Ajahn Viradhammo: Aloneness Loneliness and Interconnectedness - Q and A (1996)

0:00 All right, we can begin, or I can begin. Sit there. Welcome to Amaravati. Nice to be able to see the back row this year. Last year I sat in a chair and I could look at the people in the front, which is all right, but it's nice to see more people. This is a chair that Sister Jyotika made for Ajahn Sumedho some years ago. Report an error in the passage at 0:00 Highlight the passage at 0:00

0:26 Very nice for teaching. Ajahn Sumedho is... He's teaching a retreat for the Thai people in the retreat center. And this Vassa, or this summer, he'll be away quite a bit. He'll be going to Prague in September. He'll be in San Francisco in October. He also has a 10-day retreat in September. So he's asked me to fill in on some of these talks. Report an error in the passage at 0:26 Highlight the passage at 0:26

0:53 So I'll try to offer my reflections on the themes. You're probably wondering how we chose these themes. I was just looking at them this morning, just seeing what I'm... I think the way it worked was a bunch of people got their heads together, put down about 50 titles and Ajahn Sumedho chose nine and I was in Canada. Report an error in the passage at 0:53 Highlight the passage at 0:53

1:22 So I'll try to do my best. But it is a nice challenge actually to be presented with some ideas and then to bring them into the heart and contemplate. Because this is the life of the... the monastic, and hopefully it's your life too, part of your life, the life of contemplation, life of recollection. This is a very important part of the way the Buddha set up the teaching, the ability to take a theme and make it something very deep in your mind and in your heart. Report an error in the passage at 1:22 Highlight the passage at 1:22

1:57 So much of our life is a preoccupation with economics, with politics, with... Email and follow faxes and information and microphone systems. So Report an error in the passage at 1:57 Highlight the passage at 1:57

2:19 to contemplate deeply, you need to have a good microphone. But Report an error in the passage at 2:19 Highlight the passage at 2:19

2:32 it's like the Buddhist teachings has a tremendous number of very helpful things for the spiritual life. And it's the skill or the challenge of the contemplative is to take these at a deeper level than just thought. Report an error in the passage at 2:32 Highlight the passage at 2:32

2:49 Take something like death, to take that really deeply into one's mind that this body will die, to make it something more than just something we all agree upon intellectually, to make it something very deep, or impermanence, or love, or any of these things, to bring it very, very deeply into the heart, creates a kind of, like a mirror, or a screen that we can bounce things off of, that we can reflect. Report an error in the passage at 2:49 Highlight the passage at 2:49

3:21 Our own attitudes of life, our own views and opinions, our own biases and so on. So recollection, contemplation. And that's not just meditating, it's not like a technique. And it's not simply intellectual appreciation of something. It's something we take deeply into our hearts. So when this kind of a theme, what is it, aloneness, loneliness and interconnectedness. Report an error in the passage at 3:21 Highlight the passage at 3:21

3:48 You probably have your own answers to that, I'm sure. So this is not the ultimate definition of those words or those ideas. It's simply one way of perhaps looking at that. I haven't asked Ajahn Sumedho what he thinks about it. That would be cheating, I think. I'll ask him tomorrow, maybe. Well, interconnectedness, this is something in a place like Amaravati becomes very apparent and very obvious in just the way we live as community. Report an error in the passage at 3:48 Highlight the passage at 3:48

4:19 This gathering here, the opportunity to come together like this depends on the people cooking the meal, anagarikas, anagarikas, preparing the food, people offering donations to the monastery, Ajahn Chah, Ajahn Sumedho teaching me that your car has enough petroleum in it. All kinds of things come together to make this possible. We're obviously very interconnected. Report an error in the passage at 4:19 Highlight the passage at 4:19

4:49 And when interconnection is suffused with goodness, with morality, with the love of dharma, then we have something like this. So I think we're very fortunate to be interconnected in this way, that we can sit here in a safe environment, in a beautiful environment, in a peaceful environment and consider dharma. Report an error in the passage at 4:49 Highlight the passage at 4:49

5:13 Interconnectedness when it's immoral, when it's based on seeking power or all kinds of other... Even unfortunate things, and that interconnectedness is obviously Bosnia, Rwanda, places like that. Report an error in the passage at 5:13 Highlight the passage at 5:13

5:28 Ecologically, that's fortunately a popular theme now, the necessity to see that we are a part of nature, we're not the stewards of nature. The old Western view, I think, was that we are somehow the stewards of nature, that we own nature, but we are a part of nature. And when we forget that, we suffer. Report an error in the passage at 5:28 Highlight the passage at 5:28

5:50 Ajahn Sumedho has some quotations of Chief Seattle on his board. He's from Washington. Chief Seattle is from Washington. And this American Indian chief once said that when all the animals in the world are dead, humans will be very lonely. Report an error in the passage at 5:50 Highlight the passage at 5:50

6:08 So here's a response to the development in America. And so it is that our dhamma really is understanding that interconnectedness. Understanding our relationship to nature, to each other, to this planet, to our fellow human beings, and so on and so forth. So that's a very, very important theme. And interconnecting this when it's understood implies a kind of responsibility. In Buddhism we speak a lot about duty, responsibility, responsibility to dharma, to truth. Report an error in the passage at 6:08 Highlight the passage at 6:08

6:43 Because really a Buddhist is one who loves truth, who seeks truth, who seeks to understand clearly the way things are. And when that's understood, then one has to live by that. If I really understand that by harming you or harm myself, by hurting you or hurt myself, then it becomes very apparent that I must live by those principles. Report an error in the passage at 6:43 Highlight the passage at 6:43

7:05 I have to live according to that duty. So we have a duty to that. But interconnectedness also implies a lack of control. Report an error in the passage at 7:05 Highlight the passage at 7:05

7:16 You and I, when... We come together like this. We are dependent on all the factors that make this possible. If the M25 had an accident and you couldn't make it here, you couldn't make it here. If I had a flu and I couldn't talk, then I wouldn't be here. Someone else would be here. So interconnectedness also is something which talks about dependency, that we are dependent on all kinds of factors that come together. Report an error in the passage at 7:16 Highlight the passage at 7:16

7:46 And in that which is dependent, we cannot find freedom. And this is the idea of paticcasamuppada in Buddhism, condition arising, dependent origination. If your freedom, if your happiness or your liberation is dependent on something, then when that changes, then your freedom changes to suffering, to enslavement. Report an error in the passage at 7:46 Highlight the passage at 7:46

8:11 So there's two things, for me at least. That's interconnectedness as a sense of responsibility, but also the danger of interconnectedness, the limitation of interconnectedness. Report an error in the passage at 8:11 Highlight the passage at 8:11

8:22 For me, the Buddha's teaching is pointing to something which is not interconnected, transcendent, ibana. Report an error in the passage at 8:22 Highlight the passage at 8:22

8:32 Loneliness and aloneness. Loneliness, well, we've all experienced that one in greater or lesser ways. I hope no one here hasn't experienced loneliness because it would be a bit strange, wouldn't it, if no one here has experienced loneliness. So that's natural. It's not unnatural to feel lonely. It's a part of nature. Report an error in the passage at 8:32 Highlight the passage at 8:32

