Sunday Morning Service (10 August 2008)

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0:41 Morning everybody. Report an error in the passage at 0:41 Highlight the passage at 0:41

0:48 So what I've heard that we do usually in these Sunday mornings is have quite a lot of prayers and practices and then Geshe-Dakpa comes down to give a little Dharma talk. But today we're going to do things a little bit differently. What I thought I would do is give a talk and then open things up for questions. Report an error in the passage at 0:48 Highlight the passage at 0:48

1:11 Often students have questions on different... Classes they've been to, readings that they've done and things like that and there's never really an opportunity to... Ask kind of random questions from all directions to someone. We were doing this practice in Santa Cruz at Land of Medicine Buddha that we called Open Mic Dharma Slam and people would come and bring all kinds of questions that they'd always wanted to know about something. Report an error in the passage at 1:11 Highlight the passage at 1:11

1:40 Of course they had a little bit of preparation because we announced it on the website but hopefully you'll... Be able to come up with some things. So after giving a little talk on integrating Dharma into daily life, we'll open it up for questions. Okay, but first what we'll do is sit for a while, watching our breath and then set our motivation and take refuge and generate bodhicitta as sort of a small guided meditation. Report an error in the passage at 1:40 Highlight the passage at 1:40

2:07 So first of all, just sit straight, your back straight in your meditation posture. Head tilted slightly forward, tongue on the roof of your mouth, behind your teeth. In our tradition, we open our eyes slightly, have them aiming at a spot on the floor just a few feet in front of us. Report an error in the passage at 2:07 Highlight the passage at 2:07

2:31 And then to settle and focus your mind, just turn your attention to your breath. Either the sensation of the air coming in and out of your nostrils, or farther down in your body, your chest rising and falling. Report an error in the passage at 2:31 Highlight the passage at 2:31

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4:10 And then take a minute to set your motivation, just thinking about your motivation for coming to this class this morning. I think we're all looking for answers, ways to reduce our suffering, ways to make our lives more meaningful. Maybe you're a new student and you just realize that normal samsaric pursuits, trying to find happiness externally, just doesn't work. Report an error in the passage at 4:10 Highlight the passage at 4:10

4:42 Maybe you've tried and tried. You're finally just fed up. You're looking for a different way to find happiness. Report an error in the passage at 4:42 Highlight the passage at 4:42

4:53 It may be that you've studied a bit and understand a little bit about the way we create suffering for ourselves through karma and delusions. Report an error in the passage at 4:53 Highlight the passage at 4:53

5:08 And you're looking for ways to liberate yourself from that suffering. Looking for techniques to work with your mind, work with your karma to become liberated. Report an error in the passage at 5:08 Highlight the passage at 5:08

5:27 It may be that you have some understanding of the highest level of aspiration according to the Mahāyāna, which is to attain not just personal liberation, but full enlightenment, a completely different quality of enlightenment with full capacity to benefit beings, especially the mental qualities, omniscient mind, the ability to see beings, past and future lives, their karma. Report an error in the passage at 5:27 Highlight the passage at 5:27

6:01 For some of us it seems impossible, but at least we have some sort of admiration, some sort of aspiration towards this noble intention. So just take a minute to reflect on whatever level of motivation has drawn you to this class this morning. Set your intention for the next hour and a half that we have together. Report an error in the passage at 6:01 Highlight the passage at 6:01

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7:01 And then at the beginning of Dharma teachings we also take refuge and generate bodhicitta. motivation So taking refuge is not just praying to some being like the Buddha to save you from your suffering. It's not a theistic practice of just saying, oh please Lord Buddha save me from suffering. Because the real refuge is the Dharma. Report an error in the passage at 7:01 Highlight the passage at 7:01

7:28 The real refuge is, the real protection from suffering is the cessations. Generated by the realizations, the cessation of lower rebirths, of any kind of rebirth in saṃsāra. Report an error in the passage at 7:28 Highlight the passage at 7:28

7:47 And those cessations are attained through practicing the path. So the real refuge is the path and the realizations that lead to those cessations. So it's something we have to do on our own. We have to take responsibility for our own practice. We're not just praying for some external being. To help us. So the real refuge is in the Dharma, the practices and the cessations. Report an error in the passage at 7:47 Highlight the passage at 7:47

8:18 And then in the Buddha who taught the path and the Saṅgha. The real Saṅgha are Arya beings, beings who've had the direct realization of emptiness that are qualified to guide us and be our companions on the path. So let's just reflect on this, especially the real meaning of refuge. Turning away from the ways that we always try to find happiness and trying it a different way. Trying to find happiness internally through ceasing our karma and our delusions and gaining the realizations of the past. Report an error in the passage at 8:18 Highlight the passage at 8:18

9:01 That's the real refuge. Report an error in the passage at 9:01 Highlight the passage at 9:01

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9:47 So what I thought I would talk about today, we're often asked to give teachings on integrating Dharma into daily life. You know, how, what do I do? Busy city? City dwellers who don't have a whole lot of time to sit on their cushions, right? And so a lot of times people who just start to get interested in Buddhist practice who start to get interested in Buddhist practice and then they get a little bit frustrated because there's just not much time, is there? Report an error in the passage at 9:47 Highlight the passage at 9:47

10:23 You know, in busy daily life. They think, oh, you know, I feel so peaceful about half an hour that I get in the morning sitting on my cushion and then I get up from my cushion and it gets really chaotic and it's frustrating because I would like that peace that I get from sitting on the cushion. Instead of talking about integrating Dharma into daily life, I like to talk about integrating daily life into Dharma, because I think it's kind of more the other way around. Report an error in the passage at 10:23 Highlight the passage at 10:23

10:50 The whole point of meditation practice is to change your relationship with your reality. It's not about sitting on the cushion and just feeling some momentary feeling of peace. And then you get up and that peace is gone and you go out into chaotic reality and lose that peace. It's not like that at all. The point of Buddhism and what will liberate us from our suffering is completely changing our perspective on reality. Report an error in the passage at 10:50 Highlight the passage at 10:50

11:20 Completely changing our perspective. We had a day-long class yesterday that some of you attended on emptiness. The correct view of the ultimate nature of reality. And we talked a lot about how you can use that view to change. The way you relate to reality, especially to cut through your delusions and your karma. There are four distortions that are explained in Buddhism as the source of our suffering. Report an error in the passage at 11:20 Highlight the passage at 11:20

11:49 Four misperceptions of reality, distorted ways of looking at reality. One is seeing things that are by nature impermanent as permanent. This causes a lot of suffering for us, doesn't it? Something feels good and you grab onto its ankles and wish that it would last forever and it just doesn't, does it? Report an error in the passage at 11:49 Highlight the passage at 11:49

12:10 Because that's not the nature of reality. And Lord Buddha really emphasized teachings on impermanence, just to say, look you guys, this is a cause of suffering for you. I'm emphasizing that things are impermanent, not to be a big drag and not to bum you out, but to save you from suffering. Report an error in the passage at 12:10 Highlight the passage at 12:10

12:30 Realize that this is the nature of reality. You're going to suffer less. Just realize things arise due to causes and conditions. They cease because the karma for them to arise wore out. Just get used to it and then you'll suffer less. So clinging on to things that are impermanent by nature is permanent, is one of the ways that we cause suffering for ourselves. Report an error in the passage at 12:30 Highlight the passage at 12:30

12:54 Thinking that things that are impure by nature are pure. Especially in terms of happiness. Thinking that something is really going to give you happiness when it's not. And then the third one is things that are in the nature of suffering are really in the nature of happiness. And we talk in the Lamrim about the three levels of suffering. The suffering of suffering, which is what we usually think of when we think of suffering. Report an error in the passage at 12:54 Highlight the passage at 12:54

13:21 Car accidents, heart attacks, bitter divorces. That level of suffering. And then there's two other levels. And one is called the suffering of change. And that's just the fact that whatever you think gives you happiness is really just relieving some grosser sense of suffering. You know, we had, Ty and I were talking about the hamburgers yesterday. You know, are hamburgers really the source of happiness? Ty said, hamburgers, girlfriends and music. Sorry, I'm revealing your, the source of happiness, right? Report an error in the passage at 13:21 Highlight the passage at 13:21

13:54 You know, you eat one hamburger because you're hungry, right? You have a grosser level of suffering, which is extreme hunger, so you eat a burger. Maybe you eat two. What happens by the time you've eaten ten? That thing that looked like the source of happiness has become a source of suffering in itself, isn't it? Report an error in the passage at 13:54 Highlight the passage at 13:54

14:15 So then what happens? You quit eating. Then you quit eating for a couple of hours. Okay. Quit eating six, seven, eight, nine hours. What's happened? Then that thing that was the source of happiness turns into suffering and you're hungry again. So you eat more burgers and then it tilts back. And it's like this. It's like this teeter-totter thing. So we mistakenly think that the things that give us happiness, oh yes, you know, a good burger is a sort, for me it's tofu burgers and chocolate, you know, and other things. Report an error in the passage at 14:15 Highlight the passage at 14:15

14:46 The thing that is going to give us happiness is somehow a source of happiness where it's just a temporary relief from suffering and indulged in too much is going to turn into suffering in and of itself. So we mistakenly think that these things are the source of happiness. That's what Lord Buddha said. And then the fourth distortion is thinking that things that have no essence, have no inherent existence, have some essence. Report an error in the passage at 14:46 Highlight the passage at 14:46

15:15 So Lord Buddha said in order to suffer less we need to have realizations to alter these four distorted ways of looking at reality and see reality truly. So meditation practice is just practicing on your cushion so that in daily life you've altered those four distortions. That's the only point of meditation practice. Report an error in the passage at 15:15 Highlight the passage at 15:15

15:41 The word in Tibetan for meditation is closely related to the word that means habituation. And this is a big hint. We're habituating ourselves on our cushions for a certain way of perceiving reality. Then you get up, which is the main point. Then you go about your business. And because of the habituation that you've engaged in on your cushion, you relate to things differently. Report an error in the passage at 15:41 Highlight the passage at 15:41

16:09 You create less karma. Your mind is filled with less delusion and therefore you suffer less. So the whole point of meditation is daily life, which is why I like to reverse it. Instead of saying integrating Dharma into daily life like it's something separate. The whole point of Dharma practice and the whole point of meditation is to change the way you perceive reality in daily life. You know, the only reason these hermits go off for years, I mean, I did this myself, went off for years into a long meditation retreat, was not to experience the subjective feeling of bliss of all, you know, like, because it wasn't, basically, you know, because here I was in solitary confinement with my mind and I've got news for you, you know, that's not the most blissful place in the world. Report an error in the passage at 16:09 Highlight the passage at 16:09

16:55 So that's one myth right there. But to bring out, you know, some realizations because it's easier on the cushion. The yelling person isn't in your face on the cushion, but you practice, you know. Rethinking that. We talked yesterday about realizing that these situations arise due to karma. So you don't blame so much. Report an error in the passage at 16:55 Highlight the passage at 16:55

