. Report an error in the passage at 52:31 Highlight the passage at 52:31

52:53 So it's an incredible thing that we've met the bodhicitta teachings in this life and we have the opportunity to cultivate it in this life. And then the more we're able to cultivate it, then the more likely we'll be able to continue. Report an error in the passage at 52:53 Highlight the passage at 52:53

53:11 In the same vein in future lives. And then the more we cultivate bodhicitta, I mean, I notice that the people around me are much nicer than they were before, you know, before I was on the path. You know, you're clearing out your karma, right? And so over time, you know, people, the people around you are, I mean, I shouldn't say just people, the beings around you are nicer and nicer and more and more helpful. Report an error in the passage at 53:11 Highlight the passage at 53:11

53:40 Do you notice that? Report an error in the passage at 53:40 Highlight the passage at 53:40

53:47 So it's an incredible thing. Every moment that we meditate on bodhicitta or just try to develop bodhicitta, like we're contributing to the peace in the world and we're creating the causes for more peace within ourselves and others. Report an error in the passage at 53:47 Highlight the passage at 53:47

54:07 So it's really an incredible gift. Report an error in the passage at 54:07 Highlight the passage at 54:07

54:24 I'm not sure if I could affirm that. That people are nicer, but definitely the mindset is different. And maybe I don't take it as much personally anymore like before. So the same things could still be happening, but it's just my reaction to it is definitely different. Yeah, exactly. And then I think over time too, as we're... Report an error in the passage at 54:24 Highlight the passage at 54:24

54:56 Purifying our karma, right? Because we're purifying karma as we develop bodhicitta. We're accumulating merit and we're purifying karma. So our external circumstances seem to get better and better. Report an error in the passage at 54:56 Highlight the passage at 54:56

55:12 I mean, I tell this story sometimes to people, but when I was growing up, I have a brother who was... Constantly on my case, constantly criticizing me. You know, I was a horrible person, you know, and I just felt really oppressed growing up and constantly oppressed and fearful. And now he's still like that with some people, but he's so nice to me. Report an error in the passage at 55:12 Highlight the passage at 55:12

55:48 Now, you know, it's just, I mean, there's something that shifted. there you know even though it's not like he's essentially to him he's a good hearted person but he has a a grumpy person right so Report an error in the passage at 55:48 Highlight the passage at 55:48

56:14 There's something to our practice. We all know people who are really nice that you wouldn't even consider. consider, like, harming. The sweet little old lady, like you would never, like you wouldn't even consider yelling at her or something like that, right? Where, you know, you might yell it, but, you know, you'd be much more likely to say something negative to, you know, the jerk at work than the kind person who never does anything and says anything mean to anyone, right? Report an error in the passage at 56:14 Highlight the passage at 56:14

56:52 So there's some protection, right, that your, you know, your good heart gives, right? Like my old housemate that Leslie knows, Judith, you know, some of you know Judith, you know? Like who would ever say anything nasty to her, you know? I mean, it seems inconceivable that you would ever say anything. Well, yeah, some of you know her. You know, you can't even imagine saying something mean to her, you know? Report an error in the passage at 56:52 Highlight the passage at 56:52

57:19 It would just, you would just feel terrible, right? Right, right. Yeah, you know? And, you know, she's just the sweetest, you know, just such a good-hearted person. So there's a protection, you know, from being like that. And Report an error in the passage at 57:19 Highlight the passage at 57:19

57:42 add to the brother story. I hope my brother never listens to this class. Report an error in the passage at 57:42 Highlight the passage at 57:42

57:51 I've always been distant from my brother. We have a big age span, and I'm always wanting to open up, and I'm a touchy-feely that's digging into our problems, a member of the family. don't Report an error in the passage at 57:51 Highlight the passage at 57:51

58:00 We don't do that. But he called me out of the blue today in tears. I love you so much. And it was just like, that's my brother. And people, it's such a different experience with people. Lots of heart. And I think having his heart open to me makes my heart more open to everybody else. So that love is just like, woo-wee. Yeah, yeah, that's great. Report an error in the passage at 58:00 Highlight the passage at 58:00

58:27 great. Report an error in the passage at 58:27 Highlight the passage at 58:27

58:34 And it all makes sense, right, when we really get karma. Well, I don't know, you know, really getting karma is kind of difficult, but, you know, the more we understand karma and see it operating in our lives, it makes sense, right? When we clear out that negative karma. You know, people are nasty to us because of negative actions we've created in the past, right? So if we clear out that karma, then, you know, eventually everybody will be, you know, will be a... Report an error in the passage at 58:34 Highlight the passage at 58:34