8:58 When I consider my own forms of loneliness, losing my first girlfriend, lonely, traveling, I remember times having dysentery in Delhi, being on my own in some cheap hotel, thinking of mom's home cooking, someone dies, and then it's more tragic. I was contemplating loneliness, thinking of the earthquake in Japan, Kobe, and then some orphan kid. Report an error in the passage at 8:58 Highlight the passage at 8:58

9:30 I can't even talk, I guess, in that way. But there are different degrees of loneliness, different intensities of loneliness. And this is natural. This is quite a part of nature. But there are also types of loneliness which come from a wrong way of looking at the world. And they come from... They create this whole sense of separation, alienation, self-consciousness, all kinds of fears. And this kind of loneliness we can address. Report an error in the passage at 9:30 Highlight the passage at 9:30

10:05 We can look at that and we can go beyond that. Aloneness, which implies solitude. Report an error in the passage at 10:05 Highlight the passage at 10:05

10:22 Aloneness is a very interesting word in the Nepali language. The word I took up from that is a word called viveka. You know the monastery called Citta Viveka? Which is Chithurst, yes? Our other monastery in West Sussex. Chitta Viveka. Viveka means solitude. Monks or nuns will say, like, I'm going Vivek, which is a sort of English Pāli way of saying I'm going off in solitude. Report an error in the passage at 10:22 Highlight the passage at 10:22

10:50 Viveka. So that's the idea of retreat, of being a hermit, those kinds of ideas. But that's called Kaya Viveka. It's the solitude or serenity of the body. Report an error in the passage at 10:50 Highlight the passage at 10:50

11:05 But citta viveka is the solitude of the heart. And Ajahn Sumedho, if I remember correctly, named it that way because we'd been living in London two years and he realized this is a crowded country. We're not going to find kaya viveka. We're going to be with people all the time. Let's call this place citta viveka, serenity of the heart. That you discover in meditation. Report an error in the passage at 11:05 Highlight the passage at 11:05

11:30 I have. Just sitting here, say. Just sitting here for a few minutes and settling the heart and settling the mind. I think one finds a kind of solitude which isn't lonely, an aloneness which is with people, but in some ways is very serene, very calm. Jitta viveka. We often refer to the meditative stillness of the mind. Another kind of viveka is upadhi viveka, which is... Report an error in the passage at 11:30 Highlight the passage at 11:30

12:05 It has to do more with renunciation and detachment when we're not attached to the world, when the world no longer grabs us. It's another way of talking about nibbāna or liberation, upadhi viveka. Report an error in the passage at 12:05 Highlight the passage at 12:05

12:23 So kaya viveka is something that the Buddha encouraged, and I certainly have enjoyed it myself. I was just in New Zealand, which is a very empty country. On, say, the west coast of New Zealand, which is probably a thousand kilometers, west coast of South Island, a thousand kilometers long, half of which has a road, the other half doesn't, there are 40,000 people. Report an error in the passage at 12:23 Highlight the passage at 12:23

12:52 So that's from here to Newcastle or something? 40,000 people. I think there's two meters of rain too, but not very many people live there. It's difficult to live there, but I think not many people want to be hermits. I think we're social beings. We like to live with each other. So there is the love of wilderness and there's a love of solitude that we all have. Report an error in the passage at 12:52 Highlight the passage at 12:52

13:19 But how many people actually live like that? How many people live a kind of hermit life? It doesn't seem to be that many, even among monks and nuns. So Kaya Viveka is very refreshing. Being in wilderness is very refreshing. I come from Canada. I did some canoeing recently. It was lovely. I was floating down a river. Report an error in the passage at 13:19 Highlight the passage at 13:19

13:40 Watching the kingfishers and doing nothing much and just paddling in the water, very refreshing. But jitta viveka, jitta viveka is something which requires some skill, requires some work. And then this upadhi viveka, this liberation of the heart, is something that we can be in all situations and be free. Report an error in the passage at 13:40 Highlight the passage at 13:40

14:04 Really complex or simple, be canoeing down the river or being in London. This is the liberation of the heart. Loneliness and aloneness then are not necessarily synonymous. You can be alone in London and feel very lonely. Big city, lots of people, but no one to talk to. And one can feel very lonely. But if you've got a lot of people around you and you've got a lot to do, then one can really yearn to be alone. Report an error in the passage at 14:04 Highlight the passage at 14:04

14:33 So they kind of aren't necessarily synonymous. But if we link all this together, interdependence or interconnectedness and aloneness, how do you do that then? Because I'm sitting here and I feel you and you feel me in some way. Report an error in the passage at 14:33 Highlight the passage at 14:33

14:53 We are connected in some way. We feel this place. We feel each other. We feel our histories. We feel our bodies. So there is this interconnectedness. So what is aloneness within that? Aloneness which isn't lonely. An aloneness which is free, which is radiant. And I think that aloneness comes only from love, really. Report an error in the passage at 14:53 Highlight the passage at 14:53

15:21 Because the way I was contemplating, this interconnectedness that we have, that we're a part of, implies what? Implies a certain amount of pleasantness and a certain amount of discomfort between people, in my own body, in the environment. So I've been struggling with a bug. in my throat and dreading the thought my throat is going to pack in for this talk I'm interconnected to that to the body Report an error in the passage at 15:21 Highlight the passage at 15:21

15:52 That's a part of my life. How can I stand in that place of aloneness which is non-suffering, which is still, which is not dependent? How can I stand there? I can only stand there with love, I think. Not love, of course, in the sense of liking. But rather love in the sense of accepting. Because if I can accept that cough, simple thing, the flu, if I can accept that and be with that, which is unpleasant and uncomfortable and creates a certain amount of worry, will I be able to give the talk and so on and so forth. Report an error in the passage at 15:52 Highlight the passage at 15:52

16:28 It's not a big thing, but it's there. If I can accept that, then I stand still with the cough. There is a stillness. There is an independence of the cough. There is still interconnectedness. But because there is the... If perhaps love is too strong a word, but what word do we use? There is a sense of benevolence with the call. There's a sense of kindness, a sense of acceptance or mindfulness. Report an error in the passage at 16:28 Highlight the passage at 16:28

16:51 And mindfulness and love, I think, are conjoined. Then there's that ability to stand alone in freedom, not in attachment, not in suffering. Report an error in the passage at 16:51 Highlight the passage at 16:51

17:05 Loneliness is the same way. If I can stand with loneliness, if I can take the feeling of loneliness into my heart, And I've certainly experienced it. And love that loneliness or be aware of that loneliness or accept that loneliness or welcome that loneliness. If I can be with it in that way, then what happens? Then my heart broadens, it spreads to include something which is very difficult to include into consciousness, the feeling of loneliness. Report an error in the passage at 17:05 Highlight the passage at 17:05

17:37 And there I can find a sense of standing still with loneliness. Then the loneliness doesn't become neurotic. It doesn't become a problem. It's another force in nature which is alright, which is possible to bear. Report an error in the passage at 17:37 Highlight the passage at 17:37