17:18 And you practice meditating on your cushion, realizing, yes, this person is in my life due to causes and conditions. And then when it happens, when you're off your cushion, you don't react as much. So that's the main point of meditation practice. It's not to have some subjective feeling of bliss. In fact, we're caution. Report an error in the passage at 17:18 Highlight the passage at 17:18

17:39 And in a lot of our vows, all over the bodhisattva vows are these big cautions. Don't get too attached to the subjective feeling that you have from a good meditation. And this is what Lord Buddha found. Before he was a Buddha, before he was enlightened, he studied with several teachers in North India that taught that these kind of rarefied... Report an error in the passage at 17:39 Highlight the passage at 17:39

18:02 States of mental absorption that had side effects of mental and physical bliss were liberation. You know, because you go into this absorption and at very, very high states of concentration, you feel incredible strong feelings of subjective mental and physical bliss. And so these teachers that taught Lord Buddha said, that's the goal. But what did the Buddha realize? Oh, it's just like any other high, you come down. Report an error in the passage at 18:02 Highlight the passage at 18:02

18:30 You know, you come down from that and then you're still stuck in saṃsāra. So he cautioned very strongly against getting attached to those feelings. So I think when we first start practicing, yes, we're so busy. You sit down and watch your breath for 20 minutes. It feels really good because you've just stopped for a change. Report an error in the passage at 18:30 Highlight the passage at 18:30

18:49 You know, when do you just sit and do nothing for 20 minutes? So sometimes it feels really good. And then you resent it when you have to get up off the cushion and get busy again. But Lord Buddha said that's wrong view, that's actual wrong view, to get attached to those feelings and think that's the point. The point is to change your perspective on reality so that then when you're off your cushion you behave differently and suffer less. Report an error in the passage at 18:49 Highlight the passage at 18:49

19:14 So that's one of the things that comes up. For people in the beginning when they engage in practice, it's just sort of misunderstanding the whole point to meditation practice. And often people also resent the fact that they sort of have to balance meditation with a busy life, with work, with families, things like that. Report an error in the passage at 19:14 Highlight the passage at 19:14

19:34 Often people have an interesting projection on monks and nuns. They think that we... Sort of are absorbed in deep samādhi all of the time, except when we sort of glide off our meditation cushion into the hall to just teach from the depth of our realization spontaneously. And I've got news for you, it's not like that at all. You know, that's not what our lives are like. So often lay people have a sort of a... Report an error in the passage at 19:34 Highlight the passage at 19:34

19:58 You know, this sort of fantasized projection and they think, oh, if only I could be a monk or a nun, then everything would be so peaceful and blissful and quiet. Just ask my friends who are sitting in the room how blissful and quiet and peaceful my life is. They'll be happy to tell you. It's sort of like, you know, micromanaging my schedule today has been quite a feat in itself. Report an error in the passage at 19:58 Highlight the passage at 19:58

20:19 Okay, like that. So what do we do with all those hours off the cushion? Maybe if we're lucky, what? 45 minutes? Is that even pushing it? How much time are you actually kind of sitting cross-legged on the cushion in your day? So what do we do with the rest of those 23 hours and 15 minutes of the day? Is it just wasted? Do we have to just get frustrated and hope that we can eke out a week at Spirit Rock from time to time and then depend on that? Report an error in the passage at 20:19 Highlight the passage at 20:19

20:50 Will we be wasting our entire precious human rebirth if that was all? If we just could only practice Dharma when we're actually sitting cross-legged in deep meditation, we'd be wasting our precious human rebirth. We'd be screwed. Here's this incredible opportunity that was so karmically expensive for us to be here in this life with the interest in Dharma, to come on Sunday morning to Se Chin Ling and sit here. Report an error in the passage at 20:50 Highlight the passage at 20:50

21:16 If we had to waste all of that time and couldn't practice, that would be a... Big drag. That would be a terrible shame. So what do we do? How do we practice in daily life? And so there are a couple of tricks of the trade that I'd like to share with you about what do we do with those other 23 hours and 15 minutes of the day. Report an error in the passage at 21:16 Highlight the passage at 21:16

21:35 What do we do? The first thing is exactly what we do for our meditation practice, for our study. We set our motivation. So the very first trick of the trade is first thing in the morning, even before you get out of bed, You know, you wake up, the alarm goes off or whatever, you're lying there. Just take a couple of minutes. It doesn't have to be any big formal thing. You don't have to pull out the thing and recite a lot of prayers. Report an error in the passage at 21:35 Highlight the passage at 21:35

22:02 I mean, you all notice how much I use these prayer books, right? Like anybody who's been in my classes. You know, it doesn't need to be a formal thing. In your mind, set your motivation for the day. There's this beautiful practice, and some of you have been in my thought. Report an error in the passage at 22:02 Highlight the passage at 22:02

22:17 I do a class called Radical Compassion. That's the seven point thought transformation. There's a beautiful practice in there called the five powers. And one of the powers is the very first thing is set your motivation first thing in the morning, even before you get out of bed. In that teaching, we talk about overcoming self-cherishing and serving others, benefiting others. Report an error in the passage at 22:17 Highlight the passage at 22:17

22:41 You lie there in bed and you say, whatever I do today. May I benefit others, you know, may I be kind, may I benefit others, may all of my actions today be meaningful and beneficial and serve others as much as possible. And as His Holiness the Dalai Lama always says, Even if I can't help them, please let me not harm them. At least set the intention not to harm and to benefit as much as you can. And then you find that sets this sort of course correction for the whole day. Report an error in the passage at 22:41 Highlight the passage at 22:41

23:12 Even if you just lose it and never think about benefiting others consciously in that way. You'll notice it has a very powerful effect. It sort of aimed your whole day in this certain direction by just waking up in the morning and setting that intention. And according to the way we talk about Buddhist practice, then it makes your actions more beneficial for others because you've set that motivation for the whole day. Report an error in the passage at 23:12 Highlight the passage at 23:12

23:39 So I think it's really important to just take a few minutes before you do anything. Venerable Roger Kunsang, Lama Zopa Rinpoche's tireless assistant. He's going on something like 25 years of service. And at a certain point when I was working for Lama Zopa, I had a lot of... Contact with him. Well, Lama Zopa gives all of these tantric empowerments with all these practice commitments, right? Roger's always there. He's usually kind of falling asleep because he only gets to sleep like two hours a night because trying to manage Lama Zopa's world is a daunting, exhausting task. Report an error in the passage at 23:39 Highlight the passage at 23:39

24:16 So once I remember talking to him and I was going, so what do you do about all these practice commitments? Like how on earth do you do it? And he goes, You know, well Rinpoche has kind of given me the dispensation that basically, you know, my service is my practice. But he goes, but I really try and set my motivation. Every morning I spend at least 10 or 15 minutes really strongly trying to set my motivation. Report an error in the passage at 24:16 Highlight the passage at 24:16

24:41 So here's one of the busiest people on the face of the planet who at least tries really hard. He goes, I don't have much time for formal practice or retreat or prayers or recitations or any of that stuff. But I really try hard to set my motivation in the morning. And it shows, right? Because then he's kind of going, okay, everything. And that imprint, if we set it every morning, really makes a difference. Report an error in the passage at 24:41 Highlight the passage at 24:41

25:05 We habituate, again, right? Habituation to that imprint. May I serve others? May I benefit others? At least not harm them. Report an error in the passage at 25:05 Highlight the passage at 25:05

25:15 So then we go through the day. Then we get up off the cushion, out of bed, make the coffee and race off to our busy full day. So how do we use the situations that arise as our practice? Most people don't ask questions about how to use their happiest moments as part of the path, right? Everybody wants to know how to use problems. Report an error in the passage at 25:15 Highlight the passage at 25:15

25:37 How do we transform problems? And Lama Tsongkhapa has that famous book, Transforming Problems into Happiness. How do we transform our problems into the path? Usually when something really great is happening, Dharma practice is the farthest thing from our mind. We're just enjoying, you know, great, a little bit of samsaric pleasure at long last. Grasp, grasp, grasp, you know, it creates the cause for more suffering. Report an error in the passage at 25:37 Highlight the passage at 25:37

26:01 But what do we do with our problems? And there are a couple of different levels that I'd like to talk about in terms of practice. And you can kind of work your way up through these different levels. In one level is to use the problems that happen as to reinforce your renunciation, to reinforce your renunciation. Report an error in the passage at 26:01 Highlight the passage at 26:01

26:20 And let's talk about this word renunciation, an often misunderstood concept. Does renunciation mean shaving your head, giving away all your CDs, being, you know, living out of a suitcase and wearing some weird outfit that has small children staring at you in airports? Report an error in the passage at 26:20 Highlight the passage at 26:20

26:40 No, that has nothing to do with renunciation. Renunciation is mental. Renunciation means giving up hope in saṃsāra working out for you. Report an error in the passage at 26:40 Highlight the passage at 26:40

26:55 Chogyam Trungpa Rinpoche, this great holy Lama, I was reading a transcript of one talk he gave once and he said to his students, the first step of the path is giving up hope. And they all freak out, right? Oh my God. Because that's the first step of the path. And I say the same thing. What does that mean? Since beginningless time, we've been trying to, you know, get our external reality like this house of cards perfectly balanced. Report an error in the passage at 26:55 Highlight the passage at 26:55

27:26 So it'll give us happiness. And we put all this energy into getting it balanced out there, right? Like, oh, the perfect job with the perfect boss and enough salary. And then, you know, a good relationship where we're compatible. And then the roof doesn't leak. And the grandchildren are behaving for once. Report an error in the passage at 27:26 Highlight the passage at 27:26

27:47 And, you know, trying to get it all perfectly balanced. Well, what happens? You know, don't breathe because, you know, finally we kind of got it. For God's sakes, you know, clutch on to the ankles of all of those things that you got perfectly balanced. Does it ever work? Is it even happy for you, this stress, this strain, like, oh my God, what am I, oh, you know, my husband was home late from work, is he having an affair? Report an error in the passage at 27:47 Highlight the passage at 27:47

28:18 You know, because God forbid he should leave or anything should change because I just got it all perfectly balanced. It never works. And even if you have the perfect life and you're in love with your partner for 60 years and the grandchildren are successful, what happens? Somebody dies. You know, it's not going to last forever. Even if you can get that house of cards perfectly balanced, you die. Like, there's a, I was just at Miller Repent Center in Vermont, another FBMT Center, and there's this bumper sticker on the refrigerator that says, exercise, eat right, die anyway. Report an error in the passage at 28:18 Highlight the passage at 28:18

28:53 Which is great, and it's true, isn't it? It's like, oh, you know, flaxseed meal and, you know, omega-3s, die anyway. I mean, it's all fine to do all of that stuff. But don't hold out hope that your external reality is fixable. So as one of my teachers said, just accept that saṃsāra is a broken realm. It's not fixable. So problems that happen to you, instead of getting so thrown off, go, what did I think anyway? Report an error in the passage at 28:53 Highlight the passage at 28:53