59:03 A deity to us, you know, when we become enlightened, everyone will be pure, everyone will be a deity because you purified all that. Okay, so it helps to understand emptiness too. Report an error in the passage at 59:03 Highlight the passage at 59:03

59:18 Beings aren't nasty from their own side, right? However much we think that they are, they're not. And our perceptions are due to our karma. Report an error in the passage at 59:18 Highlight the passage at 59:18

59:35 And then... And then lastly, it will be difficult for one to be reborn in the bad migrations and one will quickly be freed. So if we have bodhicitta, very difficult to take a bad rebirth in the next life. Report an error in the passage at 59:35 Highlight the passage at 59:35

59:51 So that's a nice benefit, you know. Okay, I won't be reborn in hell or hungry ghosts or, you know, next life if I have bodhicitta. Or if you have created the cause to be reborn in the bad migrations. Report an error in the passage at 59:51 Highlight the passage at 59:51

1:00:08 They say that you'll be reborn there and only live there very quickly and just bounce right back up. Like the story of Shakyamuni Buddha who killed the sailor who was going to kill the 500 men. It said that he created the negative karma to be reborn in the hell realms but he bounced immediately back and didn't suffer. Report an error in the passage at 1:00:08 Highlight the passage at 1:00:08

1:00:31 He didn't suffer in the hell realms. So if you're bodhisattva and you're reborn in the lower elms, it's very quick and you're not going to suffer. Sometimes I think that, oh gosh, I hope I'm not going to have a terrible life, next life, right? You know, if we practice bodhicitta, probably not. Report an error in the passage at 1:00:31 Highlight the passage at 1:00:31

1:01:03 I just had a comment about that. There's the story of the monk who prayed fervently to be reborn in the hells, really wanted to be so he could help people in hell. And then when he died... He ended up in a pure land and he was totally disappointed because he had prayed so hard for this. But his merit was so high that there was no way he was going to be reborn in hell, even though he wanted to be. Report an error in the passage at 1:01:03 Highlight the passage at 1:01:03

1:01:25 Yeah, that's a great story. Yeah, the more you pray to be... Yeah, exactly. Because he wanted so badly to be reborn in the lower realm so that he can help those beings, right? So it was impossible. He couldn't create the karma to be born there. Yeah, yeah. So even if you want to, you can't. Okay. Report an error in the passage at 1:01:25 Highlight the passage at 1:01:25

1:02:02 Yeah, see that's, yeah, so there's no, like, right, there's, in this tradition, right, there's no God, you know, that's judging you, right? It's just cause and effect. It's just the karma that ripens, right? It's the karma that you've created and the karma that ripens based on a number of different, right, factors, based on your mind at the time of death and, you know, the karma that's been heaviest in your life. Report an error in the passage at 1:02:02 Highlight the passage at 1:02:02

1:02:28 you know, throughout your life and things like that. So if you're really virtuous in that life and your mind was good at the time of death, sorry, you're going to have a good rebirth. Report an error in the passage at 1:02:28 Highlight the passage at 1:02:28

1:02:51 And then Lama Tsongkhapa gets into this, the merit. So the merit of having bodhicitta, merit doesn't have form, it doesn't have material subject. What do you have on here? Report an error in the passage at 1:02:51 Highlight the passage at 1:02:51

1:03:02 But if it did, he says, it could not be contained in space itself. It's that vast. It couldn't be contained in space. That's how much merit we're creating with bodhicitta. So it's a huge difference, right, if you do something nice for somebody with bodhicitta and without bodhicitta. You can do the same kinds of things in your life. Report an error in the passage at 1:03:02 Highlight the passage at 1:03:02

1:03:32 With bodhicitta and create incredible amounts of merit and causes for enlightenment. Or you can do the same things without bodhicitta and then create a room full of merit. Report an error in the passage at 1:03:32 Highlight the passage at 1:03:32

1:03:49 So bodhicitta, it's like we were saying last week, just bodhicitta practice. Every moment we spend doing bodhicitta practice is a moment well spent. Report an error in the passage at 1:03:49 Highlight the passage at 1:03:49

1:04:03 Even if our heart isn't opening, even if there's a lot of resistance in the mind, but just trying is a moment incredibly well spent. Just planting those seeds, the drops in the bucket. Want to take a break? Then we'll see if we can get the slides to work. Report an error in the passage at 1:04:03 Highlight the passage at 1:04:03