17:54 Monastic life, our loneliness quite often comes because we live celibate life and most monastics, I should think, yearn for the companionship of a man or a woman, intimacy. Those are very real things in monastic life. And of course, course, one. One romanticizes that in monastic life. You're away for a while, it looks maybe very good. There's a very real kind of loneliness that can come up in monastic life. Report an error in the passage at 17:54 Highlight the passage at 17:54

18:25 Then, of course, the yearning to get out of that, the yearning to escape from that loneliness, then there's the projection onto other people of where one's fulfillment will be in the outer, in the interconnectedness. That's where I'll find my fulfillment, with a person, with another. But does that really work? It works for a while, maybe. Report an error in the passage at 18:25 Highlight the passage at 18:25

18:45 But then if the person dies, or if the person doesn't quite fit the bill, isn't the kind of spiritual athlete one hoped for, etc., etc., then of course there's disappointment. And there's the sense of being betrayed by this interconnectedness, or there's the despair, and there's the increase in loneliness, increase in despair. Report an error in the passage at 18:45 Highlight the passage at 18:45

19:10 And why is that? We would say, well, because one was seeking... One's solitude or one's refuge in their own place. One was seeking in interconnectedness something which interconnectedness can never give us permanently. So there can be joy in relationship. There can be the beauty of love and sharing and so on. But it's not a refuge. Report an error in the passage at 19:10 Highlight the passage at 19:10

19:35 It's not where we can really stand strongly. And in fact, when we look at interconnectedness in this way of grasping, An attachment and trying to get something out of it, then of course it leads to the opposite, to jealousy, to fear of loss, to anger. And that beauty, which is the love of another, becomes corrupted, becomes in some way ugly, can become ugly, which is sad, but which happens. Report an error in the passage at 19:35 Highlight the passage at 19:35

20:06 So when our hearts open in some way, what we try to ponder is not the person, but the opening of the heart. When my heart opens to a child in some way and I feel very open and connected with the child, what is that? What is that sense of love which is not dependent? It's not demanding anything from the child. It's something which is very pure, that kind of openness. And we've all tasted that at times. Report an error in the passage at 20:06 Highlight the passage at 20:06

20:35 Hopefully, yeah, a little bit. At times it comes and goes. And it's obviously very beautiful. We all yearn for that. And how to get there then? How to realize that more than just a chance affair or a chance circumstance, something which is really solid in the heart, something that comes from wisdom, from understanding rather than from circumstance. Report an error in the passage at 20:35 Highlight the passage at 20:35

21:02 How do we go to that? And that's very much part of my goal. When I contemplate the Buddha's teachings around liberation, very much it's a liberation of the heart. I ponder that a lot, not just some kind of cerebral intellectual understanding which has no warmth in it, but actually very much related with the heart. Report an error in the passage at 21:02 Highlight the passage at 21:02

21:28 Well, the way I think the Buddha offers for understanding this aloneness which is very warm and very loving is through It's through bringing deeply into the mind the very feeling of love. You know, if I take something like, you know, we have this practice around mettā or the Brahma, the horrors, the divine abidings. Report an error in the passage at 21:28 Highlight the passage at 21:28

21:58 If I take something deeply into my heart, something like, may I be well, may all beings be well. And I do that a lot. And recollection is something you have to do a lot. It's not just a little technique, but you have to somehow, we have to somehow bring it into our hearts and minds so that becomes a very strong, Resonance, a very strong inner voice. And what happens if I do that, if I do that? Every day I do that a lot. I recollect, I recollect, I recollect. May I be well, may you be well. Report an error in the passage at 21:58 Highlight the passage at 21:58

22:28 Then when alienation comes up in the ways of possessiveness or the ways of anger or the ways of fear, that recollection is a contrast to the very feeling of alienation. Report an error in the passage at 22:28 Highlight the passage at 22:28

22:43 It's like a light which shines on it. If I think about you and I think, may you be free from suffering, and then you drop a glass on the carpet and I say, you idiot, why did you drop it? If I've been thinking, may you be free from suffering, as soon as you drop that glass and I think you're an idiot, I say, hey, wait a minute, what's that? Report an error in the passage at 22:43 Highlight the passage at 22:43

23:02 So the recollection reflects back for me that feeling of alienation, anger, fear, whatever it is. And then, if within that reflecting back, I can then... Be aware in a loving way of that very feeling of aversion or annoyance or fear. What have I done? I've opened my heart to include even someone dropping a glass on a marabati carpet or being nervous and giving a talk or whatever it might be. Report an error in the passage at 23:02 Highlight the passage at 23:02

23:33 I've taken that feeling of alienation that arises in interconnectedness and I've allowed that to be there. And in allowing that to be there, there's no exclusion. It's all, I've allowed it all to be there. And that's standing firm. I haven't bought into the alienation. I haven't believed in it as anything permanent. Report an error in the passage at 23:33 Highlight the passage at 23:33

23:56 I've allowed it to be there. And then it ceases. Then it runs its course. And what stays? What is it that stays there? What is it that holds its ground? What is this aloneness? It's very beautiful because it can take all things. The image I've often used is the image of the empty mirror. In the Taoist teaching, that the empty mirror... Report an error in the passage at 23:56 Highlight the passage at 23:56

24:16 Except it receives all things, reflects them back, doesn't hold on to any. So you walk in front of the mirror, the mirror picks up the image, you walk away, the image goes away. It's all right. Whatever the image is, whether it's monsters or angels, it doesn't really matter. And that openness of the heart, it has to be a loving thing. Report an error in the passage at 24:16 Highlight the passage at 24:16

24:40 For me, it's the only way it could possibly work. Because of the fact that our senses, we are sense beings, we live in a sense world which is plus and minus, positive, negative, comfortable, uncomfortable. It's that way. So the energies of fear and desire, those energies, they're the ones that are the complexity. They're always complicating this interconnectedness with preference. Report an error in the passage at 24:40 Highlight the passage at 24:40

25:06 I want comfort. I want you. I don't want you. I want this person, I don't want that person. I want you to be just, I want you to be fair. I want you to like what I say. I should be this way, I shouldn't be that way. I should have this, I shouldn't have that. It goes on and on. That's very complex. But love and knowing and mindfulness is very simple. Report an error in the passage at 25:06 Highlight the passage at 25:06

25:28 It's very simple. This is the way it is now, in a loving way. The images of Kaya Viveka, the serenity of the body, walking on the beach in Northumberland. Report an error in the passage at 25:28 Highlight the passage at 25:28

25:41 Walking in South Island in New Zealand. It's a very simple image. When you live on your own, in many ways it's very simple, isn't it? It's a very simple kind of thing. When you get two people, it gets a bit more complex. You get 50 people. So this is a wonderful place that we can actually live together here, 50 people. Report an error in the passage at 25:41 Highlight the passage at 25:41

26:02 And all of us are very opinionated. And all of us are very clever. It's very complex, isn't it? It's very complex. Report an error in the passage at 26:02 Highlight the passage at 26:02

26:13 Jitta viveka and upadhi viveka is the kind of ultimate in simplicity too. And because this interconnectedness is polar, how could this be other than love? How else could you operate in a way of non-suffering? Because as soon as I start to choose and prefer, fear and desire get in there and make it very complicated. Report an error in the passage at 26:13 Highlight the passage at 26:13