29:25 Did I think it was going to work out? I had this happen recently. I was living at Land of Medicine Buddha. Blissful place in the redwoods, gardens, swimming pool. Here I am, this Buddhist nun. I get to just talk about Dharma all the time for a living, which is like my favorite thing to do. You know, I don't have to worry about my hairstyle anymore. Life is good. Nice vegetarian food every day cooked by somebody else. Report an error in the passage at 29:25 Highlight the passage at 29:25

29:48 I just go with my plate and load it up. So I'm thinking, wow, things have gotten pretty good. You know, I'm sort of complacent, really blissful. I have these two friends there that I have lunch with every day, a monk and a nun. And then one day the monk says something, if you're listening to this, we've discussed this before, you know, if you're listening to the audio, right? Report an error in the passage at 29:48 Highlight the passage at 29:48

30:12 You always tell stories. So he says something that hurts my feelings, really hurts my feelings, right? Then usually for me when my feelings are hurt, like my trigger for anger is being disrespected and having my feelings hurt. Like those are the real rude emotions and then I get angry. So I'm really angry. And I go to my room because I've learned as a good Buddhist nun, take those emotions to your cushion instead of like exploding in somebody's face. Report an error in the passage at 30:12 Highlight the passage at 30:12

30:38 So I'm sitting there and I was like, oh my God, he really totally. And then I go. Well, what did I think? That we're all going to live happily ever after? I had to laugh at myself because I said, oh, I really kind of thought, yeah, this is my life now and it's so great and it's all going to be perfect. Report an error in the passage at 30:38 Highlight the passage at 30:38

30:54 Then it's like, what? Did I think I didn't have the karma anymore? You know, that somebody was going to say something that hurt my feelings? How silly. So I just had to laugh at myself. You know, I had to laugh at myself. I remember a long time about... How many years ago was it now? About 15 years ago. I was in a long-term relationship, you know, long before I was in a long-term relationship that broke up in this really kind of painful way for me, extremely painful. Report an error in the passage at 30:54 Highlight the passage at 30:54

31:23 And I was the director of a Dharma center in California and there was something about the way the breakup happened that I was wondering if I was going to be able to stay in that center anymore, you know, because it involved other people in the community and it's this little community of eight people and just... Report an error in the passage at 31:23 Highlight the passage at 31:23

31:39 Horrible soap opera mess. So I write to Lama's Open. I didn't tell him the whole soap opera because it's not appropriate. But I just said, could you just see if it's still beneficial for me to be in this situation? I'm not even sure if I can anymore. He writes me back. That was the day of faxes. So I'm staying at a friend's house. Report an error in the passage at 31:39 Highlight the passage at 31:39

31:59 This fax comes through and he says, Like, what did you think, stupid head, that you were going to find lasting happiness in saṃsāra? Only when you're liberated will you find, and I was like, oh my God, I did. You know, I did. I really thought I was going to find lasting happiness, sort of like I had gotten all these teachings, been to these Copan courses. Oh yes, I know nothing lasts except this one relationship. Report an error in the passage at 31:59 Highlight the passage at 31:59

32:23 Just give me this one person. To be permanent. I'll give up everything else. Just this one thing. And then he's just like, well, duh. He goes, you've studied the whole lamrim. What did you think? You know? So I showed this fax to a friend later and she said, oh my God, he was so harsh with you. And I said, no, that's exactly what I needed to hear. Report an error in the passage at 32:23 Highlight the passage at 32:23

32:44 As I realized, yeah, what did I think? You know, that saṃsāra is finally going to work out? Like, oh, since beginning of this time, it hasn't worked out for anybody because I really need it to. It's going to work out for me, you know? So that's one level that we deal with the things that come up in our lives, especially when things are going well and then they fall apart. Report an error in the passage at 32:44 Highlight the passage at 32:44

33:06 You know, the students always disappear when things are going really well. I talked to this student in Colorado last night on the phone, and I was like, I haven't seen you in a long time when I go out to Colorado to teach, like you haven't been around. Oh, I fell in love again, and then we just broke up last week, so I've been calling you, leaving these frantic messages. I was like, I thought that's what it was. You know, it's like when he breaks up with somebody, he appears, and he's really serious about Dharma, and then he falls in love again. Report an error in the passage at 33:06 Highlight the passage at 33:06

33:31 And he's off the radar until he breaks up again. You know, and this is often the way it is. So let's use those things to reinforce our renunciation. Just meaning you don't have to be a monk or a nun. You don't have to give up all of your stuff. But just to realize, what am I going to put my energy into in this life? Report an error in the passage at 33:31 Highlight the passage at 33:31

33:51 Is it going to be all this energy into making that house of cards work perfectly? Or am I just going to work on the causes of happiness inside my own mind? Overcoming the four distortions to start with. Because you're going to suffer less. Every Dharma teaching that was ever taught by Lord Buddha was for the specific purpose of making you suffer less. By getting this realization. Report an error in the passage at 33:51 Highlight the passage at 33:51

34:17 He didn't want us chanting and learning all these weird languages and studying Jeffrey Hopkins books. He just wanted us to suffer less. And that's the point of Dharma practice. So that's one level. The second level, when problems come up, use them to show you what karmic seeds you have in your continuum. Report an error in the passage at 34:17 Highlight the passage at 34:17

34:38 Use it as a mirror. And those of you who've studied karma, there's four effects of any given karmic action. There is the result of the environmental result, what kind of environment you find yourself in as a result. And then there's the rebirth that that karma gives rise to. And then there's the results similar to the cause, meaning what you did in the past tends to happen to you. Report an error in the passage at 34:38 Highlight the passage at 34:38

35:08 And then you have a habit of doing that thing over and over again. And we can work with these last two. When things come up in our lives repeatedly, if you have some repeating pattern in relationships, for example, and I'll use myself as an example, one of the benefits of teaching is you get to confess publicly to all the students. Report an error in the passage at 35:08 Highlight the passage at 35:08

35:32 So this relationship that I was in that I just mentioned, my partner left me for someone else. This was a repeating pattern in my life. Finally, when I wised up and started looking at karma, and in fact Lama Zopa said in that very same facts, what do you think? This is a result of your sexual misconduct karma. Report an error in the passage at 35:32 Highlight the passage at 35:32

35:52 Because it wouldn't be happening if I hadn't created the cause for it. So when things like that happen in your life over and over again, use it to... Look at what kind of causes you're creating, because if you have the result that it keeps happening to you, you probably also have the result that you have some sort of a habit of that kind of action. Report an error in the passage at 35:52 Highlight the passage at 35:52

36:14 Okay, so you've got both of them going on. So you don't want that thing to happen to you anymore? Quit creating the cause for it. Really look at that habit at the very, very, very subtle level. I remember working with another thing in my life, a repeating thing that I felt like I wasn't getting acknowledgement. I was working like a slave in these Dharma centers and nobody appreciated me and I, you know, they didn't ever acknowledge me and nobody thanked me and I was just killing myself. Report an error in the passage at 36:14 Highlight the passage at 36:14

36:43 You know, the whole self-pity martyr thing that we get into, right? Like, sound familiar to anybody? So I was having this thing and I was just, and it was kind of uncanny. I remember this one Dharma center that I lived. One of the members did a... Kind of a news column for the newsletter. I was the director of the center. I never showed up in the news column, ever. Like, I was just like, this is so weird. Report an error in the passage at 36:43 Highlight the passage at 36:43

37:07 Month after month, the news column. What member's son graduated from high school that month? I'm the center director, and my name never... And it was just like, oh my God, this is just too bizarre. She must have to really, you know, deliberately exclude me. And never talk about all these things that I'm doing. And of course I thought I was doing all these wonderful things and I should have had like, you know, 90 % of the news column in my mind, right? Report an error in the passage at 37:07 Highlight the passage at 37:07

37:34 Like this should be reality. So then I started working with Karma and I go, oh, how much do I acknowledge what other people do? You know, and I looked at myself and I looked at the people that work for me. Do they hear that they do a good job often? And I found that no, they'll just hear about it when they do something wrong. You know, I don't go around being grateful to people. Report an error in the passage at 37:34 Highlight the passage at 37:34

38:01 So I get that in my life. Like that reflects back to me that nobody goes around being grateful for all that I do. So I started deliberately. I saw how I'd created that karmic cause for that experience, which for me was really painful. You know, of just not getting any acknowledgement for what I did. So I said, okay, if I want acknowledgement or if I want to just clean out this karma, I need to start going around thanking people. Report an error in the passage at 38:01 Highlight the passage at 38:01

38:29 And it was really hard at first. I had to deliberately go, you know, thank you so much for... Cooking great meals for the retreaters. Thank you so much for organizing the program. And then it became habitual. And it was very interesting. My karma changed almost immediately in terms of acknowledgement. So this is a great way that we can use the things that happen, especially if they're habitual. Report an error in the passage at 38:29 Highlight the passage at 38:29

38:58 When I teach this karma course, there's a karma quiz. And you check off experiences that you have and then you kind of fold over the sheet and see what the karmic causes were. And you can figure out a karmic game plan based on what experiences keep repeating in your life. We're not helpless victims, you know, at all. Report an error in the passage at 38:58 Highlight the passage at 38:58

39:21 If a karma, if you keep having a certain experience, chances are pretty good that you also still have that habit. And it may be very, very, very subtle. One of my teachers used to teach in New York and he tells a story about this woman who is experiencing an environmental karma. She lived in New York. Report an error in the passage at 39:21 Highlight the passage at 39:21

39:42 Karmic results of sexual misconduct is you live in a smelly, dirty place. So she's living on the street in New York. They keep not collecting the garbage. Somehow the garbage truck doesn't go down her street. The garbage is piling up. She has mice and cockroaches, this whole thing. So she goes to him to try and figure out what's the karma that's causing this weird... Report an error in the passage at 39:42 Highlight the passage at 39:42

40:03 thing and they look it up in the scripture and it turns out that it's sexual So he started working with her and she was married and he said, okay, so let's work with the karmic cause. Do you have affairs? Do you cheat on your husband? No, no, I've never done anything like that. Okay, you know, do you flirt with guys at cocktail parties? Report an error in the passage at 40:03 Highlight the passage at 40:03

40:27 No, no, I don't do that either, you know. So he goes, okay. Let's see. So it's got to be something more subtle. So you ride the subway to work. Do you check out guys on the subway without knowing whether they're married or not and you're married? Oops. Busted. So she's riding on the work, some cute guy, and the mind goes off into its thing. And so he said, look at that. Report an error in the passage at 40:27 Highlight the passage at 40:27

40:50 It's very, very subtle. He called it that low-level radiation. Very, very subtle. That habit energy of sexual misconduct, even though it's not manifest, but you've got that habit energy, and you go for that. You go for that habit, and it will clean up this experience that you're having of the dirty, smelly garbage. And it may take a while, but it's those subtle habits that's keeping us from being an enlightened being. Report an error in the passage at 40:50 Highlight the passage at 40:50