1:04:35 Okay, Report an error in the passage at 1:04:35 Highlight the passage at 1:04:35

1:04:39 Peter. don't get to use our telepathic power. Report an error in the passage at 1:04:39 Highlight the passage at 1:04:39

1:04:39 Peter. Report an error in the passage at 1:04:39 Highlight the passage at 1:04:39

1:04:50 Oh, it is? Oh, I didn't even check that. Well, that'll probably make a difference. I do that all the time, I'll either plug something in the wrong place or actually I usually forget to turn it on in the first place. I always get my glasses on my face and I'm always running around the house looking for them. Report an error in the passage at 1:04:50 Highlight the passage at 1:04:50

1:05:13 Where are they? Where are your keys? Where are they? Where are my keys? Report an error in the passage at 1:05:13 Highlight the passage at 1:05:13

1:05:33 again. Did you just turn it off? I just turned it off and turned it back on. Yeah, so after you turn it off, they say you need to keep it off for a few minutes before turning it back on again. So, yeah, there's something to do with that. So we'll get off for a couple of minutes. Thank you. Report an error in the passage at 1:05:33 Highlight the passage at 1:05:33

1:06:00 Hi, sorry, I know it's your break time, but, um, so, I know that in this tradition, there's a 16 ARHOTs, and if they didn't have a lot of teeth, I think, if they were ARHOTs, then why are we doing that? Report an error in the passage at 1:06:00 Highlight the passage at 1:06:00

1:06:16 I've never got that. I've never done it. the good, but I've seen the, like, in urban corruptions house, you know, they have the system, well, but, Report an error in the passage at 1:06:16 Highlight the passage at 1:06:16

1:06:28 Yeah, I've always kind of wondered about that. What's so great? Yeah, Report an error in the passage at 1:06:28 Highlight the passage at 1:06:28

1:06:38 here we have. My understanding of these... and why they're done and all that is very, very slim. Report an error in the passage at 1:06:38 Highlight the passage at 1:06:38

1:06:52 I'm a little, a little bit of a low level. A lot of the spiritual stuff, it has a lot of, you know. Tizzy begins, it takes a little bit of culture. Busy at work, busy, busy, busy. But yeah, yeah. I had another question, but I can't remember. 18 and old. But it's getting there. It's getting there. How's your body doing this? Report an error in the passage at 1:06:52 Highlight the passage at 1:06:52

1:07:14 Slowly but surely, if I find anything out, I'll let you know. something very special about those. I think it's the springing. There were a bunch of our lives back then. Sure. Report an error in the passage at 1:07:14 Highlight the passage at 1:07:14

1:07:28 I love it, but I actually love it, you know, like my daughters, and her friends came out and they just spontaneously went to the backyard, you know, and it's just, that was really nice, you know, we don't do a lot of celebration, and then they, I made her go to the backyard, but she always get out there for five minutes, and still they went home. Report an error in the passage at 1:07:28 Highlight the passage at 1:07:28

1:08:12 Thank you. I know that it's a form of self-sharing in an inverted, perverted way. Well, first of all, don't let that thought, right? Like when the thought comes up, we believe it and then we keep feeding it, right? So I've done that a lot. Report an error in the passage at 1:08:12 Highlight the passage at 1:08:12

1:08:44 So two things would help. My Lama suggested that I meditate on emptiness. It's not easy, but it's helpful. Who is this being that's worthless? Report an error in the passage at 1:08:44 Highlight the passage at 1:08:44

1:09:23 Thank you. Yeah, do it on yourself. I mean, if we do it only on ourself or not on ourself, maybe you can do it. Yeah, I know. And if you have a little kind of work with yourself, you can do it on your own side, one side, one side. Report an error in the passage at 1:09:23 Highlight the passage at 1:09:23

1:09:40 Yeah. Yeah. Don't, you know, don't do it on your own side. Don't do it on your own side. Don't do it on your own side. Thank you. We are here. Report an error in the passage at 1:09:40 Highlight the passage at 1:09:40

· · · silence, 1 minute

1:10:35 Thank you. Report an error in the passage at 1:10:35 Highlight the passage at 1:10:35

1:10:40 You can get it, but I don't think they're printing it right now. That's what somebody told me. There's this new website called sproutlaunch.com or.org or something. I found it through a Facebook ad. And they encourage people to do like random acts of kindness. And if you go to their website and you tell them your random acts of kindness that you did for the day, you get entered into a prize. Report an error in the passage at 1:10:40 Highlight the passage at 1:10:40