26:40 So this sense of the Buddhist practice then is this way of opening Report an error in the passage at 26:40 Highlight the passage at 26:40

26:48 Reflecting on the way things are rather than becoming. That's a relief. In this way you don't have to become anything. You have to bear a lot. Report an error in the passage at 26:48 Highlight the passage at 26:48

27:00 You really have to hang in with this practice, don't you? Because when the heart starts to feel lonely, say if we're talking about loneliness, what the desire mind, it doesn't want that. Why? Because it's very uncomfortable. It's unpleasant. It's lonely. And so the desire mind gets in there. With some kind of a program of becoming. But to stand alone with that, with that loneliness, is to watch that loneliness cease into the silence of the mind. Report an error in the passage at 27:00 Highlight the passage at 27:00

27:30 It might take a while. So when my father died, my mother was married to my dad for 40 years. That's a profound kind of loneliness. And so two years of images. She'd walk into the dining room, their dad would be sitting at the table. These are really strong images. So the more we are defined, the more we define ourselves in this interconnectedness, when we lose things, then we feel profound loneliness. Report an error in the passage at 27:30 Highlight the passage at 27:30

28:06 Mothers and fathers, when their kids leave home, quite often feel very lonely. Even though the week before they said, oh, I'll be glad when these guys are gone. Somehow when they are gone, many of them, I mean, I've not had kids. profound loneliness. Report an error in the passage at 28:06 Highlight the passage at 28:06

28:21 But many I've talked to feel the house is very empty. It's very quiet. They're very lonely. Not necessarily. And so this is just part of our predicament. My own experience of loneliness, if I... Like I remember in Thailand, I was once listening to one of Ajahn Chah's endless discourses. He used to give these long discourses which we always joke about. And, you know, it was one of the three-hour ones and I was... Report an error in the passage at 28:21 Highlight the passage at 28:21

28:49 Sitting on a concrete floor and there were no cushions and my knees were killing me and the language was Thai. Actually it was Lao, which was even more difficult because I had a book on how to learn Thai. Report an error in the passage at 28:49 Highlight the passage at 28:49

29:04 But after about 10-15 minutes my concentration would go and I'd be looking at the clock and thinking, come on, I want to meditate. And I remember this one... One evening he was really going strong and I could see the other monks were actually quite interested. And he cracked some kind of a joke and everyone broke up. Report an error in the passage at 29:04 Highlight the passage at 29:04

29:26 I think I was the only westerner in the hall. And everyone laughed and I felt so lonely. Because not only was this killing me physically, but everyone was enjoying it. And I couldn't plug in. It was this incredible feeling of loneliness. And yet everything around me was very loving. Report an error in the passage at 29:26 Highlight the passage at 29:26

29:48 Thai people were wonderful, Northeast Thailand, beautiful faith, you know, they supported me. This Westerner just comes in, they say, oh great, you're going to be a monk, how can we help you? So everything was loving and caring, but I felt very, very lonely, which is natural, being homesick and so on. And what to do with that? Report an error in the passage at 29:48 Highlight the passage at 29:48

30:06 Well, the first thing you want to do is run for it, of course, or find a Westerner to talk to or something. But there was no option, it was just that. And I'm really grateful for that, that I had no option but just to be lonely. And then to say, well, what is that? What is that as a feeling? What is that to really investigate something like the feeling of loneliness? And then sitting through that, and I think those early years in Thailand, I did, I had a lot of loneliness. Report an error in the passage at 30:06 Highlight the passage at 30:06

30:31 So I traveled for three years before I became a monk, and kind of just traveled on my own most of the time, living in India and such like. And many a time, you kind of think, what am I doing? I don't know anyone, foreign country, I don't even like the food. Report an error in the passage at 30:31 Highlight the passage at 30:31

30:48 And these kinds of feelings of loneliness. But from that, there's obviously tremendous strength possible. Because one sense of strength is no longer dependent on culture, on the other, on another being, on a situation. But it's rather something which is very inner. So loneliness is not a bad thing. Now that doesn't mean that we don't need to take care of people who are lonely. Report an error in the passage at 30:48 Highlight the passage at 30:48

31:17 Because loneliness is a difficult thing. And of course, loneliness leads to depression. People get very, very depressed. And once they start to get very depressed, they think depressing thoughts and they go in a downward spiral. So the skill of the contemplative around feelings of loneliness is no longer to think about it, but to actually integrate it into the heart in a loving way, to take it into the heart. Report an error in the passage at 31:17 Highlight the passage at 31:17

31:42 Because the thinking mind is always that which separates us. Thinking about loneliness is not the same as actually feeling it in an existential way. It's a comment on it. We're not commenting on loneliness. We're not saying it's good or bad. We're saying this is the way it is now. And that sense of integration and bringing it in is very, very healing and has a chance to allow it to cease. Report an error in the passage at 31:42 Highlight the passage at 31:42

32:11 In terms of viveka, in the sense of the serenity of the heart, There are ways of making the heart serene or have some strength or freedom in very momentary ways. So we can do very distracting things. So if I feel lonely, I can distract for a while. But it's like taking a ball, shoving it down in the water, take your hands off, the ball pops up again. Report an error in the passage at 32:11 Highlight the passage at 32:11

32:43 So it's not really liberating. It's kind of... Situational high. You just avoided it for a while. And you can do this in meditation too. Some people can get very absorbed in meditation. And this is like on a 10-day retreat. People often find they'll have a retreat. The first three days they'll suffer like hell. Report an error in the passage at 32:43 Highlight the passage at 32:43

33:07 And then the fourth day they'll start to think, this is almost worth it. And then the tenth day they don't want to leave. And they get very kind of high and blissed out and peaceful. And then they'll go back home and then it'll all start up again. The fear and the resentment and then it'll all come back again. And so people think, oh, well, I've lost something. Report an error in the passage at 33:07 Highlight the passage at 33:07

33:27 I've blown it. But the image there that's given in the text, it's like you take a plant and you cut it at the stem, but the roots are still there. And eventually the roots will start to grow again and the plant's there again. So meditation in itself, meditation in the sense of just... Applying a technique to the mind and subduing the defilements of the mind, just doing that all the time, that's not sufficient. What that is good for is to create contrast. Report an error in the passage at 33:27 Highlight the passage at 33:27

33:58 Very good to create contrast. If I do some meditation and I find some stillness in the mind, then when interconnectedness brings up anger or fear or resentment or loneliness, then that serenity, that jitta viveka, shows me very clearly what's happening. If I have no meditative stillness, then I often don't have a contrast and I'm just in a kind of muddle of reactiveness where I react from one thing to another. Report an error in the passage at 33:58 Highlight the passage at 33:58

34:25 But I don't really see the nature of the confusion or the loneliness. So meditation has a power, but it's not an end in itself. Report an error in the passage at 34:25 Highlight the passage at 34:25

34:35 And I've certainly seen that in monastics where monastics will apply a lot of willpower to a technique. And will make the mind very, very calm and be successful in that way. But as soon as the circumstances of interconnectedness change in a way where it's out of their control, all the old habits start to bubble up and they think something is wrong. Report an error in the passage at 34:35 Highlight the passage at 34:35