41:20 It's not because we're, you know, hitting little old ladies over the head and stealing their pocketbooks. It's not that we're shooting people, right? It's stealing the pencils from work, checking out the guys on the subway, making the long distance phone calls from work. You know, it's these subtle little things where we, you know, just feel like, oh, you know, it's not really wrong. Report an error in the passage at 41:20 Highlight the passage at 41:20

41:45 It's not a big thing. That keeps giving us an unenlightened reality, keeps creating for us an unenlightened reality. So use the experiences that keep coming up for you, those negative experiences you keep having. You can change them. Karma is not fate. It's not destiny. It just means that you created the cause to be having that experience. Report an error in the passage at 41:45 Highlight the passage at 41:45

42:06 If you don't want to be experiencing those things anymore, do something about it. Look at your karma and do something about it. Okay, so that's one. Another level of how we can use difficulties in the path. And then at even another level, we talked a lot yesterday in the emptiness class about mental labeling. Report an error in the passage at 42:06 Highlight the passage at 42:06

42:27 We create our reality through our labeling of it. There's a certain sort of threshold of subjectivity. Our karma forces us to have certain perceptions. That's called the realm that we live in. Whether you're a human or a dog or one of the other realms. But even within that, there's a certain range of subjectivity. Report an error in the passage at 42:27 Highlight the passage at 42:27

42:54 Something happens. We label it a problem. We just see it as something to avoid at all costs. Do we have to label it like that? Can we see it as a lesson? Can we see that annoying person as somebody that we appreciate having in our life? Because we can develop patience. I remember long ago having a conversation with Venerable Roger Kunsong, one of my holy gurus, you know, talking to him. Report an error in the passage at 42:54 Highlight the passage at 42:54

43:24 Oh, I was going into a certain situation in a Dharma center. And we're talking about this situation. I was a very new, very naive Dharma student or I wouldn't have said this thing. And I said to him, oh, I think it'll be okay because like mostly people really like me. You know, I'm kind of nice and people really like me. And he looked at me and said, oh, I'm so sorry to hear that. And I was shocked. I was like, what do you mean? Isn't it good that people like you? Report an error in the passage at 43:24 Highlight the passage at 43:24

43:48 And he goes, well, if you don't have an enemy, what chance do you have to practice patience? He goes, that's really a shame. You know, if everybody's just liking you, then they're just like reinforcing your ego and you don't have a chance to practice patience at all. I was shocked. But I realized later, of course, I go into this situation, nobody likes me at all and I had plenty of chances to practice patience. But when he said that, I realized he's right. Report an error in the passage at 43:48 Highlight the passage at 43:48

44:13 You know, is the problem a problem or is it something that can teach you a lesson? How many times do we grow when things are going so well? Right? Versus when we really have to face a challenge. This happened to me, I remember, in long retreat. I would enter that dark night of the soul. The first couple of times it happened, I would just freak out, thinking, oh, I'm losing my refuge and I won't be able to go on and I'm going to have to leave. Report an error in the passage at 44:13 Highlight the passage at 44:13

44:45 Sarah was taking care of us in this long retreat in Arizona and I was like, oh my God, it's so hot, it's dry, there's rattlesnakes everywhere. I just got bit, oh my God, I can't stand it. But I realized it was those dark nights of the soul was when my ego was really fighting back. And I just had to push through. Sometimes when things are difficult, it's because your practice is really working. And you're working and going down to a deeper level. Report an error in the passage at 44:45 Highlight the passage at 44:45

45:17 Well, your ego and your self-cherishing doesn't like that at all. And it's going to fight back tooth and nail. And that's what causes us to struggle in our Dharma practice. It's like you've got your ego, your self-cherishing. In a chokehold. You know, I love these ancient scriptures. They talk about Māra. Māra is nothing more than your self-cherishing and ego saying, oh, you know, don't go too far. Report an error in the passage at 45:17 Highlight the passage at 45:17

45:42 It's a little intense. You know, you don't have to give up everything. Like trying to derail you from the path. You know, trying to kind of throw up a smoke screen when you're making big changes. Because what's going on? You know, you've got Māra in a chokehold. Half Nelson on the floor. Oh, you know, no, no, don't be too intense. You're going too far. You know, all these things and you can listen to that and you can back off. Report an error in the passage at 45:42 Highlight the passage at 45:42

46:11 But that's when you need to just push through when things are really tough and you find that you push through to the other side of that, you know, dark night of the soul and your perspective is completely different. Report an error in the passage at 46:11 Highlight the passage at 46:11

46:26 Often that's when you're deepening and getting to a subtler level of understanding of the path. I noticed this when I was in this long retreat. I would get these dark nights of the soul and I finally realized and often I felt like I didn't have refuge anymore. Oh my God, everything's kind of shaky and my understanding of refuge is shaky. Report an error in the passage at 46:26 Highlight the passage at 46:26

46:48 Well, I realized it was going to a subtler level. And the previous way of understanding things just wasn't working for me anymore. That's why I was struggling. And if I just persisted in my practice, then I noticed that an even subtler level of understanding would open up for me. And that's what those hard parts are all about, those struggles are all about. And often if it's coming up as a result of Dharma practice, you move through to a deeper level of understanding. Report an error in the passage at 46:48 Highlight the passage at 46:48

47:18 So don't back off when that happens. Just be brave. It's like Lama Zopa Rinpoche said in this book when he was talking about having a direct realization of emptiness. And he said, you know, you're getting close and it's really scary. And at that point, if you back off, you may lose your only chance for having this realization in this lifetime. Report an error in the passage at 47:18 Highlight the passage at 47:18

47:40 And he gave this wonderful kind of evocative metaphor. He said you just have to press through like wading through a raging river. You know, just bravely press through to the other side. And I think this is often the way it is, especially if we start Dharma practice. And it seems like all of a sudden everything is just falling apart. Report an error in the passage at 47:40 Highlight the passage at 47:40

48:00 You know, oh, I was really happy before I started meditating. And now that I've started, you know, nothing is peaceful anymore. I'm looking at my mind. All I see is this garbage. I wish I could go back to watching TV in the 97 channels again. You know, like that was easy. The six pack in the bag of Cheetos in the 97 channels. Report an error in the passage at 48:00 Highlight the passage at 48:00

48:19 That was more peaceful than sitting down and looking at all this garbage in my mind. But the only way to the other side is through, you know, and we just have to be brave and it's not going to be blissful. I mean, I'll just tell you that right now, but it gets better and better and better over time. And you get a deeper feeling of happiness. But it's not like it's just going to be this blissful ride. But really appreciating those moments. Report an error in the passage at 48:19 Highlight the passage at 48:19

48:45 I got to that finally in retreat. I just finally got to this place of like, if things were going well for too long, I would just feel like, oh, I've really got to raise the bar. I'm not practicing well because I've been kind of happy and it's all just been going kind of copacetic for a while. So I need to really up the ante here. I'm not practicing. I haven't had one of those dark nights of the soul in a couple of months now. You know, what's wrong? I'm not practicing well. Report an error in the passage at 48:45 Highlight the passage at 48:45

49:10 So you appreciate those moments. And another level, sort of the highest level, and we practice with this in tantric practice, in highest yoga tantra. So I'll give you a sneak preview for those of you who aren't engaged in those practices. The job description of enlightened beings is to show up to help you on the path. The whole reason for becoming a Buddha is to be able to show up and guide people on the path. Report an error in the passage at 49:10 Highlight the passage at 49:10

49:41 So for those of us sitting in this room on Sunday morning on a beautiful day when we could be out sailing or whatever, what are the chances that an enlightened being... Whose practice for three countless great eons to become a Buddha to guide people who are serious on the path has not shown up for us at some point or another. They may not look like a small brown man dressed in robes sitting on a brocade throne. Report an error in the passage at 49:41 Highlight the passage at 49:41

50:07 You know, chances are, yes, that's one way that Buddhas show up for us. In Master Shantideva's book, Guide to a Bodhisattva's Way of Life, they say that Buddhas emanate as a dog, a bridge or anything else that will... Help sentient beings. So one way of practicing is be pronoid. There's this website called Pronoia and it says, you know, just suspect that everybody around you is trying to make you happy. Report an error in the passage at 50:07 Highlight the passage at 50:07

50:36 And I say just go through life suspecting that everybody around you is conspiring to get you enlightened. Everybody could be an emanation of an enlightened being trying to get you... Liberated, trying to get you enlightened, especially the annoying people, right? What are the chances that Buddhas are going to show up as somebody that goes there, there, dear, patting you on the head and reinforcing your ego? Report an error in the passage at 50:36 Highlight the passage at 50:36

51:02 Very slim, I say. I say they're probably going to show up as that person who just reflects to you the nature of your mind, points out what you need to work on. Isn't it the people that are just like you that bug you the most? Isn't it like that? You know, I really noticed when I started really paying attention, the people that are the most annoying are the ones that exhibit those characteristics that I most hate in myself. Report an error in the passage at 51:02 Highlight the passage at 51:02

51:30 I had a friend once and I had all these friends in Santa Cruz, all these men friends, and she'd just be like, oh God, I can't stand your men friends. There's like these spaced out kind of guys. You know, in Santa Cruz you get a lot of these, well, you know, peace, love and the grateful dead. These guys, you know, I found it kind of endearing. Report an error in the passage at 51:30 Highlight the passage at 51:30

51:48 God, there's space cadets. Why do you hang out? Well, I don't have a spaced out bone in my body. I'm so intense. Most people are like, oh my God, just calm down. So to me, that's not at all triggering when people are spaced out. I find it kind of cute and endearing. I was staying with a friend in Colorado. Report an error in the passage at 51:48 Highlight the passage at 51:48

52:10 One of these guys, you know, for two days right before I taught in this prison, he was constantly, like, locking the door and forgetting the key, and he had to crawl through the dog door, you know. He was a Chesapeake Bay retriever. We were joking, and I said, you know, if it were me, I'd never fit. It would be like Pooh Bear in the story when he gets stuck in Rabbit's Hole, and then they'd be using my legs as towel racks, you know. Report an error in the passage at 52:10 Highlight the passage at 52:10

52:31 I'd say, you know, your sister doesn't. We're staying at his sister's house, you know. She didn't have a Great Dane. But he's this little guy, and he could just, you know. Here we go, come home from wherever we were. And he's like, oh, I did it again, like day after day. It was cute. You know, my other friend would have been totally annoyed because that would have triggered her. So what's triggering for me when people are really domineering and controlling, right? Report an error in the passage at 52:31 Highlight the passage at 52:31

52:56 Because that's the part of me that I can't stand. And I can't stand being around people that are like that, you know, because that's what they're mirroring for me. So all these people, the most annoying people. You know, look at them as mirrors to show you what you don't accept about yourself. I think a big part of the path is just self-acceptance. Report an error in the passage at 52:56 Highlight the passage at 52:56