1:11:08 And I won. A $5 amazon.com gift certificate. So I was thinking, because I was just thinking about Amazon and this book, and maybe it's used for $5. Yeah, you'll easily be able to find it. I want to show you my one name. I don't know. Molly is the founder of it. Report an error in the passage at 1:11:08 Highlight the passage at 1:11:08

1:11:40 You could do it with any of them. Well, I just gave you a red one. Just do it with a green. It doesn't matter, just do it. I think that red is that. You could do this all day long every time you feel the stuff. So you start with your shoulder. Report an error in the passage at 1:11:40 Highlight the passage at 1:11:40

1:12:05 Actually, do your left first. OK, good. Let's start with his Report an error in the passage at 1:12:05 Highlight the passage at 1:12:05

1:12:10 Down, two fingers, turn your hand over, back up, the back of the shoulder, 21 times. Report an error in the passage at 1:12:10 Highlight the passage at 1:12:10

1:12:21 You will be able to feel the difference. The 21 is like the pattern thing. And this is, it really makes a bunch of difference. There's a couple other things I'll show you. Report an error in the passage at 1:12:21 Highlight the passage at 1:12:21

1:12:36 They're quick to, but this should be able, like, whenever you start feeling it, you should be able to split this out. I was just like, my elbow was killing me, and I did it, and I was like, because I haven't done it all day, I've been so busy seeing people that have no, and my doctor's like, Vanessa, think you're right. Report an error in the passage at 1:12:36 Highlight the passage at 1:12:36

1:12:55 I'm like, well, you're wrong. I feel like I'm an additional. Should we try removing it? Anyway, just do that, so you do it 21 times. Report an error in the passage at 1:12:55 Highlight the passage at 1:12:55

1:13:05 I think you should look at that difference. And you can do it with any of them, but I think, you know, do red and then maybe try the others and you should go and feel... With my magical wood? That's your magical wood. It's a high, apparently that one, they didn't, this one's not known until, you know, like when I was involved with them. Report an error in the passage at 1:13:05 Highlight the passage at 1:13:05

1:13:25 It's a high frequency. There's like, they have families. The Torrents, they're all by themselves, but yours, it's a family with that one, a couple of solid. And the one that she really wanted was, they have a darker center. You might have seen a picture of them. It's a family of three different. Report an error in the passage at 1:13:25 Highlight the passage at 1:13:25

1:13:48 Like that's a little family, you know, that's a little group, a little group, and the other one is their family. This is the highest frequency of that family, which is why. Report an error in the passage at 1:13:48 Highlight the passage at 1:13:48

1:14:07 So it's the highest frequency, and the highest frequency is metal anyway, so. Which is why I've noticed... Report an error in the passage at 1:14:07 Highlight the passage at 1:14:07

1:14:12 you know, and I would say thank you. When I used the blue one like this, I could feel a difference, like my head clearing. We'll have to get you up on your pendulum skills. When you hold it, those three fingers up. hearing. It's not a thing. There's a. Report an error in the passage at 1:14:12 Highlight the passage at 1:14:12

1:14:33 Instead of like, I've been doing it like this, like that, and what you do is... You do it over your knee because your knee should be counterclockwise. If you look at that, I gave you a little thing. Report an error in the passage at 1:14:33 Highlight the passage at 1:14:33

1:14:53 Counterclockwise. So you go across your body. You probably get to your heart and it will go the other way. So you just hold it. Report an error in the passage at 1:14:53 Highlight the passage at 1:14:53

1:15:03 You just like slow down every time that it's trying to go the other way. just practical. And then she can just perform that. Report an error in the passage at 1:15:03 Highlight the passage at 1:15:03

1:15:08 and then you just go down your leg, then your leg, and then I guess you're going to do it. Those two things, all you want. Much less, I'll have to tell you what she, I had the wildest things she was doing around me. My phone rang, my phone never rang, it was vibrating, so I was alert. I was laying there and I was doing Medicine Buddha mantra. And so I was very alert because the phone had been ringing and I was laying there and I was hurting and I'm like, okay, but I'm just going to go as long as I can. Report an error in the passage at 1:15:08 Highlight the passage at 1:15:08

1:15:45 And then I felt this, like I'm laying flat, right? And I felt this huge rush of movement, like... It's like my head went that way. That was like the energy shift. Report an error in the passage at 1:15:45 Highlight the passage at 1:15:45