34:58 They've lost something. But in the way of aloneness, which is not dependent, you cannot lose anything. If the heart is very open with the way things are in this loving way, what can you lose? Report an error in the passage at 34:58 Highlight the passage at 34:58

35:14 And there's nothing to gain. It's not a position you have to defend. It's a way of being. But as soon as there is a position or a preference, or as there is some control mechanism that helps me to have a kind of serene inner environment, then as soon as the control is gone, it changes, then I change with it and I suffer. Report an error in the passage at 35:14 Highlight the passage at 35:14

35:41 So the teaching around interconnectedness then talks about... Dependent origination. And as long as anything depends on something else, you can't rely on it. And that's the thrust, I think, for me, the teaching of dependent origination. As long as this feeling of happiness that I have now is dependent on the nice climate, say, then that feeling of happiness is not aloneness. Report an error in the passage at 35:41 Highlight the passage at 35:41

36:08 It's not the true refuge. Because it will change when those circumstances change. So the Buddhist teaching of dependent origination is not just the kind of... appreciation of life. It's just saying that anything that's dependent cannot be the spiritual goal. Anything which is dependent subject to The search is for the independent, for that which is not subject to the forces of change. Report an error in the passage at 36:08 Highlight the passage at 36:08

36:41 The image I perhaps just leave you with... The image of aloneness, which quite often comes to my mind, is the image of the island. So Venerable Asaji helped me look it up in the text. Report an error in the passage at 36:41 Highlight the passage at 36:41

37:02 He's a wonderful resource, Venerable Asaji. Report an error in the passage at 37:02 Highlight the passage at 37:02

37:08 So maybe I could just leave you with these ideas around the island, around aloneness. There is an island, an island which you cannot go beyond. It is a place of nothingness, a place of nothingness. A place of non-possession, of non-attachment. It is the total end of death and decay, and this is why it is called Nibbāna. Report an error in the passage at 37:08 Highlight the passage at 37:08

37:34 So for me, when I read that, I think, if the heart is open, what is born and decaying are this interdependence, this flow of life. It's changing. And if there is a response from this being, from love, then the birth and decay don't affect one. It's just birth and decay, change coming and going. But if the response comes from grasping, then I'm pulled by these things. Report an error in the passage at 37:34 Highlight the passage at 37:34

38:04 I'm pulled into birth and death, birth and death. Again, there is an island, an island which you cannot go beyond. It is a place of nothingness, a place of non-possession and of non-attachment. It is the total end of death and decay. And this is why it is called Nibbāna. And then we were looking up, there was another reference. Report an error in the passage at 38:04 Highlight the passage at 38:04

38:26 which I couldn't remember and Venerable Asaji helped me, which has the island in it. And these are ways that the kind of correlated ideas to this aloneness and freedom, the way that it's placed in the text. I will teach you the end, brethren, and the path that goes to the end. Do you listen to it? And what, brethren, is the end? And then it goes through many suttas in the same way. Report an error in the passage at 38:26 Highlight the passage at 38:26

38:52 The truth, free from the defilements, free from the asavas. The further shore, the subtle, the hard to see, the unfading, the stable, the undecaying, the invisible, the taintless, the peace, the deathless, the excellent, the blissful, the security, the destruction of craving, the wonderful, the marvelous, the free from ill, nibbāna, the harmless, dispassion, purity, release. Report an error in the passage at 38:52 Highlight the passage at 38:52

39:26 Non-attachment, the island, the cave, the stronghold, the refuge, the goal and the path. That's a mouthful. But I really enjoy just kind of reading that. And this is, I think, the art of recollection. Is that a good word? Just the way of recollection. You take something like that and just bring it really deeply into the heart. So that becomes a kind of resonance in the mind rather than the resonance of... Report an error in the passage at 39:26 Highlight the passage at 39:26

39:57 Labor party, whatever. That's all right. But when you bring dharma into the heart in this kind of way of recollection, Report an error in the passage at 39:57 Highlight the passage at 39:57

40:12 there's another teacher who is not a Buddhist who many of us here like, and I'll close with one from him. Because this island is about knowing. It's not so much a place. It's a way of being, isn't it? Knowing with the sense of love in it, isn't it? Report an error in the passage at 40:12 Highlight the passage at 40:12

40:30 So then, that's why I've always very much loved Ajahn Sumedho's way of teaching, this kind of direct way of saying, now is the knowing. I found that incredibly helpful. Report an error in the passage at 40:30 Highlight the passage at 40:30

40:41 And in our interconnectedness, we have to be very grateful for him that we're here. But anyway, this is a teacher called Nisargadatta. Report an error in the passage at 40:41 Highlight the passage at 40:41

40:51 The knower comes and goes, and this would be like a koan, I won't leave it for you, sorry. The knower comes and goes with the known, and is transient. But that which knows that it does not know, which is free of memory and anticipation, is timeless. I'll give it one more time. The knower comes and goes with the known and is transient. But that which knows that it does not know, which is free of memory and anticipation, is timeless. Report an error in the passage at 40:51 Highlight the passage at 40:51

41:22 Okay, I'll leave it there. Report an error in the passage at 41:22 Highlight the passage at 41:22

41:27 Take a break for tea. Questions afterwards if anyone wants. And we're interconnected to Lada who's making the tea. Report an error in the passage at 41:27 Highlight the passage at 41:27

41:45 Yes, Report an error in the passage at 41:45 Highlight the passage at 41:45

42:02 in the back. It comes Report an error in the passage at 42:02 Highlight the passage at 42:02

42:12 from our own minds. Report an error in the passage at 42:12 Highlight the passage at 42:12

42:17 It's conditioned by certain things. So, like Report an error in the passage at 42:17 Highlight the passage at 42:17

42:27 I could maybe feel something from someone else. Let's say I felt someone was afraid of me, say. Someone is angry at me. And they put out that kind of energy. Then I would feel that and then I might start thinking in that way. Report an error in the passage at 42:27 Highlight the passage at 42:27

42:50 Where's your question coming from? I'm not quite sure. Report an error in the passage at 42:50 Highlight the passage at 42:50

43:03 Oh yeah, all thought doesn't have to be from the sense of self. They can arise spontaneously. Sure, yes. And those thoughts can be very edifying, insightful thoughts. Yes, definitely. In terms of thought, we have a word in Nepali which is papancha. And the image which I always use a lot and some of you have heard is in the Thai language they have... Report an error in the passage at 43:03 Highlight the passage at 43:03

43:35 They have a word, prung dang, and prung means to season. So if you have a lot of veggies and some tofu and such like, you stir it together and you season it. You prung it, prung, to season. And then dang, dang tu is when someone's going out in the town, they dress up and do up this and do up that, things I haven't done for a while. Report an error in the passage at 43:35 Highlight the passage at 43:35

44:00 Dangto means you kind of get dressed up. So prungdang is seasoning and dressing up. So the kind of thought which is unskillful is prungdanging thought or mental proliferation. So I feel like in terms of loneliness, I feel the sense of loneliness arises and then I begin to think. The thoughts are constructs which are coming on top of the prungdanging, say, the feeling of loneliness. Report an error in the passage at 44:00 Highlight the passage at 44:00