53:16 I learned that in this long retreat. Some people say, you know, what was the main realization that you had over all of those years of long retreat? And I said, I learned to make friends with myself, finally. I learned to accept myself as a mixed bag. Yeah, I've got those controlling, domineering parts of myself. You know, instead of hating them and wishing they'd go away and being in denial about them, okay, that's part of me. Report an error in the passage at 53:16 Highlight the passage at 53:16

53:42 I've got some good qualities too. It's a mixed bag. So use those people that are triggering. Chances are very high. I would put it at about 99.9 % that the people that bug you the most are the people that are reflecting some aspect of yourself that you're not accepting. Report an error in the passage at 53:42 Highlight the passage at 53:42

54:00 So learn to accept that aspect. And then if you don't like it, change it by working with your karma. That's all. That's the way we can use those difficult people. And then be pronoid. Suspect that everybody is around you. You know, the more annoying the better are probably enlightened beings. At least go around that way and then they will be that for you. You know, they will be your greatest teachers if you have that attitude. Report an error in the passage at 54:00 Highlight the passage at 54:00

54:30 And then you're learning from everybody. You don't have to wait and get in line to get tickets for His Holiness the Dalai Lama. I mean, do that too. By all means, you know, come to Geshe Dagpa's classes. Come to class. But that's a way to use the other 23 hours and 15 minutes. Just see everybody that you run into as a teacher. Report an error in the passage at 54:30 Highlight the passage at 54:30

54:48 Who's to say they're not? And tell your clairvoyant, you don't know if they're a Buddha or not. So just act as if they are. And then they will be. And you'll progress along the path like really fast. And this is a special technique that we use in the highest level of practice. Just acting like everyone around us is an enlightened being. Report an error in the passage at 54:48 Highlight the passage at 54:48

55:09 Conspiring to get you enlightened. And then watch the fireworks. Your practice will really take off and there will be no more resentment. Oh, I only got 25 minutes on the cushion this morning because I had to take the kids to school. You know, forget about that. Forget about it. That's not what practice is all about. Report an error in the passage at 55:09 Highlight the passage at 55:09

55:29 And then in conclusion, it's kind of the last thing, so we've got the whole day, right? We set our motivation at the beginning of the day. Before you even get out of bed, just set up, sit up, set your motivation for a couple of minutes. It doesn't have to be some big formal thing. Then if you have time to do formal prayers to set your motivation, that's great too. Report an error in the passage at 55:29 Highlight the passage at 55:29

55:50 Then during the day you're practicing on these three different levels. Using problems to remind you of renunciation. Using them to mirror what karmic causes that you've been creating to have that experience and what you still need to work on. And then at the highest level, looking at them as lessons for you. Report an error in the passage at 55:50 Highlight the passage at 55:50

56:10 And all those people that are showing up, especially the ones that bug you, are your greatest teachers. So those different levels of working with problems. Then at the end of the day, review your day. Review your day. In some other classes I've talked about this practice that some of us have been doing for years, this book, where every couple of hours you check your mind, check what's going on for you. Report an error in the passage at 56:10 Highlight the passage at 56:10

56:37 How am I doing? With the ten non-virtues, if you don't have any other vows, check how you're doing every couple of hours with the ten non-virtues. So at the end of the day, if you have other vows, if you have refuge commitments, bodhisattva vows, You know, lay vows, you can check those as well. And then at the end of the day, review your day. Just go over how did it go? Report an error in the passage at 56:37 Highlight the passage at 56:37

57:00 Is there anything that I did that I felt was unskillful, you know, that I'd like to work on? You know, review the day. And then engage in purification practice at the end of the day for the negativities that you've done. There are formal purification practices like Vajrasattva meditation that many of you may have done in classes, you know, engaging in purification. Report an error in the passage at 57:00 Highlight the passage at 57:00

57:23 We don't have time to really go over it now, but purification with the four opponent powers. And if you don't know how that's done, Venerable Chogky in the back of the room would be happy to help you out. She's your girl to teach you how to purify your old negativities. It's also really important to rejoice about the good stuff you do. Report an error in the passage at 57:23 Highlight the passage at 57:23

57:42 You know, we have this terrible epidemic in the West of low self-esteem. And sometimes we use our Dharma practice to just reinforce our neurosis. And I'm a big proponent and, you know, don't do that. It's okay to rejoice and to feel good about what you've done well. Don't worry about pride and arrogance. It's not like that. If you've helped somebody, you know, if you've done things to serve beings, for God's sakes, rejoice about it. Report an error in the passage at 57:42 Highlight the passage at 57:42

58:10 It deepens the imprint. Be happy about virtue. In fact, that's the definition of the perfection of joyous effort. Getting off on virtue. Being happy at doing virtuous things. You know, being happy about that. And so that deepens the imprint of your happiness and joyfulness in virtue. Rejoicing. And do your purification practice. And then at the very end, dedicate anything that you did that day that was virtuous. Report an error in the passage at 58:10 Highlight the passage at 58:10

58:41 Towards your future enlightenment, you know, put it in the karmic bank account for your future enlightenment. Otherwise, all that virtue will just be wasted on more hamburgers, music and girlfriends, you know, on samsaric pleasures. We don't want that. Since beginning of this time, we've been having all of these wonderful like Deva realm rebirths with the peeled grapes and nectar and all of that stuff. Report an error in the passage at 58:41 Highlight the passage at 58:41

59:05 It hasn't gotten us anywhere. Here we sit today at Tse Chin Ling. You know, we don't want all of our virtue to just be wasted on... You know, these wonderful upper realm rebirths filled with all kinds of samsaric pleasure and then our karma wears out and where do we go next? You know, so seal it. Put it in the karmic bank account at the very end of the day with your dedication to your future enlightenment, not just for your own sake, but to benefit all beings. Report an error in the passage at 59:05 Highlight the passage at 59:05

59:33 And so this is a way that you can utilize the other 23 hours and 15 minutes of the day. Minus, you know, maybe six or seven hours of sleep. There's dream yoga, but that's a whole other story. We'll get there at some point, okay? Okay, so any questions, comments? Now we can just open it up. We've got about another half hour. So using the mic, could we pass it back? Report an error in the passage at 59:33 Highlight the passage at 59:33

1:00:01 So anything, this can be the open mic session of the program. Report an error in the passage at 1:00:01 Highlight the passage at 1:00:01

1:00:09 So I have a rant, and then after that I... I'm wondering about advice. So my question for you is, let's say you've been walking down the path of Dharma. You've been doing a Dharma practice for a really long time and you're starting to feel like every day that you have to sit down on your meditative cushion. Report an error in the passage at 1:00:09 Highlight the passage at 1:00:09

1:00:29 It's starting to like, like basically you lost your chance of spontaneity every day and you kind of, basically you just have a lot of doubt about. Where you are on your practice and you start to kind of regret that you've been in that space. So my question or just advice from you is how do you get away from that and kind of... Report an error in the passage at 1:00:29 Highlight the passage at 1:00:29

1:00:59 back the compassion and the joy that you once had on your practice yeah and How do you also, when that happens, look at it and realize that it is probably karma and it is something that you are trying to work through, but you're having a hard time kind of getting out of that. That's a great question. Yeah, because a lot of times I think we feel like you've been doing a practice for a long time and then it just goes kind of stale, doesn't it? Report an error in the passage at 1:00:59 Highlight the passage at 1:00:59

1:01:26 It just gets kind of flat and it's not giving you the subjective experience that it used to give you and you feel like you're not progressing at all. And there are a couple of different things that you could try for that because I think it's extremely, I mean, how many people have felt that way? Like everybody, right? Report an error in the passage at 1:01:26 Highlight the passage at 1:01:26

1:01:44 Eric hasn't felt that way. We'll have to talk about that later on. Good for you. Maybe he should come up here, you know, because I definitely have. And I remember actually when I left Long Retreat, it was for exactly that. Reason, because everything had gone really flat and stale. And I realized my bodhicitta motivation had gone flat. Report an error in the passage at 1:01:44 Highlight the passage at 1:01:44

1:02:06 And for me, that was the main thing that gave my practice juice, is really thinking, the reason I'm sitting down on this cushion and doing this practice right now is not just for my own sake, but it's to benefit other beings. So I think one of the things that I would suggest is kind of get back in touch with the motivation. Report an error in the passage at 1:02:06 Highlight the passage at 1:02:06

1:02:28 Bodhicitta motivation, even the motivation of renunciation, of wanting your own liberation. You know, you kind of go through it by rote because you haven't checked back into, for example, the Four Noble Truths. You know, why am I doing this anyway? What's my motivation for doing it? Some Lama told me I had to do it or some teacher said, sit like this for a half hour. Report an error in the passage at 1:02:28 Highlight the passage at 1:02:28

1:02:48 Every morning, that's not going to go very far in terms of motivation. But if you really meditate, especially on like in the stages of the path teachings on the cause of our suffering. You know, the reality of our samsaric, unenlightened existence and that it's just there's no exit apart from liberation. And getting back in touch with the reason behind doing these practices and maybe studying and generating more faith in why you're doing that practice. Report an error in the passage at 1:02:48 Highlight the passage at 1:02:48

1:03:16 You know, it may have been that you've lost sort of the perspective on what's the reason. If I'm sitting watching my breath. For half an hour every morning and maybe it seems like a waste of time. Go back and study the four foundations of mindfulness. You know, go back and get a good teaching on the purpose for doing that practice because it may be that you've lost perspective on why you should be doing that in the first place and its role in the path, in the whole perspective of things. Report an error in the passage at 1:03:16 Highlight the passage at 1:03:16

1:03:46 So I think sometimes just backtracking and reminding yourself, oh yeah, you know, this is... The truth of suffering, the truth of the cause, the truth of cessation. And then there's a path that leads to the cessation. And that's why I'm sitting down cross-legged every morning, is to get myself out of this endless cycle of suffering. Report an error in the passage at 1:03:46 Highlight the passage at 1:03:46

1:04:06 And going back to the very beginning levels, I think we need to revisit. The very first stages of the path over and over again, you know, to remind ourselves of our reason for engaging in practice. Don't think, oh, now I'm advanced, all of that Four Noble Truth stuff or all of that, you know, lower scope of the lamrim stuff. I'm past that. Report an error in the passage at 1:04:06 Highlight the passage at 1:04:06

1:04:29 Revisit it over and over because we all need that, you know, re-energized. You know, why? Like when Lama Zopa wrote me that fax and said, you know better. You know, stupid head, don't you know? And I realized I'd lost touch with, oh yeah, duh. You know, I'm only going to find lasting happiness when I'm liberated. Report an error in the passage at 1:04:29 Highlight the passage at 1:04:29

1:04:51 And it really re-energized my practice. It was like a, you know, bucket of cold water in the face of like, why am I doing this anyway? So I think sometimes when our practices go flat, we need to go back to the very beginning of the path. And just revisit, why did we engage anyway? You know, remember what was going on for you when you got into Dharma in the first place and why you decided to start doing Dharma practice. Report an error in the passage at 1:04:51 Highlight the passage at 1:04:51

1:05:15 Also, I think sometimes we need to change our practice around a little bit. You know, we don't have to do the same thing every morning until saṃsāra ends. You know, as long as it has certain components. And then sometimes I think to keep it fresh. Report an error in the passage at 1:05:15 Highlight the passage at 1:05:15

1:05:30 That was one of the reasons that I love the Tibetan tradition so much because there's this huge toolkit of different practices, you know, and you pull different ones out. Maybe the practice has gone flat because it's not really what you need for what you're going through in the moment and you need something else. So pull something else out of the toolkit, you know, mix things up a little bit. Report an error in the passage at 1:05:30 Highlight the passage at 1:05:30

1:05:51 Like that's one of the nice things in the Tibetan tradition. There are so many. Options. And I think when we have that toolkit, we can sort of, you know, figure out what tool do I need for what mental affliction du jour is happening, you know, for us right now and pull it out like that. So I think motivation and just being not so kind of rigid in our practice and like looking at it again. Another thing that will juice up your practice is to go back to purification and accumulation of merit. Report an error in the passage at 1:05:51 Highlight the passage at 1:05:51

1:06:23 Especially if you feel like your motivation is going flat and going stale. This happened to me when I was in long retreat. My bodhicitta was going flat. Oh, I'm practicing for the benefit of all sentient beings. Who are they? I haven't seen any of them in six and a half years. My own suffering was extremely immediate and I'm like, yeah, right, whatever. Report an error in the passage at 1:06:23 Highlight the passage at 1:06:23

1:06:47 So that was one of the reasons I came out of retreat. And then all I had to do was show up and start teaching. Oh my God, the suffering of sentient beings. And it was great for me. It was really great for me. It's like I got back into the world again, which I really needed. So I think also look at, okay, if that motivation for practice isn't there, do something. Engage in some service. Get back in touch with the suffering. Report an error in the passage at 1:06:47 Highlight the passage at 1:06:47

1:07:16 You know, for me, Dharma teaching, I think it's really all about me. I don't think I really benefit beings. I sit up here and tell these stories and go blah, blah, blah. But it's great for me because people call me on the phone. Help me. I'm suffering. You know, this friend called me last night. I'm struggling. I'm feeling suicidal. You know, she broke up with me again and here I am again. Report an error in the passage at 1:07:16 Highlight the passage at 1:07:16

1:07:37 The inmates, the prison work, forget about it, talking to them about what they're going through. So engage in something that revitalizes that sense of, yeah, there's an urgency here. If things go flat, you need to light the fire under your practice, especially in terms of getting back in touch with that motivation of compassion. Report an error in the passage at 1:07:37 Highlight the passage at 1:07:37

1:08:01 And for me, one of the reasons I went into retreat in the first place was so much frustration that I didn't have any wisdom to help beings at all. You know, I felt like at that point I had a lot of compassion and I just kept effing up all the time. You know, I try and do these things to benefit beings and they just get mad at me or whatever. You know, I just keep totally messing up. And then coming out was when I felt like, OK, now I've worked on, you know, generating some more. Report an error in the passage at 1:08:01 Highlight the passage at 1:08:01

1:08:29 But now I need the bodhicitta to amp up again. So they say in our tradition it's like the two wings of a bird. And things can't get too out of balance. If the compassion is too out of balance, you end up burning out. There's this tradition of social and political activists and they have a word for it. Report an error in the passage at 1:08:29 Highlight the passage at 1:08:29

1:08:47 They call it compassion burnout. Because you care so much and you want to see change so much and you're so attached to the outcome because you don't have any wisdom and any understanding of cause. and effect and you think that I by myself you know by myself I'm going to be able to change Does that help at all? Report an error in the passage at 1:08:47 Highlight the passage at 1:08:47

1:09:22 Okay. Okay, yeah, yeah, just a few of those things. You know, from a survivor of many sort of dry, lifeless meditation sessions, those are the things that have helped for me. Report an error in the passage at 1:09:22 Highlight the passage at 1:09:22

1:09:36 Any other questions? Yeah, a couple over here. Report an error in the passage at 1:09:36 Highlight the passage at 1:09:36

1:09:48 I'm still trying to figure out what to do about flea control for my cats. I couldn't take all the refuge vows because I couldn't take the vow of no killing. Report an error in the passage at 1:09:48 Highlight the passage at 1:09:48

1:10:00 Myself, you know, I could put on the skin so soft, It didn't work well on my cats and they're scratching and they're suffering from fleas. But technically, like the advantage of the front line that you put on the back of their necks, that kills the fleas. So I can pretty much get around the killing ants or other insects, but the fleas I haven't found what to do. And I've read Lama's opus books and he even talks about, you know, I guess there were cockroaches in the center in Singapore and he said, well, they have a right to be there too and it's your karma to have cockroaches. So I know he has really strong feelings about killing insects. Report an error in the passage at 1:10:00 Highlight the passage at 1:10:00

1:10:47 So what can I do? Well, there are a couple of levels of things that you can do. One thing is I think there's some... There's a medication now that you can give them that actually sterilizes the fleas so that they don't reproduce but doesn't kill them. And that way, you know, if you give your cat this medicine, after one or two life cycles, you know, the fleas, I think they lay eggs, but they're no longer viable anymore. Report an error in the passage at 1:10:47 Highlight the passage at 1:10:47

1:11:15 So you might want to investigate that. I think that exists because it doesn't actually kill the fleas. It just sterilizes them and then you don't have to worry about that. Another thing, there are a lot of herbal things that work pretty well. Penny Royal, Citronella, things like that. They're a big hassle, you know, because you have to keep, you put on the like cloth flea collar and you keep putting the Penny Royal oil on. Report an error in the passage at 1:11:15 Highlight the passage at 1:11:15

1:11:39 And then you vacuum the carpet and dump out the, you know, drive to a vacant lot, dump out the garbage bag. It's a hassle. It's a hassle. I have a friend who keeps golden retrievers. Every night he flea combs the dogs, puts the hair in the fleas in a jar and drives across town and lets them go in a vacant lot. Report an error in the passage at 1:11:39 Highlight the passage at 1:11:39

1:12:00 So he won't have the killing karma. So a lot of times it just means that you put in that. effort, you know, to actually... It's a big hassle and it's easier to just put the thing on that kills them. But if you really want to be kind of strict about keeping that non-killing, you go through the hassle and you do it. Report an error in the passage at 1:12:00 Highlight the passage at 1:12:00

1:12:19 You vacuum up the... The eggs and the fleas and let them go out of the vacuum cleaner bag and you go through all of that stuff. So that's what I would recommend. One of my friends who had this question from a student who had a dog said, if you absolutely 100 % feel like there's no other option than engaging in killing, do practices for the benefit of those fleas before you kill them. Report an error in the passage at 1:12:19 Highlight the passage at 1:12:19

1:12:47 He said this woman had a dog, who approached him had a dog. He said, take the dog to a stupa, walk it around the stupa, recite a bunch of prayers, get that animal liberation book that Lama Zopa has published with all the prayers, just as if you were liberating animals specifically, if you bought a bunch of worms from the fishing store and were liberating them, and at least do as much as you can for the benefit of those fleas, generate a strong sense of regret. Report an error in the passage at 1:12:47 Highlight the passage at 1:12:47

1:13:15 In yourself so that you won't get a complete killing karma, right? Because the four things that make it complete are, you know, the basis, which would be the flea, the intention, you know, which one of the components of intention is motivation, and then the action and then the sense of satisfaction that you get. Report an error in the passage at 1:13:15 Highlight the passage at 1:13:15

1:13:33 So if both of those two are missing, you know, if you completely regret. Having to do this and then you generate a sense of like instead of satisfaction from doing it, oh I wish there was some way around it. At least it will mitigate a little bit. You know, the karma from having killed the fleas. But to engage in whatever practices you can to benefit the fleas, even though you feel completely ridiculous reciting these mantras over your cat's back. Report an error in the passage at 1:13:33 Highlight the passage at 1:13:33

1:14:00 But do it. Just do it anyway. Because at least you'll benefit them. But I would experiment more with the laborious methods of... You know, essential oils and flea combing. And it's a hassle. And that's why a lot of us choose not to have pets. Quite frankly, like as a monastic, I love animals. I mean, I just have this total thing about animals. But one of the reasons that we choose not to is because we have to kind of engage in these difficult decisions about parasites. Report an error in the passage at 1:14:00 Highlight the passage at 1:14:00

1:14:31 You know, it's bad enough our own when we travel to India. And then you're like, should I take the worm medicine or not? But then... When you have a pet, it's kind of constant with the fleas. So one of my friends says, you know, he has a cat and he's kind of going through this thing and he said, okay, after this cat dies, that's it, no more pets because I just can't engage in this and have to make these decisions. Report an error in the passage at 1:14:31 Highlight the passage at 1:14:31

1:14:51 But I would try some of the alternative things. Talk to the vet about this medicine. I wish I knew what it was called. I should research it so I could recommend that actually just sterilizes them without killing them because maybe that will... That will help. And then if you can keep the cat free by using some of the herbal things, no new ones will jump on and then the old ones will end up kind of living out their life cycle. Report an error in the passage at 1:14:51 Highlight the passage at 1:14:51

1:15:17 So I would try that. Using flea busters in the carpet, it kind of desiccates the larva. Is that still killing an insect if it's an egg form? Yeah, it's better to, you know, we consider, for example, abortion. Report an error in the passage at 1:15:17 Highlight the passage at 1:15:17

1:15:36 So it would be, I think, kind of a similar thing to that. I think better to sterilize them so that they don't have a viable, you know, viable eggs is better, strictly speaking. Report an error in the passage at 1:15:36 Highlight the passage at 1:15:36

1:15:50 Thank you. Ty, did you have something? Yeah. So obviously, in terms of, you know, Dharma off of a meditation mat, like... Causing happiness for other sentient beings is a pretty important thing. And I'm going to go with three examples here to kind of try and explain my question. At some times in my life, I think when I've been really deluded, I've given someone something that they wanted that very quickly and very directly, even though it momentarily made them happy, very quickly turned around and made them very unhappy. Report an error in the passage at 1:15:50 Highlight the passage at 1:15:50

1:16:28 Something really dangerous. And then just last night, I went and saw my friend's new apartment and I saw their cat who used to live with me. And I totally ignored them and I spent all my time, you know, fussing over the cat. And the cat was really happy when I was there. But it was presumably maybe sad when I left and it would miss me. Report an error in the passage at 1:16:28 Highlight the passage at 1:16:28

1:16:52 And then there's the other example of, like you said, you know, maybe an emanation of a... Buddha or Bodhisattva comes to you and what they do to you may be in the moment almost unpleasant, but in the end it's really exactly what you needed and it's so beneficial. But I feel like me as a person, I'm not in a place where I can say like, oh yeah, I'm going to smack you in the face and you'll have a realization. So how do you deal with being an unenlightened being and trying to benefit others? Report an error in the passage at 1:16:52 Highlight the passage at 1:16:52