44:26 And that's unskillful. But thought can be skillful, it can be planning thought, or it can be some spontaneous arising of insight. So there's many aspects of thought. Anyone else, anything? Report an error in the passage at 44:26 Highlight the passage at 44:26

44:45 Emptiness, I think. Well, not nothing, but a mind which is empty of self-grasping. So the way I look at it is a kind of space or freedom or opportunity in consciousness which can manifest. With spontaneity or with intuition, when it is not preoccupied with fear and desire. But as long as the mind is filled with fear and desire in all its ego ways, then there's no space there. Report an error in the passage at 44:45 Highlight the passage at 44:45

45:17 There's no chance for true creativity. It's just the dead repetition of old habits and patterns. So emptiness is not nothingness for us. It's words, huh? It's difficult with words, but it's a sense of a vibrant presence. A sense of being in the mind which isn't preoccupied with fear and desire. And then intuition, creativity, spontaneity would arise from that. Report an error in the passage at 45:17 Highlight the passage at 45:17

45:44 And then interconnectedness, this mind-body, the way it operates in that is through a response rather than a reaction. A response which is appropriate rather than a reaction which is from dead habits and so on. Report an error in the passage at 45:44 Highlight the passage at 45:44

46:01 That's when I see it. Report an error in the passage at 46:01 Highlight the passage at 46:01

46:08 Yes. Report an error in the passage at 46:08 Highlight the passage at 46:08

46:13 Uh-huh. Report an error in the passage at 46:13 Highlight the passage at 46:13

46:17 Upadhi Viveka. Report an error in the passage at 46:17 Highlight the passage at 46:17

46:30 Well, I wish Venerable Asaji was here, because I'm not a Pāli scholar, so forgive me, Morris or Frida, whoever are the Pāli scholars. Report an error in the passage at 46:30 Highlight the passage at 46:30

46:42 I think, like, for me, citta viveka is that serenity of the mind, which can be cultivated, right? But if that serenity is unstable, then what manifests is, of course, attachment, right? And then... The attachments in terms of greed, hatred, delusion, fear, all those different kinds of things are what shake the mind, which take you away from samasamati, say. Report an error in the passage at 46:42 Highlight the passage at 46:42

47:12 So then if there is jitta viveka, if there is some samati, then with the shaking of the mind, if there is the ability to hold steady and observe that shaking, be that shaking anxiety or be that shaking anger or be it worry, but one can know that. So that maybe the mind doesn't have the kind of serenity, but it's still the knowing is very strong. Then by bearing with that shaking, then the attachment tends to cease and you have upadhi viveka. Report an error in the passage at 47:12 Highlight the passage at 47:12

47:41 Because, you know, the idea of cessation is very important in Buddhism. So by being with the shaking that comes from attachment and sitting and knowing, Then there is no grasping, there is no feeding, there is no nourishment of that and the reasons for that arising again begin to die. Report an error in the passage at 47:41 Highlight the passage at 47:41

48:04 And much of our life is around that idea of cessation where we in this interconnectedness we encounter life in various ways and then lo and behold something is thrown up into consciousness which we might not have seen before, might not have worked before. And that's kind of the idea of purification, working out your karma. And I find, in terms of that, not to set up a kind of linear progressive program of enlightenment. Report an error in the passage at 48:04 Highlight the passage at 48:04

48:34 In other words, when I began, I thought things would get better and better. They've often got worse and worse. So I found to put away all the ideas of how it should be and just take one step at a time, and that if the heart does shake, Very strongly for some reason and it gets overwhelmed. I don't see that as bad anymore. I see more and more the opportunity to work out karma. Report an error in the passage at 48:34 Highlight the passage at 48:34

49:00 And then upadhi viveka is that sense of things ceasing and then they just don't come up again. It's not like there is a need to do a technique to make the heart tranquil, but the heart is freed. It's liberated. The asavas have ceased. The defilements have ceased. Report an error in the passage at 49:00 Highlight the passage at 49:00

49:18 So to really take this idea of cessation, and that's where something like loneliness is difficult, because to, at least in my experience of it, when the loneliness comes, to bear with it, first of all, to not run away with the first woman I saw, not to believe in that trip, not to blame the abbot, I think he's cruel for keeping me here, not to blame myself, you know, all the different escapes, but just to be lonely, to feel it fully. Report an error in the passage at 49:18 Highlight the passage at 49:18

49:48 Not with thought, but with feeling. And to bear with that takes a lot of trust. And this is the difficult part, I think, of the practice, to bear with unfulfilled desire, because the whole desire pattern is saying, do something about this, get rid of this, or become something. And that's where you really have to have strong refuge. You have to have strong refuge in Buddha, Dhamma, Saṅgha. Because that's what carries you through those dark bits which seem unacceptable or too difficult. Report an error in the passage at 49:48 Highlight the passage at 49:48

50:18 And so it's a trust which takes you beyond the rational mind. The rational mind is always giving the reasons why one should run away or do something to distract the mind. But the faith mind says this has the nature to arise, has the nature to cease. It's that kind of trust and faith to be with that. Then these seemingly unbearable things do cease. Because the thing about desire is it has its nice points, doesn't it? Report an error in the passage at 50:18 Highlight the passage at 50:18

50:48 It does feel nice to get away from these things. That's why we do it. So in terms of dharma, we contemplate the dissatisfaction, the danger, the escape. It's not that moving away from something like loneliness isn't nice. It is nice. And it can be helpful, you know, if I'm getting really depressed and someone picks me up, great. Report an error in the passage at 50:48 Highlight the passage at 50:48

51:11 But as an ultimate strategy, it can just lead to the cyclic. The recycling of those habits again and again and again. So Buddhists aren't into recycling. We're into cessation. Report an error in the passage at 51:11 Highlight the passage at 51:11

51:29 Two Report an error in the passage at 51:29 Highlight the passage at 51:29

· · · silence, 1 minute

52:05 things. Report an error in the passage at 52:05 Highlight the passage at 52:05

52:16 One is that one tries to move away from the object of the anger and begins to just see anger as a fundamental energy. So whether I'm angry at my brother, my sister, myself, or the cat, it's anger. It's all the same. So you're trying to get beyond just the superficial manifestation to something more deep. Report an error in the passage at 52:16 Highlight the passage at 52:16

52:41 This is aversion. That actual feeling. So that's one thing. It doesn't really matter. And no matter how justified it seems, it's still anger. And the second thing is then again to take a deep recollection of mettā practice. May I be free from suffering. And to do that throughout the day, and to do that very, very consistently and solidly, even if it doesn't feel like much. Even if it's just, oh, just parrot stuff. Report an error in the passage at 52:41 Highlight the passage at 52:41

53:09 You just keep bringing Report an error in the passage at 53:09 Highlight the passage at 53:09

53:21 it into consciousness. And that's the trouble, you know, when you start doing mettā practice, it seems so cerebral. Or smarmy, you know, if you're a cynic like me and you're fierce to your... But, Report an error in the passage at 53:21 Highlight the passage at 53:21