1:17:20 And also like if you know that you, if you can give someone samsaric happiness, is that wrong? Right, right, right. Right. That's great. Excellent. Perfect. Great question. On one level, I would say it's great that you're feeling all of that stuff because it spurs you on to get all the qualities of a fully enlightened being because then you know exactly what to do. Report an error in the passage at 1:17:20 Highlight the passage at 1:17:20

1:17:42 You know, because it's frustrating, isn't it? It's like you're going out there with all these great intentions and then you just don't have a clue what's really going to work for people. And that's exactly why we need to become fully enlightened. You know, it's that. And that frustration for me has been a great motivator in my practice of like I care so much and I don't have a bloody clue, you know, and I just feel like I'm flailing around and half the time I completely miss the marker. Report an error in the passage at 1:17:42 Highlight the passage at 1:17:42

1:18:08 It backfires and then it ends up being a total. So in a way, it's great that you're feeling that way, because if you can only think, wow, if only I had some wisdom behind it, you know, if only I knew, if only I could see that being's karma, if only I knew what would really help them. So it really motivates you on the path. And I think another thing is, you know, with... Report an error in the passage at 1:18:08 Highlight the passage at 1:18:08

1:18:35 In practice, your wisdom increases. It's not sort of like, oh, I'm clueless until the day that I'm a Buddha. You know, on the path, I think your wisdom about what will really make someone happy increases and becomes more and more effective and more and more appropriate for the circumstance. Also, I've noticed this thing in my life that's been quite interesting is often... Report an error in the passage at 1:18:35 Highlight the passage at 1:18:35

1:19:01 My motivation is really mixed. I want to make somebody happy so that they'll like me. Right. It's really all about me. It's like, oh, I want to be I engaged in extremely dysfunctional, people pleasing behavior for the better part of this rebirth. You know, and it was like doing these things that were actually really dysfunctional that wouldn't, you know, all that codependent enabling stuff. And it's not really that it's about. Report an error in the passage at 1:19:01 Highlight the passage at 1:19:01

1:19:28 Helping that person or making them happy, right? It's about like my sense of self-worth and if they like me and if I'm nice and I do that dance, you know, then they'll like me and I'll feel good about myself. So I think one of the things that you learn on the path too is you're more willing to take risks and sometimes be hard with people and harsh with people if you feel like they're doing something. Report an error in the passage at 1:19:28 Highlight the passage at 1:19:28

1:19:51 That isn't so healthy for them. And I've noticed that in myself. In fact, the student that I talked to last night on the phone, you know, the last time I talked to him, he's like, God, you're so harsh. You know, you're so hard on me because I just like straighten up, dude. You know, what do you think? And sometimes I have to speak strongly with him to try and like wake him up and kind of shake. Report an error in the passage at 1:19:51 Highlight the passage at 1:19:51

1:20:13 So sometimes doing the. The point is sometimes doing the most beneficial thing isn't necessarily going to be the thing that makes that person feel good in the moment and make them happy in the moment. And sometimes you have to say hard things to people to help wake them up. And with more and more practice and more and more wisdom, you can act more appropriately on that. Report an error in the passage at 1:20:13 Highlight the passage at 1:20:13

1:20:35 On that level, you know, so I think just to be patient with yourself and that it does advance and also look at how mixed is your motivation. You know, is making someone happy in the moment really the smartest thing, whereas maybe saying something a little more difficult for them to hear would be the wisest thing in that moment. Report an error in the passage at 1:20:35 Highlight the passage at 1:20:35

1:20:56 And it gives them happiness in the long run. You know, it's sort of like that short term happiness versus. You know, waking them up. Not at all in any kind of sort of self-righteous, preachy way ever. But if you feel like there's an appropriate way to sort of show somebody, you know, that they're doing something that's dysfunctional, even if it makes you unpopular in the moment, you know, go ahead and do it. Report an error in the passage at 1:20:56 Highlight the passage at 1:20:56

1:21:21 Yeah, it's hard though. It's really hard. I completely hear. What you're saying, but I think it just progresses as your wisdom increases and as you go through more stuff, right? So much of the way that we can help other people is like, I've been there. I've been through that and this is what helped me, you know, and really seeing other people's experience and the more you've had a similar experience, the more you can able to be truly beneficial and not just about making them happy in the moment by giving them something that will just increase their samsaric attachment too. Report an error in the passage at 1:21:21 Highlight the passage at 1:21:21

1:21:53 It's like, oh, is it really to provide something for somebody that's just going to increase their clinging in saṃsāra, whereas to withhold that in the short term is more beneficial in the long term. Report an error in the passage at 1:21:53 Highlight the passage at 1:21:53

1:22:07 But it's hard. But use it to spur you on to Buddhahood, because that's really the ultimate answer to all of this, to have all that wisdom, to understand the being's karma, to understand their past lives, to know exactly what... To do and say in that moment to help them, which is why these Tibetan llamas act the way they do. You know, they're not going around patting you on the head. Report an error in the passage at 1:22:07 Highlight the passage at 1:22:07

1:22:29 I mean, for me, being around Lama Zopa Rinpoche is usually a very painful experience because he's just calling me on my stuff constantly. And it's like, oh, you know, it's not like he's going, oh, you're so good. And you're really trying to benefit. It's usually just like, what are you doing? Like, look at that. It's awful, you know. Report an error in the passage at 1:22:29 Highlight the passage at 1:22:29

1:22:48 So gaining the wisdom to be appropriate in our behavior is important. But you're doing great. You really got that 12 links thing. That's awesome. Other questions? Yeah, Sarah. I have a question about the karma of seeing other people having problems. Report an error in the passage at 1:22:48 Highlight the passage at 1:22:48

1:23:10 When I have things in my life, I sort of understand your teaching on dealing with that karma and how to work with it and change it. But karma... having someone else in your life having difficulties right What is the karma of having to see other people in your life having problems? Yeah, well I think a lot of times when you're in a close relationship with somebody, you know, you... Report an error in the passage at 1:23:10 Highlight the passage at 1:23:10

1:23:39 It's not like you share their karma, but you certainly share their experience, right? Like if you're married in a close relationship, that person's suffering. Actually, you're suffering because of that person's suffering. So in a way, you're really sharing their experience. And in a way, I think by sharing that experience, you can look at what you did to create the experience yourself. Report an error in the passage at 1:23:39 Highlight the passage at 1:23:39

1:24:06 Kind of use the same technique, I think. You know, if you were having the experience that they're having yourself, which in a way you are because you're kind of close enough that you're sharing it, and then still look at what you might be doing to create that in your life, right? So it's more subtle, but still if it's your partner, for example, that is experiencing something, it's rubbing off on you. Report an error in the passage at 1:24:06 Highlight the passage at 1:24:06

1:24:30 And in a way you're experiencing a similar thing. So I think you can use the same technique as if you were experiencing it yourself. And then help them with that insight to work on their karma, especially if you have some insight in what they're doing to create that. You know, you can help them and work with them to change their karma. But that's a hard one. But it's still part of your experience. You know, you're still having the karma to be... Report an error in the passage at 1:24:30 Highlight the passage at 1:24:30

1:24:55 Suffering and sharing that experience with them. So I think it's kind of a subtler, lower level, but you can use the same kind of techniques for that. Yeah, yeah. I was in a relationship once with someone and I never had the karma to have financial trouble. In this one long-term relationship I was in, my partner was always having trouble. Report an error in the passage at 1:24:55 Highlight the passage at 1:24:55

1:25:18 With finances, and of course it reflected on me, you know, and then I had to look at, wow, what am I, you know, what am I, karma am I creating to be experiencing this? Because then our karma was mixed, we were sharing resources and all of a sudden it becomes a problem suddenly even though I'd never had that karma before or since. Report an error in the passage at 1:25:18 Highlight the passage at 1:25:18

1:25:38 So in that certain relationship that was ripening and I had to take responsibility for that too and say I'm doing something to create this too because it's a shared experience. Report an error in the passage at 1:25:38 Highlight the passage at 1:25:38

1:25:50 And what is Sati experiencing right now? Do you have a question? Do you have a question? You want to talk into the microphone? Report an error in the passage at 1:25:50 Highlight the passage at 1:25:50

1:26:00 You want to just say hi? Hi. Report an error in the passage at 1:26:00 Highlight the passage at 1:26:00

1:26:10 Any other questions? We've got a couple of minutes. Eric's got one. So thank you. Beautiful. So what came through, one of the things that came through when you were talking is, This idea of giving up hope, the renunciation part. And for me, my perspective on things is that effort that people and myself go through to sort of make it good here now, right? Report an error in the passage at 1:26:10 Highlight the passage at 1:26:10

1:26:39 To make it be happy through struggle. In that struggle, I see it as being very beautiful. There's something really beautiful about people. They're almost doing what you were talking about, sort of going upriver. river, slugging through, trying to make it work, not breathing. And I see that as being beautiful in many ways. I see it as this kind of human spirit, love, cherishing life, taking risk, all those qualities in wanting it to be happy, wanting to make it right. Report an error in the passage at 1:26:39 Highlight the passage at 1:26:39

1:27:15 And so a part of me with that perspective that I'm having, This idea of sort of writing it all off and saying it's hopeless. Sure, I can maybe take that on for my practice, but when I'm interfacing with others in my world, I would never really want to break that, right? Because that hope that people have is a key ingredient, I think, to our human experience. Report an error in the passage at 1:27:15 Highlight the passage at 1:27:15

1:27:44 So maybe I'm asking, like, how is there another way to kind of talk about it rather than writing it all off as being hopeless and that just, you know, find this other way. In other words, it's trying to get rid of the duality between, say, the Buddhist path and non-Buddhist path. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So it's... Report an error in the passage at 1:27:44 Highlight the passage at 1:27:44

1:28:07 Yeah, I understand. It's interesting because I guess I have a really different perspective when I see people really striving after that kind of happiness that for me seems unattainable. For me it seems incredibly sad. It's like the saddest thing. I remember when I came back from living in India in the early 90s for a while and I remember coming back. Report an error in the passage at 1:28:07 Highlight the passage at 1:28:07

1:28:08 I mean, you understand what I'm saying? Yeah, I understand. Report an error in the passage at 1:28:08 Highlight the passage at 1:28:08

1:28:33 And in India, you'd seen this really abject suffering, like the lepers on the side of the road, missing body parts. And, you know, it's real kind of the suffering of suffering was all over the place. And then I remember coming back and living in Santa Cruz and having extreme culture shock. Like it was so hard for me those first months coming back. Report an error in the passage at 1:28:33 Highlight the passage at 1:28:33

1:28:53 And I remember going for some reason to the Capitola Mall, you know, the shopping mall filled with department stores. And I remember walking around with this fresh perspective of having, you know, studied Dharma for a while, walking around the mall and seeing this sort of desperation of the people who thought that like, you know, they had the date with the guy on Saturday night and if they only bought the perfect dress that then, you know, the Cinderella thing and they'd go out and like live happily ever after. Report an error in the passage at 1:28:53 Highlight the passage at 1:28:53