53:36 so like you really... To deepen it, you have to keep pondering it, pondering it, pondering it, bringing it to consciousness. And then it's just this kind of resonance in your heart so that when there is self-dispersion or dispersion of others, there's this incredible contrast. And you see that's the one. So you're saying, you're getting angry. Yeah, but I just said I should be happy. What's happening? You see the contrast. Report an error in the passage at 53:36 Highlight the passage at 53:36

53:59 So around that first point about the object of defilement, that's very important. Otherwise, we never get deeper than thought. So whatever I'm afraid of, whatever I'm worried about, whatever I'm greedy for, that doesn't matter. It's that basic energy of discontent which I want to get in touch with. Report an error in the passage at 53:59 Highlight the passage at 53:59

54:19 So what I do with self-disparagement, the habit mind will come up, oh, you didn't do that right. Say, yeah, yeah, you're an idiot, but I love you. I just play along with it. Because it's so easy to say, you should have love and kindness for yourself, which is still aversion. So just play with it like that. Report an error in the passage at 54:19 Highlight the passage at 54:19

54:41 Anything else? Report an error in the passage at 54:41 Highlight the passage at 54:41

· · · silence, 1 minute

55:12 Well, it depends how strongly it comes into consciousness, right? So say, let's Report an error in the passage at 55:12 Highlight the passage at 55:12

55:23 say if I had an appointment with you in the office at 3 o 'clock and I changed all my diaries to be there. I go there and then you don't come. Then maybe I'm really... But maybe if someone killed my father, the anger would be stronger. So first of all, there's intensity of aversion. That depends. And that intensity then depends on how my being is involved with the loss or the insult or whatever. So then the more deeply I'm hit that way, the more that's going to echo in the mind. Report an error in the passage at 55:23 Highlight the passage at 55:23

56:07 So the only real thing for me is to not believe in the thoughts but go to the feeling. And so if it's rage, okay, it's rage and that's going to last a while. And the thinking mind will go into resentment or revenge or self-disparagement. Not to believe that, to go back to that. But often it's just a soap bubble. You know, one feels annoyed and just look at it and it's gone. Report an error in the passage at 56:07 Highlight the passage at 56:07

56:32 It's just a soap bubble. But sometimes it's a volcano. And often the volcanoes come because they connect you to ways that I think the ego has manifested in the past. You know, they kind of plug into some past experience or some way that the whole psych's formed. And they're actually very, very valuable. If you can hold them in mindfulness, there's some part of the whole ego structure dies that way. If you can just bear with it and have the trust that this will change. Report an error in the passage at 56:32 Highlight the passage at 56:32

57:01 And there's a tremendous peace that comes from that. And that's the peace of cessation. So it's not bad. It's not wrong. So it just depends on the intensity. Report an error in the passage at 57:01 Highlight the passage at 57:01

57:18 And like in terms of like if one has a lot of different kinds of angers, just say, may I be free from anger. You're feeling the anger. You're feeling, may I be free from anger. You're still recognizing the anger, but you're not saying, you idiot, you're dumb or you're angry. I shouldn't be angry because that's aversion, but you're saying you're having compassion for this feeling of anger. Then it can handle it. Then it can cease. Report an error in the passage at 57:18 Highlight the passage at 57:18

57:45 The words are easy. It's the doing. Report an error in the passage at 57:45 Highlight the passage at 57:45

57:52 And the others. Report an error in the passage at 57:52 Highlight the passage at 57:52

58:09 Socially. Report an error in the passage at 58:09 Highlight the passage at 58:09

58:17 Well, in terms of if we relate it to interconnectedness, You know, there's the level that we need to develop as human beings of addressing the very real needs of interconnectedness. We need to wash the dishes. We need to organize the cooking rotas here. Someone needs to go to a doctor. The car needs to be filled with gas. We need to develop skillful communication techniques. We need to be builders and computer operators. Report an error in the passage at 58:17 Highlight the passage at 58:17

58:47 And so we develop all the worldly skills in this way of interconnectedness. And that development is... And the Buddha praised that kind of development to have skillful means in the world. It brings a certain kind of serenity, a certain kind of happiness because one was skillful in the world. And that's done as a kind of offering. Report an error in the passage at 58:47 Highlight the passage at 58:47

59:10 So say, this is for me, like in monastic life, I've learned to do plumbing. I had to put a sewage system in. That was a joke in Chithurst. They said, you were an engineer, weren't you? I said, yeah, but I failed. So they made me put the sewage system in, and they regretted it. Report an error in the passage at 59:10 Highlight the passage at 59:10

59:38 But to develop oneself for the sake of one's family, to develop good skills for the sake of society, these are very good things. And then the other, to understand interconnectedness, is to learn how to have this sense of inner serenity. Within the movement that we're experiencing. Now when we always emphasize inner serenity, then it sounds like on the social level we're passive. And that's where people mistake and think, oh, acceptance, that's okay for you, but what about this and what about that? Report an error in the passage at 59:38 Highlight the passage at 59:38

1:00:12 What about building shelters for women who are battered by their husbands? Or what about ecology and so on and so forth? So it sounds like Buddhism then is a very passive kind of thing. You just passively sit and let people step on your head. May they be well and so on. But that's a misunderstanding. So I think that's very important that we have to be socially active. Report an error in the passage at 1:00:12 Highlight the passage at 1:00:12

1:00:42 But our social activism is our monastery. So if I decide to... I'm working in a law office or something like that and I'm dealing with clients and doing briefs and so on and so forth. Well, then that is my monastery in the sense that's where I practice. The law office is like the shrine. That's where I practice mindfulness, I practice right speech, and I contemplate interconnectedness and how can I remain serene or still or clear or not attached within a very difficult situation. Report an error in the passage at 1:00:42 Highlight the passage at 1:00:42

1:01:18 So the monastery is just a model for mindfulness within social activism, whatever way one chooses. So not to think that Buddhism is just some sort of Passivity. Active or passive depends on the situation. It's not a position we take. So in terms of compassion, compassion doesn't have to be passive. Report an error in the passage at 1:01:18 Highlight the passage at 1:01:18

1:01:44 It can be active. You can say no in a way which is very protective and helpful. Or one can feel even outrage at... I just did a retreat in Toronto and we had a discussion around anger. Report an error in the passage at 1:01:44 Highlight the passage at 1:01:44

1:02:01 And some women there were saying, well... One woman especially said she was involved in creating a woman's refuge in Toronto for battered wives or something like that. And so we were talking about just the word anger. What is anger and does it have a usefulness in the world? And my own conclusion was from that, if I have an intention to hurt anyone else, that intention is going to poison my mind and poison other minds. Report an error in the passage at 1:02:01 Highlight the passage at 1:02:01

1:02:33 Eventually, somehow, it'll be harmful. But if I see some kind of injustice and then I decide to work for a more just society, maybe I feel anger initially, but then I work for a more just society, then that can be a very good motivation. But the importance is that to work for the justice is my meditation practice. It's not different than sitting on a cushion. It is the practice. Report an error in the passage at 1:02:33 Highlight the passage at 1:02:33