1:29:25 And from my experience of studying Dharma, I just thought, oh my God, that's even more tragic in a way than the leper kind of sitting by the side of the road who thinks they know why they're suffering, right? They may not have an understanding of saṃsāra, but they think they know why they're suffering. And then there's these people who put all this effort into it and they don't understand why it's not working. Report an error in the passage at 1:29:25 Highlight the passage at 1:29:25

1:29:47 And to me, that's kind of the ultimate tragedy. I remember on the airplane, I told this story yesterday. It's interesting on the airplane when they're showing the little whatever they show in the movie or the news clips and you don't have the earphones in and you're trying to kind of figure out what's going on because you glance up from time to time. Report an error in the passage at 1:29:47 Highlight the passage at 1:29:47

1:30:05 And there was some movie star who had had a suicide attempt. So there's this whole big long thing and the lady next to me was telling me who it was and I still didn't know who it was. But there's this whole thing and they show the girlfriends and the yachts and the this and the that. And he still had a suicide attempt. So it's sort of like... Report an error in the passage at 1:30:05 Highlight the passage at 1:30:05

1:30:22 To me, it's this really deep tragedy of trying so hard. I mean, I know what you get about like that spirit of, you know, bravely trying. But for myself, I think if they could channel that into the Bodhisattva path, like if they could channel all of that incredible energy, if they could only get like a mid-course correction, you know, and instead of channeling it into trying to find samsaric happiness, all of that energy. Report an error in the passage at 1:30:22 Highlight the passage at 1:30:22

1:30:50 Into the courage of being a bodhisattva and saying, I don't care how long it takes, I'll go through anything to liberate beings. I'll gladly be reborn in the deepest hells. Unbelievable. If there would be some way that they could channel that energy into the bodhisattva path. So for me, I guess I have a different kind of perspective. I think from my experience... Report an error in the passage at 1:30:50 Highlight the passage at 1:30:50

1:31:18 As you know, I worked in the hospital, right? So I have real trust that people's lives, the teachings that Buddha was sort of teaching, come through whether they're taught in Buddhist language or not. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, for sure. So I think like people's lives, so even with that effort to try to find happiness, I think it gets corrected by itself. Report an error in the passage at 1:31:18 Highlight the passage at 1:31:18

1:31:41 Yeah. The course gets corrected. Yeah, yeah. Clearly Buddha was like out of his compassion for us, he kind of offered a quicker way to get that correction. Right, right, right. But still, for me, in trying to work with non-Buddhists in a way, I want to also keep it fresh that it's not looking at what people are doing as being, quote, wrong or off, but how to hold the beauty in what they're doing as well. Report an error in the passage at 1:31:41 Highlight the passage at 1:31:41

1:32:14 And then trusting that people's lives will sort of self-correct and that I can maybe be there as a person to mirror back and maybe give a little perspective. And in my own life too, because it's kind of accepting that, yeah, I am broken, right? I am this sort of samsaric being trying to make it work and I, you know, I'm pursuing life, you know. Report an error in the passage at 1:32:14 Highlight the passage at 1:32:14

1:32:43 Just believing potentially that it can work. Right. Right. Right. So it's a subtle line. It is a subtle line. It's a very subtle line. And I certainly don't think that everybody needs to be a Buddhist. I think there are many paths towards happiness. I think... The thing is, for me, when I'm working with people of other faiths or whatever, is sort of changing the perspective from correcting things externally to correcting things more internally. Report an error in the passage at 1:32:43 Highlight the passage at 1:32:43

1:33:13 And however people... Fine, that's effective for them in doing that. I think it's great. I had an experience, I teach at this prison and the chaplain that I work with is a Native American chaplain and he does Native American stuff with the inmates and sweat lodges and drumming circles and all this stuff and he's like totally cool and my new best friend. Report an error in the passage at 1:33:13 Highlight the passage at 1:33:13

1:33:32 We're trying to get the relics into the prison, and so I really needed his help to get permission for the relics in. And I call him on the phone, and I'm like, I don't quite know if he's going to get it, like this relic thing, like is he going to be able to relay it? And I'm explaining, and I'm talking to him. At a certain point, he just got so juiced about it, and he just goes, Tenzin, man, this is going to be awesome. Report an error in the passage at 1:33:32 Highlight the passage at 1:33:32

1:33:55 He goes, you know, medicine is medicine, and I'm just into medicine. I don't care what it is, and I'm going to have all my guys. And I'm kind of that way too, like medicine is medicine, but I think it's like the kind of course correction is more like shifting to internal solutions to lasting happiness rather than all this grasping. Report an error in the passage at 1:33:55 Highlight the passage at 1:33:55

1:34:16 And that's the thing that doesn't work. Like that's the part that doesn't work is just grasping to the outside to try and get it all set up. And if people working on internal methods, then that... No matter what they call it, whatever path that is, that's the medicine. And we can really support that. So whatever you can do to kind of show people. Report an error in the passage at 1:34:16 Highlight the passage at 1:34:16

1:34:39 And sometimes it's just as easy as saying, keep track. When are you happy? I gave a talk to these 7th graders. I was asked to come into the school to talk to the misbehaving 7th graders about compassion. Like talk to 13-year-old boys about, you know, being less self-cherishing, like write, you know. But one of the things that I did for them, I had them do a little meditation. Report an error in the passage at 1:34:39 Highlight the passage at 1:34:39

1:35:03 I go, think of the times in your life that you've been happiest. And then I had them all go around. It was a class of like 20. Not one of them said, when I got the new Game Boy, not one of them said it was about anything material. It was very interesting and I hadn't prompted them. For them, it was all about connection. Everything was like when my older brother comes home from college and we pick him up at the airport, when everybody's, you know, Thanksgiving dinner. Report an error in the passage at 1:35:03 Highlight the passage at 1:35:03

1:35:31 It was all about connection and doing things to make people happy. So when I feel like people are off base, I go, don't listen to Hollywood. Don't listen to Madison Avenue advertising. You check in your own experience, you know, and Lord Buddha said, don't believe my word for it just because I've got this aura. Report an error in the passage at 1:35:31 Highlight the passage at 1:35:31

1:35:51 Golden aura ten feet wide around my body. You check your experience. And I tell people, check when are you happiest? And then go for that. Go for that. Replicate that. Just go back or keep a little journal. Write down when your happiest moments are. Is it really because you bought the new car or is it because you did something nice for somebody else? Report an error in the passage at 1:35:51 Highlight the passage at 1:35:51

1:36:11 So often it's as simple as just checking, which people never do. Okay, one more question, I think because I'm keeping you over a little bit. Which is my usual thing. Thank you very much and thank you for letting me ask your question. I'm wondering, do you have experiences sometimes with a person which you feel... Report an error in the passage at 1:36:11 Highlight the passage at 1:36:11

1:36:35 You just cannot work with them. Not because they challenge you per se, but because they're either so trapped in their way of grasping at things and creating bad things for them over and over and they cannot see it. To such extent that you just lose it. You cannot give them anything. It's rather opposite. Report an error in the passage at 1:36:35 Highlight the passage at 1:36:35

1:37:01 They actually overwhelm you. I get the feeling there may be a specific person. Oh, yeah. No, it is. Yeah, you're absolutely right. There is a specific person. And it's actually a very good girlfriend of mine, which in part has helped me a lot. For me being here, she's a big... But I feel I don't have a strength to help her. Right. Report an error in the passage at 1:37:01 Highlight the passage at 1:37:01

1:37:33 And because of that, I feel guilty in the way that I'm not doing it, but I feel I can't. Well, you know, it's interesting because what comes up for me is something that we are trained as teachers and as monastics that we only will teach if we're requested three times. You know, the energy needs to come from the person to be receptive. Report an error in the passage at 1:37:33 Highlight the passage at 1:37:33

1:37:58 And to be ready. And I think it's a very similar thing in this situation. Not everyone is ready to, you know, be awakened. It's like the energy in the, in the will, in the... The receptivity and the willingness has to come from the side of the person. So you can have a friend in your life, somebody in your life who you feel like is engaging in really dysfunctional behavior and you just can't do anything about it. Report an error in the passage at 1:37:58 Highlight the passage at 1:37:58

1:38:24 And it may not be that you're not strong enough, it just may be that that person isn't ready yet and then it doesn't do any good. You know, how many times have we appreciated it when somebody has told us, oh, you need to break up with that guy, he's no good for you, and we weren't ready for it yet. And then you just get angry. Report an error in the passage at 1:38:24 Highlight the passage at 1:38:24

1:38:41 I mean, sometimes you're just not really ready to have your dysfunctional ways shown to you. I mean, many years of my life, you know, my friends were trying to tell me all the things that I was doing that were creating suffering for me, and I just wasn't ready. So I think part of that wisdom, and it gets back to Ty's question of like, when do you know and how do you help, is just knowing, is that person really ready? Report an error in the passage at 1:38:41 Highlight the passage at 1:38:41

1:39:04 And it really needs to come from their side. And sometimes it'll be amazing. You'll be into Dharma for a long time and your friends all know it and they maybe don't ask you questions. And then, you know, sometimes they'll come to you and say, you know, you do this meditation thing and I'm just struggling right now. And is there anything that you can... Report an error in the passage at 1:39:04 Highlight the passage at 1:39:04

1:39:23 Tell me that would help me deal with what's going on for me. So I think often wisdom, the wisdom to just back off and not to try and do something when to do so would be unskillful because that person's not ready to be helped. And I think that's wisdom too. You know, to be a bodhisattva and to benefit all Cindy Meeks doesn't mean that you have to do what you think, you know, you should tell them what you think that they should do all the time. Report an error in the passage at 1:39:23 Highlight the passage at 1:39:23

1:39:49 Because often it's wisest to just wait. You know, for them to be ready and then the questions start coming from their side when the time is right. And anything else isn't going to really help. Report an error in the passage at 1:39:49 Highlight the passage at 1:39:49

1:40:03 Yeah. Okay. So let's sit for just a minute and practice the last part of what we should do on a daily basis and after every practice session is dedicate the merit. So think of the positive energy. That we've generated from our time together today, thinking about ways we can make every moment of our life into Dharma practice, ways we can bring this, these insights into karma, into renunciation, into our lives. Report an error in the passage at 1:40:03 Highlight the passage at 1:40:03

1:40:46 Incredible, powerful energy and virtue that we've created so that it's not wasted on samsaric happiness. Let's dedicate it, put it in the karmic bank account towards our future enlightenment for the benefit of all beings so that we have all the wisdom, we know exactly what to say, what to do, the most appropriate means to benefit others. Report an error in the passage at 1:40:46 Highlight the passage at 1:40:46

1:41:11 We don't have to guess, we don't have to make mistakes. That's the only reason for becoming a Buddha is to most appropriately benefit others. So just take a minute to dedicate. dedicate energy from our session towards that Thank Report an error in the passage at 1:41:11 Highlight the passage at 1:41:11

· · · silence, 1 minute

1:42:01 you. That was fun. Thank you for your great questions. Report an error in the passage at 1:42:01 Highlight the passage at 1:42:01