1:02:59 And then all the difficulties I face. I look at interconnectedness and how to stay still or develop non-attachment through that. In monasticism, we have dhamma vinaya. Report an error in the passage at 1:02:59 Highlight the passage at 1:02:59

1:03:15 We have the teaching and we have the rule. Now, I'm going through the rules with the novices. And if you've only read the suttas, it sounds very inspiring. If you've read the rules, it's very depressing. Because you have all these cases of these sort of... rogue monks and recalcitrant monks and people who tell the Buddha to shove off and all kinds of kind of, wow, this was happening in the Buddha's time. Report an error in the passage at 1:03:15 Highlight the passage at 1:03:15

1:03:41 And so a rule was formed, a kind of social structure was formed for the monastic community to live in. So there is like the social component and there's the dharma, there's dhamma-vinaya. Report an error in the passage at 1:03:41 Highlight the passage at 1:03:41

1:03:58 Anything else? Report an error in the passage at 1:03:58 Highlight the passage at 1:03:58

1:04:25 Nothing wrong with it, as long as that's not your only strategy. Because if that's your ultimate strategy when they die, you're done. And death is an important kind of contemplation because the thrust of the Buddhist teaching is the deathless. Report an error in the passage at 1:04:25 Highlight the passage at 1:04:25

1:04:43 Remember, when he sat under the tree, that's the way we talk about the realization. So this being a spiritual path, that word is very important, even if we don't understand it. But there is something, the transcendent, the self-sufficient, whatever ways we call that. So if you're... Report an error in the passage at 1:04:43 Highlight the passage at 1:04:43

1:05:03 If your emotional well-being is dependent, that's okay, but be prepared for the loss. So that's why we often bring the idea of change, impermanence, death. So there's nothing wrong with it because it can be very supportive and it can be very nurturing and very helpful on the path. In fact, the Buddha asks Ananda, Venerable Ananda, about the holy life. Report an error in the passage at 1:05:03 Highlight the passage at 1:05:03

1:05:29 And companionship in the holy life. And Venerable Ananda says 50 % of the holy life is companionship with spiritual beings. And the Buddha says, no, not 50, 100%. So the idea of kalyanamitta, or spiritual friends, is very, very important. Report an error in the passage at 1:05:29 Highlight the passage at 1:05:29

1:05:42 So how can we have friendships and warmth and all of that with the way where we don't get stuck, attached, where it doesn't cause us more pain. And the signs, of course, fear of loss. Jealousy, loneliness when the people aren't around, those are the signs that there's something that needs to be looked at. Report an error in the passage at 1:05:42 Highlight the passage at 1:05:42

1:06:14 It's like someone said to me, they said, I find classical music so calming and soothing. I said, fine, what are you going to do when you go deaf? They didn't like that. It's a kind of punch in the head, yeah, but it is kind of telling you, you know, that? Yeah. Report an error in the passage at 1:06:14 Highlight the passage at 1:06:14

1:06:36 What's the spiritual refuge? Where is that in us? What is that? What was the Buddha speaking of? Report an error in the passage at 1:06:36 Highlight the passage at 1:06:36

1:06:53 Great, yeah. Then you can enjoy it. Yeah, you can enjoy it. And when it's gone and you got the flu, that's okay. You know? Check it out. Report an error in the passage at 1:06:53 Highlight the passage at 1:06:53

1:07:12 Yes, in the back there. Uh-huh. Report an error in the passage at 1:07:12 Highlight the passage at 1:07:12

1:07:25 Yes. Report an error in the passage at 1:07:25 Highlight the passage at 1:07:25

1:07:38 I can just speak from my own experience. I like to, I love to read. Report an error in the passage at 1:07:38 Highlight the passage at 1:07:38

1:07:49 And... I enjoy reading history. I'm reading some medieval history now. I enjoy getting different perspectives on life. So I enjoy reading outside of religious ideas, for one thing. And then within spiritual, religious ideas, there are certain kinds of teachings I enjoy reading. I enjoy Advaita Vedanta. Report an error in the passage at 1:07:49 Highlight the passage at 1:07:49

1:08:12 I enjoy Thomas Merton. I don't know what he's talking about. I really said... Something strikes me about him, but I don't really understand the Christian idiom and so on. So I think that can be very healthy because you can compare or you can get different angles, like Sufism, like Rumi, this kind of love affair with truth. Report an error in the passage at 1:08:12 Highlight the passage at 1:08:12

1:08:35 It's a totally different angle of coming at it. So that I find very rich. But what I have found in sticking with the tradition, it's given me one mindset. which is consistent. It's given me a language. It's given me a language which I can talk with my fellow monks and nuns and lay people. I can talk about it. Report an error in the passage at 1:08:35 Highlight the passage at 1:08:35

1:08:57 The Buddhist words we use are kind of common reference points. It's given me a set of tools which reinforce each other, which have a language, which have a system, which have a method, which all lead to one thing, liberation. So that consistency has helped me to... Report an error in the passage at 1:08:57 Highlight the passage at 1:08:57

1:09:18 Remain consistent with my investigation, first of all. And it's given me also a way of considering other things. So I think the difficulty, if we get too eclectic, is we have no sort of fundamental structure which we're working from. And then if you start to mix structures and you don't understand the context of the language, then it can be very, very confusing. And you get a lot of sort of... Report an error in the passage at 1:09:18 Highlight the passage at 1:09:18

1:09:48 Half-baked ideas. So people come up, it's all one. Right, what does that mean? Or it's all karma. But what does that mean? So quite often what you get in a shallow consideration of ideas is a kind of inspiring tone to language. Report an error in the passage at 1:09:48 Highlight the passage at 1:09:48

1:10:14 Sort of religious babble. You can kind of... We're all one and we're all, you know, I can't even do it myself. But I've heard some people talk like that. It's very inspiring maybe, but at the end of it, what was that about? What was that really about? And then I think the danger there is we think we know something, but we don't really know. Report an error in the passage at 1:10:14 Highlight the passage at 1:10:14

1:10:39 We just have sort of high ideas. So what I found about this teaching was that it has very good tools for investigation. Very helpful for investigation. And I appreciated that consistency. But when that consistency becomes dogmatic, then you're done. Then you become brain dead. And you become a born-again Buddhist. And Buddhists aren't supposed to get born again. Report an error in the passage at 1:10:39 Highlight the passage at 1:10:39

1:11:09 Someone I was talking to, who was it? Someone was saying that, I think Sister Metanandi, she was saying about her father. Her father, how she defined young and old, she said her father has a very young mind because he's not stuck and he likes to hear new things. Whereas other people around in the old folks' place where he lives, they're just stuck in ideas. They have a very old mind. And that's what dogmatism is. Report an error in the passage at 1:11:09 Highlight the passage at 1:11:09

1:11:42 It's a dead mind. It's not a reflective mind. So that's the danger of just not being open to other things. Report an error in the passage at 1:11:42 Highlight the passage at 1:11:42

1:11:59 My voice is beginning to pull a number on me, so can we just finish with a few minutes of silence? And then we'll call it a day. Thank you for your attention. Report an error in the passage at 1:11:59 Highlight the passage at 1:11:59